Got a response to my text retracting my 2 weeks offer, saying "It's not healthy for you to be this spiteful. But yeah no problem I'm leaving ASAP". Fingers crossed he means that. Still getting locks for my door. I also (with some difficulty, I'll admit), refrained from responding "Cool story, bro" or "It's not healthy for you to push my limits" and instead responded with a "Thanks".