This is funny! As usual, got this from my sister in this AM's email batch, I can always count on the littler sister for funny stuff. Yet, this one somehow rings oddly to the tune of real life.

Dear Kotex,



I recently noticed that the peel-off strip of my
pantiliner had a bunch of "Kotex Tips for Life" on it. Annoying advice
such as: - Staying active during your period can relieve cramps. -
Avoiding caffeine may help reduce cramps and headaches. - Drink 6-8
glasses of water a day to keep you hydrated and feeling fresh. - Try
Kotex blah blah blah other products



Obviously the individual behind this was someone who has
never possessed a functioning set of ovaries. Go ahead and tell a
menstruating woman that drinking 6-8 glasses of water will help keep her
feeling fresh. See what happens and report back. I'll wait.



While you're at it, dump out the coffee at work and
remove the chocolate from the vending machine. I garan-friggin-tee that
the first responders will be females who just ovulated.



Look, females don't need or want tips for living on
feminine hygiene products. Younger girls are already hearing "helpful"
crap like that from their elderly relatives. Veteran females have
already concocted their own recipes for survival, many containing
alcohol.



Printing out crap advice while sneaking in ads for the
brand that was already purchased is just plain annoying, not to mention
rude, and enough to send a girl running to the Always brand. Mostly we'd
like to forget that we even need these products. It's not a fun time,
but DO NOT try to cheer us up by adding smiley faces or bunnies or
flowery cutesy crap to your products or the packaging. Put the product in a
plain brown wrapper so we can throw it in our carts discreetly and have
it blend in among the wine and beer. There is nothing more annoying than
having a blinding pink package announcing your uterine state to everyone
in the store.



So take your tips for living and shove them right up
your arse!




Ovarily Yours,



Miss PMS