Roommate Issue

Ok, so here's the story. Our friend's lease was coming up in June and he had no place to go. He was planning on couch hopping for the summer until he figured out where to go. We, the ever so helpful friends had a second bedroom we were using for the snakes and rats. Come live with us, we said. We won't charge you too much in rent and you can take the second bedroom. We will just move everything downstairs into the living room. He agreed. Then his friend comes to visit. Friend asks if his friend can stay for a while. We agree. This then turns into a stay for a year deal. Oy!

So friends move in and bring with them 3 ferrets. They also find a stray and say "Can we keep him?" Sure why not. *bangs head on wall* <-This was fine then, but now the cat just annoys me. Everything was fine and dandy for the first month or two. Then the problems start. I get down on my hands and knees and scrub the upstairs bathroom spotless. Its beautiful and smells wonderful. Two days later, my roommate cuts second roommates hair in upstairs bathroom and leaves a mess. Does not clean it for 2-3 days! We are talking hair in my sink! When he does finally clean it, he does a HalfA** job.

Oh did I mention that said roommate gave his car to his mother because he didn't want anything to do with his mother...who owned the car. So, he began asking us for rides at 5am in the morning. This was fine at first, but then it just got old. I used to be a morning person, but now not so much. Oh, did I mention they also use my cat food and cat litter for their cat without saying so much as thankyou? *bangs head on wall a second time* I have told them once before that the AC has to stay at 75, since I have snakes and fish. This is a good temperature. Not too hot for the mammals, not to cold for the reptiles. This morning we wake up and someone has turned the AC down to 65. The thermometer I keep in the living room with the reptiles reads 63. I was about to punch someone in the face.

They let their ferrets poop on the carpet upstairs! They let their cat out into the main part of the apartment where my dog is, after we asked them not to. (When the dog first came home, the cat scratched him above his eye. There was a lot of blood. We were not happy...neither was the dog). They also bring in a new ferret without even sending me a text while I'm at work to say "Hey is it ok if we bring in a new ferret." Nope, instead they show up after I get off work with the ferret with them. I was pissed.

So, we are in a bit of a dilemma. Do we talk to them, make them angry (they will get angry or very upset with us, which will make things worse)? Do we kick them out? Find new roommates? Keep it just the two of us? We want to be good friends but I feel we are being taken advantage of. If I want to go around cleaning up after someone, I'll have a damn child. If I want to leave stuff around and not clean, that is my choice. Its my house. I'm on the lease, I pay the majority of the rent. (they say they shouldn't have to pay equal shares of the rent because OUR snakes and rats are in the living room which is community space. Might I mention the snakes and rats were moved down there so that they would have a fricken place to live!)

Ugh! I just don't know what to do. *bangs head on wall a third time*

I feel your pain. I've had so many problems with roommates in the past two years, its been ridiculous. I know from experience that if you talk to them about the situation they're most likely going to get defensive. Its really a catch 22. You deal with the stuff happening or you talk to them and run the risk of getting them angry.

But in your case if your the one who has signed the lease and they haven't I think you have the upper hand. Let them know how you feel and what changes you want made. Then if they don't change you can tell them to leave. It sounds like you've been more than kind helping them out.

good luck

Things won't change...I can tell you from experience. Finding a good roommate is a difficult thing to do...for some reason :confuzd: People don't respect you and your belongings the way one should expect them to.

You could tell them how annoyed you are...but that won't change the fact that they still have animals that use your home as their bathroom.

In this situation, you should probably write down a list of everything thats going on...every little thing...laziness, poo everywhere, mooching, etc. etc....and present this as a list of why you wish for them to be gone in 30 days. Do it as nicely as possible without pissing them off.. for some odd reason, people that get pissed will only stay longer to spite you.


Also, check out A Roommate Survival Guide, which, incidentally is called "The Boa's Gotta go" :P

I bought this book and it has worked wonders for helping me find roommates and lay down rules without getting walked all over.

Roommates tend to push boundaries, and when that pushing is never pushed back, the limits only increase on what they feel they can do.

OMG! I would be so hissed.... I would talk to them now before something REALLY bad happens.. Cause if you let it go on things are just going to keep adding up. Pretty soon after that its natural that you might blow up and that would be scary. I suggest talking to them before they get to your breaking point. I would say NO MORE ANIMALS! holy crud I bet your house smells just like a ferret litter box too... my friend has only one ferret and don't get me wrong its cute and all but MAN do they STINK!! Sorry bout your problem! Hope everything goes ok!

If it were me, they would be gone....I would give them two weeks

Why would you want to be a good friend to someone who isn't? They're overstepping your welcome and from the sounds of things, they have NO consideration for you or your animals :mad:


get ta steppin'!!!

Thats why I don't think I would ever be able to have a roommate!

They set the AC to 65???? Its over 100 outside here in AZ and our thermostat is always set to 77-78, sometimes 79, and 77 is FREEZING! I actually have to close the vents in my room because it gets so cold.

Just talk to them I guess, its your place and they need to understand you're doing them a favor by letting them live there and if they don't want to comply with you then they can find a new place. If you don't talk to them they will just keep doing it or get worse and eventually something will happen where you probably won't be able to keep it to yourself anymore.

Speak with them and explain to them why you are needing them to move within 30 days.

If you don't want anger/confrontation/whatever issues, then just let them know you have issues or are in need of space or whatever. In other words, take on the 'fault' of this situation not working out without blaming them.

Since they are not on the lease, they have no recourse.

As an aside, are you permitted (in your lease) to rent out rooms? If not, blame it on the lease and the owner wanting this situation to cease.

One more thing....you HAVE to check your local laws. you cannot boot someone out in 2 weeks, you cannot change locks. You may have to resort to eviction....which will kill friendships...it's one of the reasons why friendships go down the drain.

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

We won't charge you too much in rent and you can take the second bedroom. *

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Is the rent charged enough to keep you sane?

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

Then his friend comes to visit. Friend asks if his friend can stay for a while. We agree. This then turns into a stay for a year deal. Oy! *

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Was rent increased?

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

Two days later, my roommate cuts second roommates hair in upstairs bathroom and leaves a mess. Does not clean it for 2-3 days! We are talking hair in my sink! When he does finally clean it, he does a HalfA** job. *

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Did you complain about it? atleast tell him to clean that :soapbx:!!!!

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

So, he began asking us for rides at 5am in the morning. This was fine at first, but then it just got old. *

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Let him know "I used to be a morning person, but now not so much."

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

Oh, did I mention they also use my cat food and cat litter for their cat without saying so much as thankyou? *bangs head on wall a second time* *

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You are banging the wrong persons head. No pun intended.

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

I have told them once before that the AC has to stay at 75, since I have snakes and fish. This is a good temperature. Not too hot for the mammals, not to cold for the reptiles. This morning we wake up and someone has turned the AC down to 65. The thermometer I keep in the living room with the reptiles reads 63. I was about to punch someone in the face. *

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Now it boils down to the well being of ur pets... Shoulda punched someone

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

They let their ferrets poop on the carpet upstairs! They let their cat out into the main part of the apartment where my dog is, after we asked them not to. (When the dog first came home, the cat scratched him above his eye. There was a lot of blood. We were not happy...neither was the dog). They also bring in a new ferret without even sending me a text while I'm at work to say "Hey is it ok if we bring in a new ferret." Nope, instead they show up after I get off work with the ferret with them. I was pissed. *

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Again well being of pets at risk. You should add a monthly fee for each of their pets.

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

(they say they shouldn't have to pay equal shares of the rent because OUR snakes and rats are in the living room which is community space. Might I mention the snakes and rats were moved down there so that they would have a fricken place to live!) *

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Well i have experience similar situation with my roommate but i wrote up a contract/lease agreement with rules, regulations and boundaries breach the agreement your gone. Its technically your house so Fukc them if they dont comply. Make them pay more or then give them the living room and take back you Snake room.

sorry for the long post its just that i can really relate.....:taz::rolleye2:

We have ferrets so we know what the poo can smell like (trust me, I just cleaned their cage.) Ours are not litterbox trained, not even in their own cage. (We are in the process of training.) And so we make sure that all out of cage play is supervised (they let theirs run around at night in the room unsupervised while they sleep), and if there are any signs of impending poopage (backing up into a corner) we scoop them up and put them in the litterbox/cage. If we don't catch them in time, we clean up the poop. Simple, no?

When it was just the fiance and I, rent was fine, since its "our" money. I was ok with paying a little more than half since my fiance was in school. (Now he's not so we are splitting our share of the rent 50/50, as is fair.)

Rent total is 685, that includes a $20 pet rent for two cats (yea, we have broken that policy oh so badly with the 12 snakes, rat colony, cats, sugar glider, ect) At first, since our roommate was broke and in massive debt (due to a crappy ex) I said 100 for the room. (at least until he got back on his feet) So just this past month I was short on money due to the accident in Virginia Beach with my jeep. (having that B*t*h towed was a pain in my butt) so I asked them if they could pay 300 (they both work two jobs so I know they can do it) They got all defensive saying they shouldn't have to pay that much since my snakes are downstairs. So now their rent in 285 (together) and my fiance and I pay the other 400 together. Crappy isn't it. The snakes wouldn't be in the living room if they hadn't moved in. Oh and that room they are living in was perfect for my snakes. Even if the AC is set to 75, its always stays 5 or so degrees warmer than the rest of the house.

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

We have ferrets so we know what the poo can smell like (trust me, I just cleaned their cage.) Ours are not litterbox trained, not even in their own cage. (We are in the process of training.) And so we make sure that all out of cage play is supervised (they let theirs run around at night in the room unsupervised while they sleep), and if there are any signs of impending poopage (backing up into a corner) we scoop them up and put them in the litterbox/cage. If we don't catch them in time, we clean up the poop. Simple, no?

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My daughter use to have ferrets and sometimes training is not so simple! They are fast little buggers, and when you have more than one it can be a handful to litter box train them! She use to put a triangle litter box in every corner of her room to help them to figure it out (when they were outside of their multi-level cage). It became pretty hopeless though; they just weren't consistent with the location of their poopage!!

Ah well........................

Sorry for all the ranting. My fiance and I just really do not know what to do. We don't want to lose them as friends, but we cannot deal with this for much longer. They are great friends, but terrible roommates.

Nice guys/girls never win! Of course they brought home a new ferret, why wouldn't they, you seem to be okay with everything else.

They are inconsiderate and are walking all over you and your SO. You need to lay down the law and/or ask them to move. Why would you even hesitate being blunt with them when they have absolutely no consideration for you or your house.

Pick your poison....................... :oops:

BTW: They don't sound like great friends...............................

Mine hate the idea of a litter box. I put one in their favorite pooping location in their cage and they move it to the other side, poop in the corner and sleep in the litter box. :confused::confused::confused:

So then I took a hanger, cut it up, cut holes in the litter box, and wired the darn thing to the corner of the cage. All that work and what do they do......pick another corner. :taz:

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

Mine hate the idea of a litter box. I put one in their favorite pooping location in their cage and they move it to the other side, poop in the corner and sleep in the litter box. :confused::confused::confused:

So then I took a hanger, cut it up, cut holes in the litter box, and wired the darn thing to the corner of the cage. All that work and what do they do......pick another corner. :taz:

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They aren't cats after all.... ;)

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Originally Posted by Nate

One more thing....you HAVE to check your local laws. you cannot boot someone out in 2 weeks, you cannot change locks. You may have to resort to eviction....which will kill friendships...it's one of the reasons why friendships go down the drain.

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in most states if someone lives with you for more than 30 days you have to go threw the eviction process.

Well I figured out how to throw the "we are not paying equal rent because your animals are in the living room" in their face. If I am paying an extra $60 because my animals are in the living room, then technically I am renting the living room as my own personal space for $60, right. Well, then their cat and their ferrets are no longer allowed in the living room. Simple. That gets the cat away from my dog and sugar glider. If they want their cat to be able to have the run of the house, then they need to cough up the extra $60 to make the rent even.

Oh and technically they are not allowed to be living here. The agreement was that they would go on the lease when we renewed the lease in November. That was all fine with them. Then when I asked them about it a few weeks ago, they said "Oh we don't think we could get on the lease because of our credit, so we might not be able to do that."

My fiance and I have officially decided that after these roommates, we never want roommates again. I'm willing to pay more in rent to have a place to myself. As I said, if I really wanted to deal with another person's crap, I'd have a kid. I'm too young to be playing mommy to someone a year younger than me.

O man do i feel your pain, i just got out of something that, GET OUT while you can or just cut your ties and bail it only gets worse. Best of luck

I hate to put it like this, but you're the one letting it all happen.
You let them do stuff, and do more stuff, and you let the friend move in, and stay, and let them bring in more animals, and let them mess stuff up, and you are the lease holder.
You have to put your foot down, or put up with the behavior. If you sit there and don't correct the bahavior, it's not like they wil suddenly change. Why are you still giving him rides at 5am? Why are you putting up with it? He's treating you and your house like garbage. Anyone that figured they would "couch hop" until they found a place would have been suspect in my mind to begin with. It's called mooching. Stop it now, or be resigned to putting up with it.

You might want to give them 30 days just for your own wellbeing with your lease.

At this point if my math is right you have...

- 2 illegal tenants not on your lease
- at least what 4 or 5 ferrets
- a cat
- a dog
- snakes
- rats

All this on a lease that sounds like it covers 2 tenants with 2 cats, in a 2 bedroom rental unit.

One visit by maintenance could end up with you two having an evicition notice on your door and you'd really be in trouble trying to fight that considering you're crossing over the line on a ton of rules of the lease that you signed. I don't know about where you live but most any lease I've signed allows for maintenace to enter without 24 hours notice if there is an emergency. You could have a neighbour have a water leak, let alone something in your own unit and you've got a maintence guy in there without notice.

Personally I'd be more concerned with that happening and you ending up out on the street than irritating roommates (who are in fact putting you at even more risk on that lease).

I feel that its easier to lose a "good friend" and live comfortably in your home then to keep the "good friend" and live like :cens0r::stab::frustrate i think u should put a fork in him cuz he is done!!!:fork:

See the setup as far as the animals was perfect when we had the place to ourselves. We had the snakes and rats in the second bedroom. Because they give us 24-48 hour notice for all repairs (unless you requested the repair) we could easily move animals around as needed. If the repair was downstairs, then we'd have no problem. The cats go in the bedroom, the snakes and rats stay where they are and if they hear a cat meow (we have 3) who can say its more than the two, right. And snakes and rats don't really make much noise. If the repair was in the "animal room" then we could easily move all cages into the other bedroom in that 24-48 hour notice period and we'd have no issue. Now that we have roommates, all the animals are downstairs. So we'd have to haul all the cages up the stairs and into our bedroom and haul them back down. It would take 2-3 times as long and it would be back breaking work. (glass tanks are heavy)

So our nice little system for not getting caught with so many animals has been disrupted. Rah! We are going to talk to them either tonight or tomorrow about our issues.

:fork: <- This is how I feel.

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

See the setup as far as the animals was perfect when we had the place to ourselves. We had the snakes and rats in the second bedroom. Because they give us 24-48 hour notice for all repairs (unless you requested the repair) we could easily move animals around as needed. If the repair was downstairs, then we'd have no problem. The cats go in the bedroom, the snakes and rats stay where they are and if they hear a cat meow (we have 3) who can say its more than the two, right. And snakes and rats don't really make much noise. If the repair was in the "animal room" then we could easily move all cages into the other bedroom in that 24-48 hour notice period and we'd have no issue. Now that we have roommates, all the animals are downstairs. So we'd have to haul all the cages up the stairs and into our bedroom and haul them back down. It would take 2-3 times as long and it would be back breaking work. (glass tanks are heavy)

So our nice little system for not getting caught with so many animals has been disrupted. Rah! We are going to talk to them either tonight or tomorrow about our issues.

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Be strong, give them 30 days notice. No if and or buts about it.

NO friend should take advantage of a kind soul that way.

But neither am I a nice person, so they'd be on the road jack!

Thanks for all your words everyone! Its giving me a bit more confidence to talk with them. :)

Jay, seroiusly I'm just trying to give you some wisdom here from years of leases. If there is an emergency, a water leak, a fire in a nearby unit, or in your unit - they do not have to give 24/48 hours notice and you do not have to be home to let them in.

Check your lease and unless your landlord/tenact rules are radically different than most, there is a clause in there for the owners of the building to enter your unit for emergency reasons. In your current state of being, one emergency entrance and man you'd be in trouble I think.

Ok, this is coming from someone who also has tons of lease experience and lots of critters. Not to be rude, but I wouldn't even give them 30 days. Get them out NOW. This has gone WAY beyond a helpful hand to a friend.

A) As Joanna said, one emergency not even in your unit and you're sunk!

B) They have done more then taken advantage of you...they've walked all over you with muddy cleats!

C) Friendship is TWO sided. These people do Not sound like friends...more like moochers in paradise.

Do what's best for you, your fiance, and your animals and get them out of there ASAP! Be firm and state your reasons, both legal and personal, calmly. If they get all upset just stay firm.

Good luck hon!

Are they on the lease? Do you need them to pay rent to make yours?

If your answers is no to both of those - tell them to leave. You really shouldn't have someone that isn't on your lease living there anyways - you are just asking for trouble because if something goes really wrong they can just vamoose and you will be stuck with the consequences.

You did them a favor and they took you for granted - tell them that you really feel that they have lived there long enough and that you'd like them to find their own place. I'm not sure the situation with a landlord, but if you don't want to tell them directly tell them the landlord said that they have to go because they aren't on the lease.

I honestly can't understand with all the horrible things they are doing that you described why you would be worried about offending them or anything like that - they obviously don't care about your preferences or what you want.

Best of luck.

When you set up a flop house, expect to live in a flop house. :confused:

Thanks for all the advice. We hope to talk to them soon. It really would be nice to go back to the way things were before they showed up. The snakes could go back into the room upstairs where its nice and warm all the time. I would have one organized place to put all the animal stuff. (huge closet in that room with tons of room for organizing hides, water bowls, ect.) I could actually have my living room back. There would be space to walk! Wouldn't that be nice.

Options as I see them:

A) 30-day GTFO notice as others have suggested...

B) S³ (shoot, shovel & shut up) (uh, hypothetically speaking, of course...:bolt:)

Good luck man...hope things get back to relatively "normal" for you ASAP!

K~

Hahahahaha. You made my day. Now which to choose. :evileye:

Heres what you do.....

....You stop being the "nice guy"!

Tell them what is bothering you. If they are adults they should be treated like adults. Tell them that you have had enough of their crap, and they need to move in 30 days.

I just asked one of my roomates about the temperature. When we got home from work tonight, someone had set it to 70, when I need it to be set at 75. He said no one had moved it that he knew of. So I'm guessing the other roommate as been doing it. I know in his previous apartment, he'd set the temperature down to 65 just to make his ferrets comfortable.

Good luck dealing with them. If they are really your friends they will understand and move on. It can be hard to do but you need to step up and get them out. The stress your under is not worth the money they are giving you.

I own my own house and rent out some rooms to make ends meet and I have kicked out my fair share of friends and family.
I have a no smell policy. I have a crazy gag reflex and the slightest smell will get me going. Some days my rats even get me gagging. No smoking, no drinking, no stink one strike your gone. I had a friend move in and before her stuff was even in my house I kicked her out. Her stuff smelled like cat urine and cigarettes..

Ew, thats gross. I might end up taking a picture of the floor in their room just for evidence. Its really bad. I'm also wondering about damages to the apartment. I'm sure my carpet will be "condemned" and need to be replaced. (my cats tore up an edge near the bedroom door and their ferrets pooped everywhere in the second bedroom. How do I get them to help with the damages if they leave?

Type/print out a formal mini-lease with all the conditions you and your other room mate deem reasonable/acceptable. If they refuse to sign the lease tell them they have to go somewhere else, if they break the lease they're legally liable.

Do just like you are planning on doing. Take pictures, then SUE SUE SUE

We just asked the second roommate and he claims he hasn't touched the thermostat. Now, the thermostat is in a hallway, but its high enough on the wall that accidentally hitting it is definitely not happening. So either someone is lying or the darn house thinks its too hot and does it itself. :confused::confused::confused:

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Originally Posted by frankykeno

You might want to give them 30 days just for your own wellbeing with your lease.

At this point if my math is right you have...

- 2 illegal tenants not on your lease
- at least what 4 or 5 ferrets
- a cat
- a dog
- snakes
- rats

All this on a lease that sounds like it covers 2 tenants with 2 cats, in a 2 bedroom rental unit.

One visit by maintenance could end up with you two having an evicition notice on your door and you'd really be in trouble trying to fight that considering you're crossing over the line on a ton of rules of the lease that you signed. I don't know about where you live but most any lease I've signed allows for maintenace to enter without 24 hours notice if there is an emergency. You could have a neighbour have a water leak, let alone something in your own unit and you've got a maintence guy in there without notice.

Personally I'd be more concerned with that happening and you ending up out on the street than irritating roommates (who are in fact putting you at even more risk on that lease).

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*nods* This will happen eventually. And then all the animals and everyone involved might be homeless because of it. If they are really friends, why are they being so inconsiderate and rude? Friends aren't supposed to take advantage of you or your kindness in my opinon.

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We just asked the second roommate and he claims he hasn't touched the thermostat. Now, the thermostat is in a hallway, but its high enough on the wall that accidentally hitting it is definitely not happening. So either someone is lying or the darn house thinks its too hot and does it itself.

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Again....if they are going to wake you up at 5 am and take advantage of your kindness in general, would you expect them to tell the truth about this? Then again, I'm not there so what do I know? My kindess has been taken advantage of before and it's funny because you don't notice it until you look back on it or until it gets excessive. You've been more than kind to them...

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

We just asked the second roommate and he claims he hasn't touched the thermostat. Now, the thermostat is in a hallway, but its high enough on the wall that accidentally hitting it is definitely not happening. So either someone is lying or the darn house thinks its too hot and does it itself. :confused::confused::confused:

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put a piece of tape on it..... unless its digital then i guess this wouldnt help to much LOL

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Originally Posted by Jay_Bunny

Ew, thats gross. I might end up taking a picture of the floor in their room just for evidence. Its really bad. I'm also wondering about damages to the apartment. I'm sure my carpet will be "condemned" and need to be replaced. (my cats tore up an edge near the bedroom door and their ferrets pooped everywhere in the second bedroom. How do I get them to help with the damages if they leave?

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There is nothing you can do. They aren't even on your lease - I bet your landlord could evict you for even having them there based on your lease said when you signed it. This is why its never a good idea to let people just stay with you with nothing in writing - they aren't on the lease- legally they aren't responsible for damage to the apartment.

If they were really good friends and you had to pay for it I"m sure that they would offer to cover it - but based on what you wrote about them I wouldn't hold my breath on that happening if I was you.

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Originally Posted by SecurityStacey

There is nothing you can do. They aren't even on your lease - I bet your landlord could evict you for even having them there based on your lease said when you signed it. This is why its never a good idea to let people just stay with you with nothing in writing - they aren't on the lease- legally they aren't responsible for damage to the apartment.

If they were really good friends and you had to pay for it I"m sure that they would offer to cover it - but based on what you wrote about them I wouldn't hold my breath on that happening if I was you.

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Double that, there is nothing you can legally do to hold them accountable. Your on the lease, and you could try to get them to pay you damages, but chances are it's not worth it.

Kick them out Jay, it's not worth the trouble to let them stay.

just read through it all....ditto on everyone else's comments. They need to go. You already said they got jobs. They can be adults and find another place to live...legally.

[QUOTE=edie;875676]Thats why I don't think I would ever be able to have a roommate!

They set the AC to 65???? Its over 100 outside here in AZ and our thermostat is always set to 77-78, sometimes 79, and 77 is FREEZING! I actually have to close the vents in my room because it gets so cold.

Lol I was thinking the same thing! I set my AC to 75 -80 and it's pretty cold and in AZ it's like 105 out! Anyways I really like Nate's list idea. I lived with 3 other guys while I went to college and I can feel your pain.

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Originally Posted by envy_ld50

Lol I was thinking the same thing! I set my AC to 75 -80 and it's pretty cold and in AZ it's like 105 out! Anyways I really like Nate's list idea. I lived with 3 other guys while I went to college and I can feel your pain.

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80 degrees is hot here in canada. I set my heat to 70 in the winter lol.. i keep my office AC at 65 degrees

Ok, my towns apt/housing situation is probably different than yours, but if all else fails, find another place to move and just don't let them come with you. lol Of course I moved every year for 6 years in a row, and then finally bought a house. I made more money so I was able to find a bigger better place each year. Of course if your area has limited apts to rent it might not work.

But really, if they are really your friends they will understand and not hold it against you. Just be honest with them.
Good Luck in whatever you decide to do.