I think it should be a rule....

[BrandiR]

That you should only be allowed to chastise someone about their pet care practices if you are also going to offer suggestions/advice.

"What the crap is she talking about," you ask?

I fairly often on here see threads started asking for help. Usually, the poster receives several answers to the original question. But they are often also met with mild hostility without an offer of what they should be doing differently. Sometimes it's blatant, and sometimes it's disguised as an innocent question, but very obviously a dig. For example, there was a thread in General BPs recently where the poster wanted to know what to do about a BP that had been bitten by a boa. Many people posted asking why they were housed together. It's a legitimate question, sure. But why ask it if you don't have anything of substance to offer? If you don't know enough about the topic to offer something he/she can use, then do you know enough about the topic to criticize?

There was another thread in the Care-something section about a snake that had died. Someone "innocently" asked, "Is this the one that was housed with the _______?" That was it. No offer of condolences or anything.

What is the point in doing that? I'm not opposed to expressing concern over someone else's practices, but you should tell them point blank that you think they are doing it wrong, tell them why, tell them how to do it "right", and then answer the question they are asking if you can. If you are just replying to a post to make someone feel worse about a bad situation, that isn't very nice.

I screw up about every five minutes, more often on a bad day. I can take criticism over what a screw-up I am, but only if it's combined with genuine concern and desire to help me.

I'm just saying that I think some of us could be a little more compassionate and help solve the problem before jumping right to, "Well, you stupid jack ass, what did you expect??" I guess I think you should buy the right to question someone's practices and the currency should be input related to the question they are asking.

Off-Topics and direct requests for opinions are different. Those are fair game.

[ewaldrep]

I know just what you are saying, I just had a post like that earlier. I asked a question that I was unsure about and the first response was "its a no brainer" with absolutely no feedback whatsoever. What can ya do about it though, at least there were other posts with more helpful feedback. No real answer to my question, I suspect that many people may by uncritically accepting what information they like and don't like to be questioned. There is also the downward social appraisal effect where people may feel better about themselves by comparing themselves to others that are not as smart or nuanced in the "reptile world". As long as I get info that I can use I will keep coming back anyway.

[Kodieh]

I agree to an extent, but at some point (like the boa bit python thread) common sense needs to kick in somewhere. There are times, like humidity concerns or feeding schedules, that many people should keep their unrelated "dig" to themselves. I do it quite often, when a newer member shares a picture and you see something their doing "wrong" in their tank in the background. There are other times when, like the boa bit python thread, that someone needs to nut up or shut up and just ask "What the :cens0r: were you thinking?".

Had a guy last night, actually, post in a local to me reptile classifieds/sharing group on FB post that he got his first snake (a retic. Yeah, a RETIC) and the person who sold it didn't mention it was "mean". He wanted to "trade it for a boa or other python or something. i cant have a mean snake". Everyone before me offered help and that that's how baby retic's are, this that and the other. So, I prefaced my response with "I'll be the harsh one then". I proceeded to tell him it was wise that he does not acquire any other snake at all (in the best case) and that he should look into corn snakes, they'd be more on his level. Just beat this kids brow into the ground for the poor, uneducated decision he made. He got hiffy and left the group, after claiming that our group was "bull:cens0r:" and that I could take my ":cens0r:" else where. I did reference, many times, that what he did reflected poorly on everyone and that for the sake of my hobby to do his research next time.

Just beat his brow for it. And, in situations like that, it has to be done. But, I agree that many times people are a little hostile on larger forums. At some point, it stops being about the individual member because you're so large one person's nay-say isn't going to affect the forum in any consequential way.

[iCandiBallPythons]

That you should only be allowed to chastise someone about their pet care practices if you are also going to offer suggestions/advice.

"What the crap is she talking about," you ask?

I fairly often on here see threads started asking for help. Usually, the poster receives several answers to the original question. But they are often also met with mild hostility without an offer of what they should be doing differently. Sometimes it's blatant, and sometimes it's disguised as an innocent question, but very obviously a dig. For example, there was a thread in General BPs recently where the poster wanted to know what to do about a BP that had been bitten by a boa. Many people posted asking why they were housed together. It's a legitimate question, sure. But why ask it if you don't have anything of substance to offer? If you don't know enough about the topic to offer something he/she can use, then do you know enough about the topic to criticize?

There was another thread in the Care-something section about a snake that had died. Someone "innocently" asked, "Is this the one that was housed with the _______?" That was it. No offer of condolences or anything.

What is the point in doing that? I'm not opposed to expressing concern over someone else's practices, but you should tell them point blank that you think they are doing it wrong, tell them why, tell them how to do it "right", and then answer the question they are asking if you can. If you are just replying to a post to make someone feel worse about a bad situation, that isn't very nice.

I screw up about every five minutes, more often on a bad day. I can take criticism over what a screw-up I am, but only if it's combined with genuine concern and desire to help me.

I'm just saying that I think some of us could be a little more compassionate and help solve the problem before jumping right to, "Well, you stupid jack ass, what did you expect??" I guess I think you should buy the right to question someone's practices and the currency should be input related to the question they are asking.

Off-Topics and direct requests for opinions are different. Those are fair game.

Welcome to reptile forums, where everyone is a professional and knows more than the next person. Then POOF in a month or too theyre gone onto other interests

[BrandiR]

I agree to an extent, but at some point (like the boa bit python thread) common sense needs to kick in somewhere. There are times, like humidity concerns or feeding schedules, that many people should keep their unrelated "dig" to themselves. I do it quite often, when a newer member shares a picture and you see something their doing "wrong" in their tank in the background. There are other times when, like the boa bit python thread, that someone needs to nut up or shut up and just ask "What the :cens0r: were you thinking?".

Had a guy last night, actually, post in a local to me reptile classifieds/sharing group on FB post that he got his first snake (a retic. Yeah, a RETIC) and the person who sold it didn't mention it was "mean". He wanted to "trade it for a boa or other python or something. i cant have a mean snake". Everyone before me offered help and that that's how baby retic's are, this that and the other. So, I prefaced my response with "I'll be the harsh one then". I proceeded to tell him it was wise that he does not acquire any other snake at all (in the best case) and that he should look into corn snakes, they'd be more on his level. Just beat this kids brow into the ground for the poor, uneducated decision he made. He got hiffy and left the group, after claiming that our group was "bull:cens0r:" and that I could take my ":cens0r:" else where. I did reference, many times, that what he did reflected poorly on everyone and that for the sake of my hobby to do his research next time.

Just beat his brow for it. And, in situations like that, it has to be done. But, I agree that many times people are a little hostile on larger forums. At some point, it stops being about the individual member because you're so large one person's nay-say isn't going to affect the forum in any consequential way.

In reply to part one, referencing the Python/Boa thread, I disagree. I don't think anyone "needs" to ask, "What were you thinking?" and leave it at that. If someone wants to know what this person was thinking, of course it's their right to ask. It is a public forum afterall. I'm just saying that it isn't necessary to ask at the time, unless the answer to that question holds the key to the helpful response. For example, the first thing people almost always ask is, "What is your temp/humidity? How are you measuring?" This is a necessary question because the answer may hold the answer to the OPs question. When someone says, "My snake is doing _______ because it was bitten by a boa, what should I do?" There is no necessary information to be found in the question, "Why were they housed together?"

As for the Retic-Boy on Facebook, I didn't see the exchange so I obviously don't know what I think about it. Based on the information you've given, it sounds like you simply (maybe aggressively) told someone that a Retic is not a good beginner snake and that said person should do some research before getting ANY snake. If I'm correct, I agree with you for speaking up, even if you probably didn't say it the way I may have It sounds like opinions were asked for. If this is the case, you offered an opinion.

When someone says, "A rat bit my snake and it's bleeding, what do I do?" In my opinion, "Why do you feed live?" is not an appropriate or helpful response. Do you see the difference?

[Kodieh]

In reply to part one, referencing the Python/Boa thread, I disagree. I don't think anyone "needs" to ask, "What were you thinking?" and leave it at that. If someone wants to know what this person was thinking, of course it's their right to ask. It is a public forum afterall. I'm just saying that it isn't necessary to ask at the time, unless the answer to that question holds the key to the helpful response. For example, the first thing people almost always ask is, "What is your temp/humidity? How are you measuring?" This is a necessary question because the answer may hold the answer to the OPs question. When someone says, "My snake is doing _______ because it was bitten by a boa, what should I do?" There is no necessary information to be found in the question, "Why were they housed together?"

As for the Retic-Boy on Facebook, I didn't see the exchange so I obviously don't know what I think about it. Based on the information you've given, it sounds like you simply (maybe aggressively) told someone that a Retic is not a good beginner snake and that said person should do some research before getting ANY snake. If I'm correct, I agree with you for speaking up, even if you probably didn't say it the way I may have It sounds like opinions were asked for. If this is the case, you offered an opinion.

When someone says, "A rat bit my snake and it's bleeding, what do I do?" In my opinion, "Why do you feed live?" is not an appropriate or helpful response. Do you see the difference?

Yes, I agree, redundancies are redundant. Obviously the person is feeding live, how could a frozen rat bite! So, I suppose maybe you're into a different strand than I am on the subject. But, all in all, I'm right there with you. If we're not here to help, and help nicely, why exist?

[BrandiR]

Yes, I agree, redundancies are redundant. Obviously the person is feeding live, how could a frozen rat bite! So, I suppose maybe you're into a different strand than I am on the subject. But, all in all, I'm right there with you. If we're not here to help, and help nicely, why exist?

Um...."Why do you feed live?" is different than, "Why? Do you feed live?"

Really, more than anything, I'm just happy to see that you're all for helping and helping nicely

[devildog_dk]

I think you have good idea but the biggest problem with it is just flat out people being people: that being there are always going to be blatant idiots that go "Ooohh snake I'm gonna buy it" versus the (thankfully) majority of us that do the research and understand their requirements before taking possession and care of the animal.

I agree with the common sense thing too... if even without any research at all you're still too dull to realize that 2 different animals that come from 2 different continents and ecosystems (and even as a 2nd grader I had enough common sense to see the difference) yet still decide to house them together then you're just asking for it; especially if you only start to question your decision and seek help after a problem had arisen from it. Remember: True idiots have to be told and proven they're idiots before they might even start see it. (I just made that up, feel free to quote it; duty free )

And even with the live feeding I'd be willing to bet that there are more people that keep a single snake (probably poorly) and feed it live because "Durrrr my snake just kilt that there rat" than even the majority that do it responsibly and have the live feeders available to make it a convenient alternative. Even between my gf's and my collections we only have to feed 2 live and I consider it a pain more than anything because I don't want to keep enough rodents in our current place to even sustain that. So when either of us aquires a new snake and it takes F/T we consider it a win.

[BrandiR]

True idiots have to be told and proven they're idiots before they might even start see it. (I just made that up, feel free to quote it; duty free )

There's no way I'm using that.

[devildog_dk]

Not sure if you're joking or not, but I was.