Better Ignore Feature?

[Mike41793]

Mike would be ignored by everyone if we could.

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Everyone can ignore me if they want to haha.

[toyota89]

Aww you know we like you to much to ignore you. Wink wink

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[Kodieh]

Being married to a woman who is getting a masters in special education and focusing on bullying for her thesis, let me express that bullying is any tactic that puts down a person in your own interests.

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[Mike41793]

I bully people A LOT then haha. I bully myself for peoples own amusement too though, so i feel like it all evens itself out.

[Kodieh]

Haha, I think it's over sensitive personally. I feel physical actions are bullying. On the Internet, you can just turn it off and walk away

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[RoseyReps]

Being really really mean? Come on. We're all adults, well the majority anyways.

And NO! Not everyone on here is an ADULT. There are children on here and they DO read your posts. Don't make it seem like this harshness is just part of life on the forum... you don't have to be that way

The majority of people on this forum ARE adults. Do we have a percentage of members that are under 18? Yes. Do we have members that are under 15? A few. Do we have members under 10? Doubtful.

IMO there is no reason whatsoever to pretend that everyone is happy and never disagree or talk aabout how life really is. That, in all of it's sugary goodness, is the problem with the generations up and coming.

Kids over ten and even some below, have more than likely already figured out there are jerks in life, class, or on the internet.

Think of the children!! How about all the threads that have general sexual innuendo in them? Or talks of violence/violent happenings around the world? What about those threads and comments? Are these bp.net children too young to learn that life is full of jerks, and they shouldn't worry about it and let it roll, but not too young to know about bombings/shootings/general craptastic issues around thr world?

I know you're a good person Steffe, and I understand why it bothers you and you're trying to protect those who perhaps cannot take the heat of debate/truth/whatever the hell this is. But protecting them does little good. I tried to protect many people, but realized they will never get that tough skin if they continue to be "protected".

I'm not saying Sarah needs to be protected, I was just noting that I recognized what you are trying to do.

Definitely not "being mean" to either of you. I very much enjoy having you both as friends both here and on FB. That doesn't mean however, that we will always agree on everything 100%. I hope the both of you can see that and understand.

[angllady2]

I can see both sides to this argument. And yes, it is an argument.

I think Meow has a point. I have belonged to a forum or two where someone put on your ignore list just vanished from your sight. Of course, they could still see what you were saying, but anything they posted you did not see, nor could they PM you. The problem of course is people quoting the person you are trying to ignore. So if that bugs you a lot, just skip over those posts. It's what I did when I ignored the person who felt the need to stuff his opinions down my throat about my babies. Sure it takes effort on your part. And sometimes skipping over what was said is a lot easier said than done. You just have to adapt as best you can.

Fortunately for me, once I stopped rising to his bait, he pretty much crawled back under his rock and left me alone. Of course, sometimes that bait can be mighty tempting, and not rising to take it takes a lot of effort. But one thing I have found to hold true over many long years of dealing with bullies. Once you aren't fun to pick on anymore, they tend to find someone else to annoy. I could quote you every dumb line in the book. The old, be a better person, just ignore it, it only works if you respond, etc. etc. etc. But the fact remains, not everyone is cut out to deal with those people that way. It took me a long time to get to the point where I could, and the last thing I needed was people telling me what I already knew. I know it takes two to tango, so to speak, but darn it sometimes that beat just gets your feet moving before your brain can stop them. Over time I learned to turn up the volume on my own music, so the beat that they were playing was harder to hear.

Meow, I know how you feel, I really do. I know you already know everything people have been telling you about getting tougher, life isn't fair, this is the internet, blah, blah, blah blah. I just thought maybe you would like to hear someone say, I know how you feel. And I know how tough it can be, believe me I know. And I am going to ask you to do something even tougher. Don't let this person or people spoil this place for you. Don't let one bad apple spoil the whole bunch. Just throw the moldy one away and make cobbler with the rest. A little bit of spice, a little bit of butter, and a healthy dose of sugar are all you need to have something really special. Remember that sweetie.

Gale

[Kaorte]

That little bit of good, in my opinion, is worth it.

There is so much ugliness in this world. I don't to want to share this ugliness with people who share my passion if I can help it. If that means standing up for people who are getting ganged up on, so be it. Everyone deserves a voice. Everyone deserves to be heard with out judgements.

Disagreements are one thing, but when multiple people just tell someone to "get over it", that is not helpful. If they could have gotten over it, they would have already.

No hard feelings to anyone. Seriously. I don't hold grudges. If you've rubbed me the wrong way, its cool. I don't hold onto it and I don't hold past mistakes against anyone. We all make mistakes and we all have different opinions and experiences. It is what makes us unique and valuable!

I just wish people would be more kind to one another. It is only the internet, but sometimes it is easier to be hurtful since you don't see people face to face. Sometimes you don't realize what you said could be hurtful. You can never judge how someone else is feeling based on text posts alone. It just isn't possible!

I try to avoid negatively as much as possible. Sure sometimes I get angry, but who doesn't. We are all very passionate and opinionated people.

Treat people the way you'd like to be treated.
If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything.

These are simple things they tell children, but I feel like some adults need to hear it too from time to time

Just because one user would like a more functional ignore button does not mean they need to be ganged up on for having that opinion and asking a question.

It is a shame because I believe we have lost a very valuable member due to others being inconsiderate when they should be supportive.


PS: GALE, THANK YOU. I <3 YOU. This is what I am talking about guys!!

[wilomn]

Very interesting.

Meow, I get it, now get over it. By that I don't mean just soldier up and move on, I mean sit down, figure out what's bugging you, figure out what you need to do to fix it, decide what you CAN do to fix, then do that. Or lose.

In my world it's that simple. When you stop, or quit, or are no longer playing, the game is over and you lose. The game is simple. Survive until you can't play any more. You're allowed to do anything you want so long as you pay the price, good or bad, known or a mystery, you get to do what you want. If you want to be bullied, you will be. If you don't want to be, you won't be.

It's totally your decision. If you don't know how to stop it or think you can't by yourself, ask for help. Shoot me a pm if you need to.

Kodieh said "Being married to a woman who is getting a masters in special education and focusing on bullying for her thesis, let me express that bullying is any tactic that puts down a person in your own interests."

Bullfriggincrap

That may be so for those who can't defend themselves like special ed folks, but for guys like me and you, it just ain't so and you putting out there that it is is part of the problem we are having right here. People need to know how to deal with the crap life slings without hiding from it. If they insist on hiding from it, they have MADE THAT CHOICE, provided they are indeed like us and not mentally challenged.

Are you sure it's bullying that's bothering you and not something a little heavier in your personal life Meow?

[I-KandyReptiles]

Unless you're getting harassed by private messages, I haven't seen anything that would violate the TOS.

Tbh, it seems like you're getting mad because people aren't agreeing/siding with you in the past few threads you've started.