last week single

well we had the bachlor party on saturday and im still feeling the effects, 5 gallons of jungle juice will do that to you. i had a blast at my party and she did at hers. i want to know ( being i only have 4 days to back out LOL, JP), i have been with her for almost 4 years and we have lived together for 3 of those, what changes? will i say i do and all of a sudden she freak out and become some controling phyco? did anything change with the relationship that any of you had? not having second thoughts just want to know what to look forward to.

nothing changes, what you feel inside should be the same. with or without legal papers.


the words, "i want half" should strike a little more fear now though.:D


vaughn

awe crap i didnt think about that LOL wait she makes more HECK YEAH. yeah i told her nothing will change except i will have a ring that will never come off and her last name...thanks Kavmon

If it hasn't changed in four years, 3 living together, then it wont now. saying I do just lets the world hear you say your committed to each other. its natural to be nervous, but dont let that deter you. just look forward to your future together.

thanks ladydragon

IMHO, there is going to be a big change. I don't believe in divorce because a marriage is supposed to be eternal. After vows, its the long haul with no option to break up. However most people don't take marriage as serious as I do anymore. Sad how the world changes.

i found things changed dramatically for us. having that commitment, knowing the person you are with wants to REALLY be with you forever gives you a sense of 'relaxed bliss' that i've never felt before in my life.

trusting my new hubby would forever have my back, forever be there to care for me when i need him, forever be there to laugh at my jokes, forever be there to love me...

and knowing in my heart that i'm ready willing and able to be all those things to him... makes a HUGE wonderful blissful change.

so ya, things are going to change... :hug:

by the way... we are coming up on our 9th anniversary in a few days... and we love each other... deeper than ever. so... it gets better with time!

just run Nick!!!

get out of Dodge ASAP!!!

ahahhaaaaa...you know I am kidding.

yea things change...but doesn't life?

I wish you and your lady all the best!

:hug:

Now RUN!!!

:bolt:

thanks all, hoping she doesnt turn out like my soon to be monster in law...for all those that are good at genetics whats the chance HAHA. she already had her bridal portaits that i cant see but i will post many pictures soon after the wedding.

Congratulations on the upcoming wedding!!! I think that in the day to day of it things won't be a whole lot different, especially since ya'll have been living together for 3 yrs. My husband and I had lived together for about a year and a half before we got married, we just celebrated our 5th yr anniv., and yeah we have our ups and downs, but that is what marriage is all about. You get through those times Together and you become closer and stronger because of it. We don't always agree, but at the end of the day I know that he is ultimately there for me, is my lifelong partner, and my very best friend. And that's what I look forward to everyday.

Good luck Nick!!!

she already had the pics done? really? i had no idea people did it before the wedding...

hehe i've been married for 5 years and no matter what anyone says it DOES change, alot more responsibility etc, you know how all your friends would tease you about oral yada yada? and you think their joking? it's true!! it diminishes lol, the pros waaay outweigh the cons though, it's pretty cool building a life with someone, the best advice i can give to anyone getting married is, go do all the fun things you've wanted to do together, like travel,party, etc before you start a family, i have friends that had kids right away and it really strained their marriage other than that have fun! :rockon:

Congratulations :)

My husband and I have been together 4 years and have been married 3. Although we have known each other almost ten years (holy cow, time flies lol) Anyway, nothing has changed for the worst, all for the better. No one thought our marriage would last more than a year. Except my mom, there were even comments of "its only temporary". We proved everyone wrong. We are happier, and we communicate better than ever. Thats what it all boils down to, communication, honesty, and love. If you guys can hold those 3 things together you will be fine. We have been through many many hardships in our first 3 years, a finger amputated, car accident, almost losing a child, debt, and I know there was something else. We never let these things interfere with our marriage, it made it stronger because we took the blows together and stuck by each other.


Don't worry so much about the things that may or may not change, just enjoy the now and each other, and look forward to your lives together. :)

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Originally Posted by recycling goddess

she already had the pics done? really? i had no idea people did it before the wedding...

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yeah, they took over 1,000 pictures of just her. they brought her to a bed and breakfast about an hour from us because the house and land is beautiful. she took them before the wedding so we could have some blown up at the reception.

i want to thank all of you who posted so far. the advice will be taken. i know she will rule the roost so i think im going to be ok. have been drinking lots of gingerale trying to keep my stomach down if you know what i mean.

The major defining difference between marriage and being single, from an old mans point of view:
when your in a serious non married relationship, there is always the very real possibilty of you two breaking up because you did something stupid, and that's it, your done. So because it's always hanging around, your extra nice, you take cares to not be so stupid, and ruin everything, because you can lose it all very easily.

when your married, do you take the extra time like you used to? Or do you take advantage of the situation, they aint going anywhere, right?

Just an observation from a few old married men that will try to tell you to NOT get married.... I had to hear that talk everyday for almost a year. :/

My 17th anniversary is coming up in September. And we're more deeply in love and more "bestest friends" than ever. And, I truly believe the reason for this is because we've been through some REALLY hard times together....times where true love and commitment is sorely tested. Nowadays, those are the times when many folks bail on their marriages....because it's "just too hard." Never realizing the depths and incalculable value of the rewards they could have had just for sticking it through. Love tested and proven is love that will endure for a lifetime....and the peace and joy that comes from that is priceless.


Hard times will come....they do for everyone. How you choose to deal with them...together...will shape your future.

((And a little note to everyone....I'm not 100% anti-divorce...I know there are circumstances that can not, and sometimes should not, be endured or overcome by attempting to stay married. Everyone's situations are different and unique to them. But I do believe that working through even devestating relational events, when both spouses are truly committed to the work, can bring rewards never dreamed of.))

Quote:

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Originally Posted by jeffjr464

you know how all your friends would tease you about oral yada yada? and you think their joking? it's true!! it diminishes lol

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:eek:

I don't now about all that.

just sayin'

To judge someone who is divorced, especially from someone who's never even been married, is a bit judmental in it. The few people I know who are divorced, NEVER took that decision lightly and it was a very painful process. Sometimes it's better for two people to be apart.

On the other hand, I will be celebrating my 10th anniversary in 2 days. I love my husband, even when he's a major pain in my butt. We always joke that we're stuck with each other because no one else could live with either one of us. :giggle: All kidding aside, knowing that I have his support (even if everyone else thinks I'm completely nuts to drive 12 hours to go to a snake show) no matter what it is that I feel is important. I love that we can talk about anything and everything, and of course the awesome family we have created together. :love:

Congrats on your impending marriage Nick, and may you both be blessed. Everything changes, just make sure your both going in the same direction.