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  1. #41
    BPnet Veteran cecilbturtle's Avatar
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    I have lots of opinions on this. The media is only partially to blame. Magazines will print what sells. If we stopped buying the ones with the anorexic looking models they would stop making them.

    Men and women ARE different! I embrace those differences. We are supposed to be different.

    As far as different standards in the work place, I don't think sex should ever be an issue. If a man or a woman can competently do a job then everything should be equal. When I was in college we discussed women firefighters. Do I think women should be fire fighters? Absolutely. But they need to be able to complete the same physical requirements as the men do. I don't want to burn in a fire because there were lesser standards for a woman to qualify to pull me out. If you can do the job great. If not, then find something else. That goes for anybody and any profession. As far as pay, it should reflect your work not your sex.

    I personally love women. ALL women! I don't have a specific type. I do like fit women. I'm an active guy so I want an active girl. I love tattoos. I love a feisty girl. The first thing we "judge" someone on is looks. Is that right? Of course it is! We all have different views on beauty and attraction. I should be allowed to find a fit, tattooed, girl attractive. I also shouldn't be made to feel bad because I don't find an overweight woman attractive. You do you and I'll do me.
    "you only regret the risks in life you DON'T take."

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  3. #42
    BPnet Royalty Mike41793's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by babyknees View Post
    Also, why is this just for women? Can't we discuss skinny vs. fat men?
    Certainly can, and i dont think the OP was purposely excluding them for any particular reason. Its just that in general society doesnt put nearly the same amount of pressure on men to "look beautiful" like it does with women. Im a bigger guy, not morbidly obese, but bigger, and ive never once seen a commercial or something and thought to myself "wow, i need to starve myself so i look pretty like that model on tv". I highly doubt im the only guy like that either, though i could be wrong. I know plenty of guys who are the opposite and are skinny as a rail, but theyre not eating a bunch to try and add weight so they look more muscular bc of pressure they feel from some commercial or something they saw. Idk, imo as far as media/society's portrayal of what an ideal body image is, the double standards between men and women really arent fair.
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  4. #43
    BPnet Veteran cecilbturtle's Avatar
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    Let me also add that I have 6 older sisters. I grew up seeing this first hand. It blows my mind the differences between what girls find attractive in girls and what guys find attractive in girls. Most of the guys I know will agree with this. We want to see less make up and more meat. We want a girl who is comfortable with herself not trying to make herself into a photo she saw once in a magazine. Chances are that most men have not seen that photo and don't care to.
    "you only regret the risks in life you DON'T take."

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  6. #44
    BPnet Veteran babyknees's Avatar
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    Re: In the nude! what do you think?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mike41793 View Post
    Certainly can, and i dont think the OP was purposely excluding them for any particular reason. Its just that in general society doesnt put nearly the same amount of pressure on men to "look beautiful" like it does with women. Im a bigger guy, not morbidly obese, but bigger, and ive never once seen a commercial or something and thought to myself "wow, i need to starve myself so i look pretty like that model on tv". I highly doubt im the only guy like that either, though i could be wrong. I know plenty of guys who are the opposite and are skinny as a rail, but theyre not eating a bunch to try and add weight so they look more muscular bc of pressure they feel from some commercial or something they saw. Idk, imo as far as media/society's portrayal of what an ideal body image is, the double standards between men and women really arent fair.
    I think I read the OP's intent incorrectly because I was grouchy already. Apparently my reading comprehension skills need work.


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  7. #45
    BPnet Veteran cecilbturtle's Avatar
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    Come on now Mike! You are a handsome devil!
    "you only regret the risks in life you DON'T take."

  8. #46
    BPnet Royalty Mike41793's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cecilbturtle View Post
    Come on now Mike! You are a handsome devil!
    As are you, good sir!

    (i failed to mention our stunning good looks in that post bc i didnt want to derail the thread. Now just thinking about us will get all these lovelaaay ladies too worked up to respond!)
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  9. #47
    BPnet Senior Member Andybill's Avatar
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    You mean when you see those guys with their thighs attached to their shoulders it doesnt make you want to take steroids??? I think the biggest thing for guys is at some point in their lives a lot of guys say "I wanna get big!" I like to lift weights and I think Arnold is probably my idol when it comes to lifting because he revolutionized bodybuilding but I dont want to look like that at all. Not even close. I think muscles are stupid looking when they get to a certain point. Sure I have looked at muscle and fitness magazines and saw a dude that was built and I thought I wanted to get like that. But the more I read the more I just want to keep a healthy lifestyle and be fit not be ripped.
    -Andrew Hall-

    Good night Chesty, wherever you are....


  10. #48
    BPnet Veteran Raptor's Avatar
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    Re: In the nude! what do you think?

    Quote Originally Posted by RoseyReps View Post
    Raptor,
    Throw the make up away. Dye your hair green and wear whatever the hell you want. I didn't mean fix it as in do things that other people think help. Do things to fix you for yourself. Your family saying those things is not a good place to be. As others have stated, there is compainionship for everyone. My husband and I own a little local hole in the wall bar. There is this girl that comes in, and she is about 4'8 4'10 Max. She is, by far, the life of the place when she comes in. She runs around and goofs off having a great time, she has purple hair, wears boyish clothes and turns every head in our place. She sings karaoke and people love to pick her up randomly. She is freaking awesome. She...sounds a lot like you. If you could get past what the people around you are saying...and I know that's hard.. but surround yourself with positive people. It takes time, but you can build that confidence. Being short is a pain, but it has it's perks. Like asking tall guys to help you reach the top shelf I wish you were close to us. I would love to introduce you to her and take you out with people who won't tell you how you should dress etc.

    Oh, and I hate make up. I only wear it maybe 3-4 times a year at most. I prefer my boots (20+ year old dingos) to any heels I own. Do and wear what makes you feel good.
    I generally wear what I want to, anyway. I just get tired of the crap for it. Parents have been bugging me to get some new shirts since a lot of mine are getting old. So, prior to the new semester, I did. A bunch of tees with graphics on them. The majority were black, but I liked the look of them. Got them home and my step-dad immediately grumbled something about being goth. Your friend sounds nothing like me, actually. While I would dress the same, I wouldn't act like that. I can't stand people I don't know touching me, for one. I'm fairly..Standoffish, I suppose.

    Quote Originally Posted by youbeyouibei View Post
    x2 to this, for anyone, Raptor as well. Been there and done that as far as listening to the negativity people can try to force feed you, especially family. I wrote most of mine off and couldn't be happier. Find your fireteam; the people or person who will go to the gates of Hell with you and back, no questions asked, who will share in the filet mignon times and the pork and bean times both and support you the same throughout it. Basically find the people that love you for YOU, family or not and like RoseyReps said, that starts with loving and accepting yourself for who you are & who YOU want to be.
    Unfortunately, all the people I know that do that are online and out of state. Truthfully, I doubt I'll ever accept/love myself. I never have. Even as a child I didn't like myself, didn't like my name, and I really still don't. It's an uncommon spelling of a common name and almost all my professors/instructors have to ask how to pronounce it. Suffice to say, I've never been a happy person.

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  11. #49
    BPnet Veteran sissysnakes's Avatar
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    Re: In the nude! what do you think?

    Quote Originally Posted by sissysnakes View Post
    I have really enjoyed everyones comments so far!

    Now for my two cents: For all you guys hatin on tall women you dont know what you are missing! lol lol

    It is not just our girls who are effected by the media and the overall absurd concept of a "feminine" figure. I remember a great amount of teasing from boys in JH and High School and later even boyfriends (in HS) centered around girls who did not fit the mold. I think it is wonderful that you want to educate your girls on body image, but I think the boys often need some educating as well. They are effected just as much as our girls, and can have an effect on our girls with out knowing any better.

    Not to mention men also get pressured to look a certain way, i had a friend in school who became anorexic and had to leave. He got teased so much for being fat that he stopped eating, and he wasn't fat to begin with. I know that it is unusual for men to develop these types of disorders, but the message is still there.
    Ah for my credit I did mention men as well in a later post. I would love for members to add opinions on men as well as women.
    *M.~


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  12. #50
    No One of Consequence wilomn's Avatar
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    Re: In the nude! what do you think?

    Quote Originally Posted by Raptor View Post
    I generally wear what I want to, anyway. I just get tired of the crap for it. Parents have been bugging me to get some new shirts since a lot of mine are getting old. So, prior to the new semester, I did. A bunch of tees with graphics on them. The majority were black, but I liked the look of them. Got them home and my step-dad immediately grumbled something about being goth. Your friend sounds nothing like me, actually. While I would dress the same, I wouldn't act like that. I can't stand people I don't know touching me, for one. I'm fairly..Standoffish, I suppose.



    Unfortunately, all the people I know that do that are online and out of state. Truthfully, I doubt I'll ever accept/love myself. I never have. Even as a child I didn't like myself, didn't like my name, and I really still don't. It's an uncommon spelling of a common name and almost all my professors/instructors have to ask how to pronounce it. Suffice to say, I've never been a happy person.
    So if you know what the problems are, why don't you fix them? Change your name. Toughen your shell or explain, one final time, how it makes you feel when they treat you that way, whomever they may be. Start now, while you're young and eventually you'll find something better. Hopefully you can take that betterness and grow it even more.

    It's better than being unhappy, I think.
    I may not be very smart, but what if I am?
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