Thanks, everyone! There really is no need to get defensive - I appreciate every bit of advice, as there are many more years of experience on these boards than I could ever fathom.
Before I continue, I used my wife coming home as an excuse to remove her from her location (to show her off for a minute or two) and then put her back right in front of her hot side hide, which she immediately disappeared into happily. Problem solved.
Having said that, yes, I do understand the importance of controlling conditions religiously (you should've seen the controllers I used for my aquariums in the past). That's why I did my homework and purchased the best available thermostat for my new additions - a Herpstat 2. I am currently using it to control the flexwatt UTH on the hot side (probe directly on the UTH), and the fluorescent lights. I also have an old Herpstat Humidity that I purchased years ago that is in control of a humidifier in the room and a Ranco controller that is in control of an oil-filled radiator in the room. I also own a temperature gun that I use to verify the in-cage conditions. As I said in the OP, after a week of fine-tuning all of these, I feel confident that I have the basic environmental conditions dialed in.
In regards to the lights themselves, they are sold as an option with the T8 and there are several threads on these forums written by experienced keepers that use them in their display cages (on in particular that should probably be stickied). The room the snakes stay in does have a window, but it's still the darkest exterior room inthe house. I understand that they're not a necessity by any means, but I would prefer to have them so long as they are not causing harm to the animals that come into contact with them. This is why I immediately grabbed my temperature gun and scanned every millimeter of the light fixture on the other side of the divided cage to make sure it wasn't approaching 100 degrees. From the care guide written by Kevin McCurley on ReptileChannel.com, recommended hot side temperatures are between 88-96 degrees, which is why I wasn't panicked about the location of my new arrival.
Again - thanks for everyone's advice. Quite honestly, I was more scared of this thread turning into another "ball pythons aren't arboreal" debate than a "ball pythons have no use for light" debate.
Eric