Question for bp.net members in military.

My wife and I have been looking into the military, and we're curious about peoples experiences. I'd like to hear from anyone here on bp.net who is either in the military, have a spouse in the military, or have been recently. We're most interested in the army as the air force isn't actively recruiting and we're not interested in joining the navy or marines. I'd like to hear the overall goods and bads of your experiences and whether or not you recommend it/would do it again and so forth. Thanks in advance!

Well, no first hand military experience, but this might get you thinking:

My best friend from college went into dental school last year.

At the end of this year, she decided she wants to try to get into the navy and let them pay for her schooling while she fixes soldier teeth on ships.

She seems VERY excited about it, but she's also going to be a non-combat officer and get to do what she calls "wussy boot camp for doctors and dentists".. And she'll have people saluting her the first day after boot camp.

A high school friend of my GF went into the marines, as a member in the military band. They then shoved him off to Iraq to be posted as a guard at various military base locations. He wasn't happy about that.

Other people I know who went into the military at various points in the past don't have much to say on the subject.

I can't imagine anything being more stressful on a marriage than either spouse, much less BOTH spouses, going into the military. I had thought about going into the air force or navy back in college, but realized that I had other priorities in life, and that wouldn't let me give 100% to the people I love. None of the people I know who served in any of the branches going in with a relationship intact were discharged with that relationship still intact.

I was in the Army for 8 years, C co. 2/187th Infantry 101st airborne was my longest stay in one duty station and that was 3 years.

I loved almost everything about the Army, being in the infantry was like a big camping trip with your friends except this time you bring high powered weapons:D

I was also single when I was in and this helped me a ton, I took every single school I could and we where always in the field or overseas. The guys I know that where married had a rough time being gone so much, it may be different in other parts of the Army but the Infantry is pretty isolated from the other MOS's.

* Edit - I have to say I think a marriage can work in the military but it must be built on trust and understanding because alot of the time you will not be together. This is why I got out of the military, I wanted kids and did not want to raise them while being gone 6-7 months out of the year

Another point I didn't make clear was that although we're both looking into the military, only one of us is planning on actually enlisting. Neither of us have finished 4 years of school as of yet so we won't get to go in the officer program right away. My wife is most interested in the armys vet tech program. She is currently a vet tech already and loves the work and she is going to school to become a full fledge Vet. One of the biggest bonuses is having the army pay for the rest of her schooling as her current boss that recently got out of vet school is paying 3100 a month in student loans. We understand the possiblity of being sent to a war zone is possible, although most of what we have read/heard from speaking to other army vet techs is that not as many go, especially women as they can't go to combat as it is. Also, although I'm looking as well we're leaning more and more toward her going as most of the jobs I'm interested in are combat jobs, giving me a near 100% chance of being sent overseas and my wife is not happy with those odds. We both will not be enlisting as besides the extra strain on the marriage, we don't feel it's fair to our parents or our daughter to have us both possibly sent away and have our child being raised by her grandparents. Other then that any advice or experiences both pro/con are greatly appreciated as we don't want to go into this without having all of our bases covered.

I was active duty army, Military Police Corps. They trained me to protect and serve, then crammed me in a gate shack out in the middle of nowhere in New Mexico for 4 years waving traffic through and being yelled at if I happed to miss an officer's wife. :rolleyes: I did spend a stint in the PRP program working around a nuclear site, but that was even more boring than the gate rat gig.

If you enjoy having someone control every movement you make and pay you little for it, the military is for you. I watched so many friends purposefully get themselves into trouble so they could get kicked out. Of course I guess each person's experience and each base will of course be different. My dad was a lifer active duty army combat engineer and enjoyed his time I think. I had a lot of fun and some interesting times along with some of my worst lows ever and wouldn't give up that experience for the world, but I sure as heck wouldn't do it again. The sense of pride was nice, but then I'd look into my wallet. LOL They've been giving me the runaround about giving me the college money I paid into now that I want to go into Veterinary Medicine and need the help to pay for college.

My husband has been in the Coastguard for years and he's done well for himself. Job security is a great thing, and the benefits are wonderful for our family.

I have not personally been in the military, but I have a lot of friends and family who have been. Most of them considered it more positive than negative. Some consider it VERY positive, and I don't know anyone who considered it highly negative.

There are lots of benefits, and some of them go on even after you are no longer active. For example, being able to get a VA loan can make buying your first house a lot easier.

The disadvantages mostly seem to be of the "it wasn't the right thing for me" type. I think some people don't realize how different it can be than a regular job. Yeah, your boss tells you what to do, but being told what to do by the military is different.

As far as it being stressful to your marriage... well, LIFE is stressful to a marriage. It depends a lot on how the 2 of you as individuals and as a couple will decide to deal with that stress. Some military spouses are very proud of what their spouse is doing, and that can make it more positive than negative. Of course it is stressful if/when/ they go overseas and you can't be sure they'll be coming home alive, but you do not have to allow that stress to consume you.

I think it is very good, since you have a child, that you are only thinking of one or the other, not both, enlisting. I would be careful about what reasons you have for choosing which one of you it will be. If you base it mostly on which one is less likely to get sent overseas, then that person gets sent anyway, how will you handle that? I think you should be sure that which ever one joins, you are willing & able to cope with the situation if they do get sent off.

Don't worry, we have lots of other reasons besides just who's job would be more likely to be sent overseas as a deciding factor. That was just one of the percs of her going in to me that happens to stand out. I'm more interested in the army as enjoying every bit of it. I love the physical and mental challenge, where as my wife loves the job stability and the career advancement. There are pro's and con's for each of us and we're trying to make sure every detail we possibly can have looked at, has been. I appreciate everyones experiences so far and as soon as my wife is home from work today I'll be having her look over this as well!

I've been a military spouse for almost 19 years now...and no end in sight yet. :P My hubby is in the Air Force, so I can't speak directly to the Army experience.

The military as a whole offers some tremendous benefits...from almost entirely free medical to phenomenal educational programs to opportunities to travel and see more of the country and the world than most of us ordinary folks ever get to. Of course, with all the benefits come a LOT of challenges and risks.

While it may be true that men are more likely to be sent to Iraq...plenty of women go as well. From all the services. I know many Air Force women serving in combat zones with the Army in Iraq. So being a woman would not necessarily shield from that aspect of military life. Being a vet tech? I don't know...but I think they're utilized in war zones quite a bit as well. Dogs are a big part of military security.

But...the educational programs they have would make it very easy for her to go on to earn a full veterinary degree compared to having to do it in the civilian world. And new programs are coming along all the time. Now, there are programs for spouses to get educational help as well. And the military members can share their allotted years of college education with their spouses or children. (Because of my hubby's service, we'll be able to "give" two years of university each to my daughter and son)

Yes, it IS a huge challenge to the married couple and family with kids. But if your commitment to each other is strong, and your priorities as a team are in line with each other, it's a phenomenal adventure! We move a lot...hubby is gone a lot....war sucks....but I wouldn't trade our life for anyone else's.

:salute:

I served 4 years in the Marine Corps right out of high school (94-98)and have been in the Army since 98.... I have also served an 18 month tour in Iraq...
I don't have any regrets but I feel one must be 100% informed on this decesion.... a recruiters info does not count... If your seriously thinking about it.. I will be more than happy to talk to you..... remember this is a HUGE decesion.... the military is not for everyone...dont jump into it... there are many pros and cons.. email me and ill give you my cell number... dont make this decesion alone... knowledge is power....

-Marc
Lafayette, Louisiana

marcus_tu@yahoo.com

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by TheOtherLeadingBrand

My husband has been in the Coastguard for years and he's done well for himself. Job security is a great thing, and the benefits are wonderful for our family.

---

Very cool...I've been in the CG for over 18 years. Good to see other Coasties here! :gj: Where are you guys stationed? I'm at CG Headquarters in DC.

Thanks everyone for all of the comments and support, we go to take our test tomorrow and we're not making any decisions until we get the scores back and see what jobs are available that we qualify for. We've read numerous books on the subject and talked to everyone we know who's been in the military, regardless of which branch. I really do appreciate everything that everyone here has had to say on the subject and welcome any other comments!

Just got out the Navy but that's not appealing to you guys, so I'll reserve my comments. Good luck, and I hope you get everything you expect out of the military.