A Sad, Stressed out vent...

[darkangel]

Long read, beware....

After a lot of consideration, I've decided I just can't keep my boxer. Some of you may remember my thread when she first started showing aggression towards one of my other dogs, my husky. Much as I have tried and tried, things don't get better. My boyfriend and I have even attempted to keep them separated at all times in this house. It's a terrible situation.

Miranda the boxer came to us after she was severly mistreated and abandoned by her previous owners. She was very skinny with all ribs and shoulder bones showing. By my count, I think she has passed through at least four different people's hands before coming to us. I believe she was 8 or so months old, so I thought her still being a puppy would work to my advantage and I could change what had happened to her mind. I'm almost positive she was beaten, so this made any attempt at discipline (like a spank on the butt), even verbal discipline, ineffective, and just seemed to fuel her behavior. She is intensely insecure -- I've never seen anything like it. She reminds me of an overly self-conscious person. She becomes very jealous when I give any attention to my other dogs, and I think ultimately this is what started the fighting.

She has a huge problem with my husky, Roxie for some reason. Miranda will pick fights that look vicious and are almost impossible to break up -- there were times I was scared to death for my husky... But the aftermath of the fight always is that it's the boxer, and not the husky, that becomes the victim of the fight. Miranda has scars all over her face now. Apparently for all her zest in initiating the fights, she's not skilled at them. I tried to give her more attention, but this just seems to fuel her jealousy. I tried my best to remain calm separating the fights, thinking that maybe my panic was making things worse, but there was no change in her behavior. Most recently, separating them at all times seemed to be working, her face and ears were starting to heal, but she seems to always find a way...

Yesterday my husky came inside after getting loose. She usually won't just come back inside on her own, so I was praising her, and the other dogs were in the same room because I hadn't had a chance to separate them yet. I had just said "Good girl" to my husky, and that was it, the boxer attacked. Once she starts there is just no stopping. We had to shove a baby gate between the two of them to break things up. She has a cut in her ear, and her face which was finally starting to heal is now once again all cut up. And I just can't take this anymore. I've had it.

The sad thing is even though she has this huge aggression towards my dog, she's not all bad on her own. She's very sweet and loving, she's terrific with children. But she never should have come into a home with other dogs. And she can't now go into another home where there is any competition in that way. I can't even describe the guilt I feel. I feel like despite all my efforts, I've only made things worse. I just wanted to give her a good home. And now all I see is her face all scarred up, and her very insecure demeanor. I honestly feel like a terrible person. I don't understand how people can do this to their animals. I can't imagine this cute girl as a puppy and having someone beating on her and destroying her personality. It's not fair.

I'm going to put an ad in a local classifieds that states that she must be the only dog. I hope, god do I hope, that someone responds, and I hope I can be thorough enough in my screening to find someone that's may possibly give her the home she deserves. This is a picture of Miranda before all the fighting began and she got all the cuts on her face.



If you read this far, thank you... I just had to get all these feelings off my chest.

[jkobylka]

Such a tuff situation! So sorry to hear of your painful decision.

We recently had to give up a dog that just was not getting along well with our long-time dog. It was an extremely difficult, but trying to make it work had us so frustrated!

I'm happy to say that he went to a wonderful home and is now doing awesome. So he's happier and we are thrilled to know hes happy and healthy with a family that he fits in well with.

Justin

[Jonny2184]

That sucks... it's never fun giving a pet away!
Looks like a hansom dog though!

Hope you can find a great home for the pup!

[darkangel]

Thanks Justin and Jonny for the words of encouragement. It just sucks having to give up on an animal. The silver lining in this for me will be having a peaceful household again with my two dogs.

[littleindiangirl]

I watch that Cesar guy sometimes, the dog whisperer, and he deals with cases just like yours. Animals fighting for no reason, and he always gets the the root of the problem, as he says "he rehabilitates dogs, and trains humans." that would be cool if he showed up on your door step and everyone lived happily ever after

But really, its sad to hear your getting rid of her. Boxers are such pretty dogs.

[darkangel]

I watch that Cesar guy sometimes, the dog whisperer, and he deals with cases just like yours. Animals fighting for no reason, and he always gets the the root of the problem, as he says "he rehabilitates dogs, and trains humans." that would be cool if he showed up on your door step and everyone lived happily ever after

But really, its sad to hear your getting rid of her. Boxers are such pretty dogs.

It's kind of funny to hear that, because I've often wished he would show up myself.

Thanks for the reply.

[Ginevive]

Awe; this has to be a tough time. I can sympathize with you; awhile ago, we were close to getting rid of one of our horses b/c of horse-on-horse aggression issues but things cooled down and they finally settled on a pecking order and things are fine now. But I know the feeling. I also know that you know what is best; it sounds like she might just be a one-dog-house type of girl. My cat is like this; he loves humans but viciously attacks dogs and other cats so we are not getting anymore until after he passes on.
I wish you luck on whatever road you have to choose.

[Reediculous]

if i wasn't in an apartment........i would gladly take her off your hands and give her a great home! good luck with finding her a home......i can't imagine how tough this is for you


my only other suggestion, i don't know if you have already, but maybe seeking professional help with someone that is trained in aggression in dogs............

[Sunny1]

I just wanted to give you the website to another awesome dog trainer, who actually works with Ceasar sometimes(who I absolutely love!!! even named one of my pets after him....LOL). The trainer's name is Ed Frawley and he deals alot with German Shephards and training for schutzhund trials and police service training. He has a really awesome website and I have used some of his training techniques on my Lab (who was similar to your boxer... but I my lab had more dominance type issues and was always trying to dominate over my older dog who is much more submissive). Now some people don't like him because at first his training methods seem a little harsh, but it combines positive rewarding with corrections. I know that you are going through a tough situation and I wish you the best and hope that you can find your dog a great home!! But just in case you haven't fully decided to rehome him yet, this is the website:

http://www.leerburg.com

[darkangel]

Thanks Gin. I'm looking into a local boxer rescue as well, which I think would be much more effective at handling her adoption. My main concern is placing her in the right home. If she's not, she may end up going from home to home for the rest of her life, or worse, euthanized for her dog aggression.

Reediculous -- Thanks! She's a wonderful house dog so wherever she ends up I'm sure she'll make the best of it.

Sunny -- I appreciate it. I wish I had the cash to look into a behaviorist, but unfortunately my situation is really only going to be able to support basic obedience training.