Extreme Rant. (about a stupid family issue)

Ok.

So.

I have been fighting with my mom and my sister for ever about this and the issue came up again yesterday.

My sister has a 6 year old pug that has never been alone in its life and has separation issues.

NOW this WHOLE issue is ALL because of this dog.

I dont have a job right now but I am currently looking and also I just got a girlfriend so my time is about to be really tied up.

ANYWAYS, I have babysat this dog AT LEAST 4 times a week. For the last 6 years.

For 5 and a half of those 6 years I have NEVER been asked or THANKED for babysitting this dog. They will just go out without asking me or anything. Now that I have a girlfriend and hopefully a job anytime now I dont have time to babysit this dog. And now I am starting to have to make plans around this dog thats not even MINE.

My sister goes to her boyfriends and stays there every weekend (without taking HER OWN DOG) so now if my mom works and shes not here I have to STAY here and babysit the thing! So what happens when I have a job and my mom and I work the same shift and she is not at home????

Yesterday, I wanted to spend the night at my girlfriends BUT I couldnt! WHY because no one would be home TODAY to babysit the dog. WHY? Because my mom worked and my sister is babysitting her boyfriends nieces and nephews! WHY CANT SHE TAKE THE DOG??

ALL this is driving me nuts!!! And if I bring it up I AM THE BAD GUY!!! If I refuse to babysit the dog I get YELLED AT AND VERBALLY ABUSED by my mother AND my sister!!!

I wish someone other then me could talk to them and knock some damn sense into them! Everyone I have talked to agrees with me! BUT I CANT DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. Its driving me to the point that I am about to flip out and get uber angry.

Like seriously am I in the wrong????

I have never once agreed to babysitting this dog. Sure I did when they first got him. But then they stopped asking me!!! I dont get a thank you when they come home. I dont get any kind of payment for it, NOTHING.

OH the thing that really peeves me off. IS that this dog does NOTHING literally NOTHING. He sleeps for 23 hours a day. Never moves from his chair and when he does its because someone is cooking in the kitchen. They dont even take this dog for a walk. I cant even remember when he went outside last besides to go to the bathroom on the apartments balcony.

/end rant.

Someone please help me.

Do you have any friends who own a burm or retic? :D

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Originally Posted by Mike41793

Do you have any friends who own a burm or retic? :D

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You are such a massive D.

LOL I love that dog. I am just sick of the whole responsibility of that dog being given to me when my sister doesnt even have a job and is on disability so she literally does nothing all day everyday.

Thanks, i get that alot. ;)

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Originally Posted by Mike41793

Do you have any friends who own a burm or retic? :D

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:8: Love it!

In all seriousness, you have two options. 1) State your case to your mom when it isn't an immediate and specific issue, and then accept her decision until you can move out (her house, her rules). 2) Leave the house whenever you want and reap the consequences (like being tossed out and screamed at more).

What type of behavior does the pug exhibit when he feels separated from the family? Is it just barking, or does he do damage to the house?

It would take some time, but you could try crate training. My moms dogs know to go to their crate (they're small and share a large crate- they were separated but prefer to be together) when she's getting ready to walk out the door. They don't have access to furniture, so they can't scratch or chew our stuff up, and they don't mess in the crate because its their personal den space. It might help to drape a blanket over half of it too, sort of like we do for snakes. It sounds odd but the dogs don't mind it at all, and they go in when they're scared or sleepy. Just don't ever punish him by putting him in his crate, because he'll try to avoid it after that.

Ok. What exactly happens to the Pug when no body is home? How severe is the anxiety?
If it's was with Lola, would it be ok? Or is human presence needed? If the anxiety is very severe, that dog should possibly be put on meds.....

Tell your sister, if she can't take responsibility for her own dog, she shouldn't own it.
It's not your dog or your responsibility. You've done the nice thing all these years, but it's still not your responsibility.

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Originally Posted by Annarose15

:8: Love it!

In all seriousness, you have two options. 1) State your case to your mom when it isn't an immediate and specific issue, and then accept her decision until you can move out (her house, her rules). 2) Leave the house whenever you want and reap the consequences (like being tossed out and screamed at more).

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1) I have brought it up when it wasnt immediate or specific and it ends in a huge yelling argument.
2) I cant do that because I am a good little boy who would feel to guilty. I would like to see her toss me out when for a whole year she wouldn't have been able to receive money from welfare without my name on the cheque.

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Originally Posted by Chkadii

What type of behavior does the pug exhibit when he feels separated from the family? Is it just barking, or does he do damage to the house?

It would take some time, but you could try crate training. My moms dogs know to go to their crate (they're small and share a large crate- they were separated but prefer to be together) when she's getting ready to walk out the door. They don't have access to furniture, so they can't scratch or chew our stuff up, and they don't mess in the crate because its their personal den space. It might help to drape a blanket over half of it too, sort of like we do for snakes. It sounds odd but the dogs don't mind it at all, and they go in when they're scared or sleepy. Just don't ever punish him by putting him in his crate, because he'll try to avoid it after that.

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The dog has LITERALLY NEVER EVER been alone before. The dog doesnt even know any commands. I doubt he can learn how to be create trained.

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Originally Posted by satomi325

Ok. What exactly happens to the Pug when no body is home? How severe is the anxiety?
If she was with Lola, would she be ok? Or is human presence needed? If the anxiety is very severe, that dog should possibly be put on meds.....

Tell your sister, if she can't take responsibility for her own dog, she shouldn't own it.
It's not your dog or your responsibility. You've done the nice thing all these years, but it's still not your responsibility.

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Like I said he has never been home alone so no one knows. But when my mom or sister leave the car when we are out shopping. Watch out this dog goes crazy.

Lola likes to bug him so I doubt it but she does snuggle with him when they sleep.

I have told my sister that and I almost got my lights knocked out.

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Originally Posted by reptiliachnids

1) I have brought it up when it wasnt immediate or specific and it ends in a huge yelling argument.
2) I cant do that because I am a good little boy who would feel to guilty. I would like to see her toss me out when for a whole year she wouldn't have been able to receive money from welfare without my name on the cheque.

The dog has LITERALLY NEVER EVER been alone before. The dog doesnt even know any commands. I doubt he can learn how to be create trained.

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1) Good little boys don't yell at their moms (even when being yelled at). Maybe reconsider your approach if it leads to yelling. I know I haven't heard your arguments to her, but the burden of communication is on the person speaking not, the person listening.

2) Open crate door, insert yippy dog, close crate door. Training complete. It isn't as though he's too strong for you/mom/sis to put him in there against his will.

If its her dog, she should deal with it or take it with her. It's her responsibility. It that doesn't work, tell her your gonna get a bark collar and a kennel. Bark collar on dog, dog in kennel, out goes Joey. Good luck.

Sent from my ADR6350 using Tapatalk 2

If the dog has never been alone, how does anyone know that it will have separation anxiety? Just because he barks, or runs around like a fruit cake when your mom/sis leave, doesn't mean he won't calm down after a few minutes and return to his chair. My opinion would be start doing trial separations. Leave him alone, drive around the block / walk around the block, come back in 10 minutes and see how he is doing. If it hasn't escalated past yipping, next time make it 20min.

My big boy has separation anxiety to a small degree. He always has to be with us when we are home, or he will start howling. When we leave the house, he will howl for a good 5 minutes, maybe 10 max. Then he goes about his business and sleeps. (Sometimes even taking advantage of our absence and sleeping on the love seat ;) )

Probably gonna get an infraction for this, but what the hey...

Man up and tell your sister to " Piss Off " or live with it. Obviously taking a Diplomatic approach has not worked. Oh and who almost knocked your lights out, your sister? Please!!!!

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Originally Posted by reptiliachnids

Like I said he has never been home alone so no one knows. But when my mom or sister leave the car when we are out shopping. Watch out this dog goes crazy.

Lola likes to bug him so I doubt it but she does snuggle with him when they sleep.

I have told my sister that and I almost got my lights knocked out.

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Try leaving him alone and see what happens. Leave the dog inside while everyone steps outside. And what happens if you leave him in a room alone? Like locking him in a bedroom. Does he freak out then too?

What a dog does in a car doesn't necessarily reflect what happens in their own home.
My dogs are generally well behaved, but put them in a car and they bark at everything.

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Originally Posted by DrDooLittle

If its her dog, she should deal with it or take it with her. It's her responsibility. It that doesn't work, tell her your gonna get a bark collar and a kennel. Bark collar on dog, dog in kennel, out goes Joey. Good luck.

Sent from my ADR6350 using Tapatalk 2

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LOL I wish it was that easy.

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Originally Posted by RoseyReps

If the dog has never been alone, how does anyone know that it will have separation anxiety? Just because he barks, or runs around like a fruit cake when your mom/sis leave, doesn't mean he won't calm down after a few minutes and return to his chair. My opinion would be start doing trial separations. Leave him alone, drive around the block / walk around the block, come back in 10 minutes and see how he is doing. If it hasn't escalated past yipping, next time make it 20min.

My big boy has separation anxiety to a small degree. He always has to be with us when we are home, or he will start howling. When we leave the house, he will howl for a good 5 minutes, maybe 10 max. Then he goes about his business and sleeps. (Sometimes even taking advantage of our absence and sleeping on the love seat ;) )

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In all seriousness I have left him alone before when I go work on my motorcycle down in the garage for a hour or so at a time. I just come up stairs and he is sleeping in his chair. I have never told anyone one this because I would rather not have my head bitten off.

Then just leave. If they get home before you, they will see him sleeping. If they still blow up in your face and get all nasty, simply say in a calm tone "I've tried reasoning with the both of you. The dog is in no harm, and perfectly fine being left alone. I am no longer willing to put my life on hold because you *sister* cannot take responsibility for your own dog. Good day. *walk out, and or brace for impact*"

If she kicks you out, so be it. Bunk with a friend for a night or two until she comes to her senses. Or, start looking for a cheap studio flat.

Just my 2¢
I hope everything works out whatever happens!

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Originally Posted by reptiliachnids

LOL I wish it was that easy.



In all seriousness I have left him alone before when I go work on my motorcycle down in the garage for a hour or so at a time. I just come up stairs and he is sleeping in his chair. I have never told anyone one this because I would rather not have my head bitten off.

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You should tell them this.
If the dog was just sleeping, then he's totally fine. He just throws a little fit at first, but some dogs do that. It's not really uncommon.
And to be honest, I don't believe that dogs should be babied. Your sister should let you try a crate or collar if he acts up.

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Originally Posted by reptiliachnids

In all seriousness I have left him alone before when I go work on my motorcycle down in the garage for a hour or so at a time. I just come up stairs and he is sleeping in his chair. I have never told anyone one this because I would rather not have my head bitten off.

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So just... leave him. If he doesn't cause a ruckus or damage to the house, I don't see the issue other than your mother and sister's comfort. If they're abusing you physically, take note of it and actually report it. It's not your animal, and it absolutely is not your responsibility. I am not optimistic about this having a happy ending for everybody, but just stick to your guns about the dog not being one of your issues. Heck, doesn't seem like he even has anxiety if he just sleeps. Big load of nothing from controlling mother and sis.

This site is full of scripts for dealing with difficult people. A lot of it focuses on dating issues and what not, but they also have people who write in about difficult family stuff, might be helpful to you. This is sounding less like a dog issue and more like mom and sis wanting their doted furry baby watched at all times so that -they- feel better. Steaming load of crap, I'm irritated with them and haven't even met them

That's why I'm a cat owner. :gj:

Train the dog. A dog can learn and be trained at any age. It's a stupid myth that older dogs can't learn new behavior. Get some book and train the dog or tell your sister to act like a decent human being and take the dog with her. It's not your job to care for the dog 100% of the time. If you need help training the dog pm me and I can help you. The dog needs to be trained, it's not healthy for a dog mentally to be suffering from anxiety and not live like a dog. What do you mean by you can't crate train the dog because it doesn't know commands? The dog doesn't know commands because your sister didn't bother teaching te dog and if she did she was using outdated/idiotic methods to do so. Work with the breed and personality of the dog. I feel pretty bad for you and the dog though.

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Originally Posted by RoseyReps

Then just leave. If they get home before you, they will see him sleeping. If they still blow up in your face and get all nasty, simply say in a calm tone "I've tried reasoning with the both of you. The dog is in no harm, and perfectly fine being left alone. I am no longer willing to put my life on hold because you *sister* cannot take responsibility for your own dog. Good day. *walk out, and or brace for impact*"

If she kicks you out, so be it. Bunk with a friend for a night or two until she comes to her senses. Or, start looking for a cheap studio flat.

Just my 2¢
I hope everything works out whatever happens!

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I 100% agree.

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Originally Posted by Valentine Pirate

So just... leave him. If he doesn't cause a ruckus or damage to the house, I don't see the issue other than your mother and sister's comfort. If they're abusing you physically, take note of it and actually report it. It's not your animal, and it absolutely is not your responsibility. I am not optimistic about this having a happy ending for everybody, but just stick to your guns about the dog not being one of your issues. Heck, doesn't seem like he even has anxiety if he just sleeps. Big load of nothing from controlling mother and sis.

This site is full of scripts for dealing with difficult people. A lot of it focuses on dating issues and what not, but they also have people who write in about difficult family stuff, might be helpful to you. This is sounding less like a dog issue and more like mom and sis wanting their doted furry baby watched at all times so that -they- feel better. Steaming load of crap, I'm irritated with them and haven't even met them

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Thanks V.P,

They have never physically done anything but they are experts at mental abuse.



Another thing is that I have my own dog. But she is a Bulldog. She is only 6 months old but she really isnt a hassle and I mean I only want to leave for a night and a day!

My bulldog has gone through training and knows a ton of commands and is crate trained. I have left her alone before and all she does is just goes and lays on the couch or plays with her toys.

But they ALWAYS use her against me. Saying that if I leave then thats me forcing them to babysit her.

I am like REALLY?! The dog is already independent. She goes out when she needs the bathroom and if she gets bored she plays with her toys. All they would have to do is feed her in the morning and at night. Thats not babysitting her at all!!!

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Originally Posted by JeRMz

That's why I'm a cat owner. :gj:

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Cats can be just as anxious or destructive as a dog.
My friend's cat used to be so wild that he would go for the jugular every time you lock eyes with him.
He would run laps around the house and pee everywhere out of boredom. He isn't feral or intact.
The cat was taken to a Petsmart puppy clicker training class and has to be walked on a leash daily. And he's been a lot better behaved since and not so neurotic.

My 8 year old Chi-Dausch-Russle got stuck in the crate recently and will be from now on. The thing poops more than he eats. He has been fine with it because both dogs sleep ALL DAY. He is also beside a friend who is in her own crate.

Crates= best thing ever.

Ouch, that is a tricky situation. Clearly your sister doesn't actually care about her dog, otherwise she would take care of it properly... That is just sad. Poor pooch!!

Maybe you could get an in home dog trainer to come and asses the behavior of both the dogs, with your mother and sister present. Maybe the trainer can convince them that the dogs don't need to be watched 24/7 and should be allowed some independence. A dog is not an infant. You should not treat a dog as if it's an infant. That is unfair to both the dog, and the human who has to "watch" the dog.

I just don't see how you can change their minds with your opinion alone. They seem to think that everything you say is wrong and they are always right. Boy are they wrong! You need some outside help. Hell I'll come over there and give them my "opinion" ;)


In the mean time, if they don't specifically ask you to watch the dog, act as if you aren't there watching it. Crate your dog when you leave and let the other dog do what it wants. When they come home wondering where you are say "I didn't agree to watch this dog, my dog is in her crate, and I have a life, kthxbye." Be as calm as possible. Don't let their yelling and screaming bother you. Don't argue with them, just go back to the facts. It is not your dog, you are not responsible for it, you are not required to watch it unless asked specifically.


This situation is ridiculous! This shouldn't even be a source of stress for you. It is just so unneeded and selfish of them, and just down right stupid. Your mother and sister are acting like 3 year olds being denied candy. :rofl:

Have them read this thread. Maybe they will snap out of their delusions.

If they don't ask you to stay with the dog, why are you staying with the dog?

It's your mom's house. I don't care if your existence caused her to get more welfare or not. If she says "This" then suck it up and deal with it or move out. You don't have a job yet, which I'm assuming means you haven't been paying any bills or rent.

When you have a renter's agreement with them, or move into your own place, you get to decide some rules. Until then, it sucks but it's part of living on someone else's dime.

(I agree, leaving a dog at home by itself isn't going to harm MOST dogs. Some freak out, but it's rare. I doubt the dog would care much if it's given a treat to chew on and people left for a while).

I'll be that guy.

Just leave. Go when you want, you're a grown :censored: adult. Tell you're sister that people like her are the reason dogs end up on HSUS commercials and either be an owner or get rid of it.

But, I get what you mean about pugs. I just hate the breed myself, and my wife's parents have one. Noisiest, whiniest waste of space there is. I've almost punted the thing, for almost getting himself killed when he tries to bite by GSD x Shiba Inu mix because food is being eaten. I also hate that in any dog. One it can shorten their life by being given tacos and hamburgers but two it creates terrible socialization habits. The little thing stares at me the entire time I eat. :( Course I'm an elitist in dogs, and unless its on the large side of medium or is a large breed, I just dont like it.

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I do want to just go lol

I really have no problem with going I give up with taking care of that dog.

But when I do go to leave I feel uber guilty about leaving my dog overnight.

Did your sister actually hit you with a closed hand(I think an open hand counts in Canada aswell)? If so, thats assault, regardless of how strong she is or not, she is grown enough to know not to lay her hands on another person. There is also no excuse whatsoever for your mother to begin yelling and shutting down the conversation when you bring this up. You have a rational complaint about a responsibility that isn't justly yours. How do you bring up this issue to them though, are you calm and collected or emotional when you bring it up? They have no excuse either way but I'm just trying to help you avoid conflict with them. Explaining to them more why it isn't your responsibility also will not work as they have both already showed that they have no respect for rationality.

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Originally Posted by OctagonGecko729

Did your sister actually hit you with a closed hand(I think an open hand counts in Canada aswell)? If so, thats assault, regardless of how strong she is or not, she is grown enough to know not to lay her hands on another person. There is also no excuse whatsoever for your mother to begin yelling and shutting down the conversation when you bring this up. You have a rational complaint about a responsibility that isn't justly yours. How do you bring up this issue to them though, are you calm and collected or emotional when you bring it up? They have no excuse either way but I'm just trying to help you avoid conflict with them. Explaining to them more why it isn't your responsibility also will not work as they have both already showed that they have no respect for rationality.

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Oh she didnt actually hit me. She threatened to "knock my F'ing Lights out if I dont shut the F up.''

And yes I have tried the calm and collected way and still they just instantly flare up.

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Originally Posted by reptiliachnids

I do want to just go lol

I really have no problem with going I give up with taking care of that dog.

But when I do go to leave I feel uber guilty about leaving my dog overnight.

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If your dog is trained well, couldn't you bring him with you to the g/f's place for a night?

Can you bring it with you?

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Originally Posted by RoseyReps

If your dog is trained well, couldn't you bring him with you to the g/f's place for a night?

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No. The reasons are private to her family so I am not going into detail.

I just really really dont want to be here. I mean my dog has allready eaten and got all her energy out of her system and is ready to crash for the night.

And my mom doesnt work tomorrow. I would be back before the evening.

I'd maintain that calm and collected approach, at the very least when things blow up and get ridiculous you know it wasn't you. This approach works really well, you can also point out to them that they are yelling when they do. Honestly though, there isn't much else I can help you with because its pretty much all psychologizing at a distance, I have no idea what kind of dialogues and family dynamic you have going on.

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Originally Posted by JeRMz

That's why I'm a cat owner. :gj:

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Ha ha! My cat has separation issues! When I'm inside she doesn't give a crap if I acknowledge her at all. In fact, I think she'd prefer I didn't. Step outside and she goes Kuh-RAY-zee!
But...I realize that she's a cat, I'll be back, and she will survive. 24/7 Dog-Nanny = Lunacy!

If I have said it once, I have said it a thousand times...
If you don't like living under your parents' rules, MOVE OUT OF THEIR HOUSE.

Seriously dude,
Move out on your own, or with some friends and don't complain about what your parents or family expect of you while you are living in their house. I got tired of having to follow someone elses rules too, and I moved out with two buddies of mine. I now live a much more stress free lifestyle, and my relationship with my family is the best it ever has been. Whining about how unfair life is doesn't do anything to help the situation. If you need to vent, sure whatever... but at the end of the day you need to change something in order to solve the problem. Don't expect your parents or siblings to be more reasonable or suddenly see things your way, don't sit their rambling on about what is or isn't fair. Realize that it is time for you to act as an adult and live your own separate life, in your own separate home, under your own separate rules. It isn't hard to do if you are willing to put a little effort into it. Get a full time job if you do not have one, jump on the classifieds sites and look for basement apartments for rent, get your butt in gear and make this whole situation a non-issue by removing yourself from it. Hell, you can even sit with your family and let them know that this is what you plan to do. Skip the "I am tired of living with you guys, you are unfair and mean and blah blah blah" and head right to "I think it is time that I get out on my own; I need my own space and I am ready to take on the responsibilities of life solo". They may even be willing to help you find your new place, or give you the much needed encouragement to get yourself out into the world.

Anyways, this is simply friendly advice from a guy who got tired of living with his parents as well.

P.s. I don't feel sorry for you, and I honestly think you are being a bit of a wuss about this. MAN UP! You are stealing your own dignity away from yourself by being childish; you are better than that dude...

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Originally Posted by TJ_Burton

If I have said it once, I have said it a thousand times...
If you don't like living under your parents' rules, MOVE OUT OF THEIR HOUSE.

Seriously dude,
Move out on your own, or with some friends and don't complain about what your parents or family expect of you while you are living in their house. I got tired of having to follow someone elses rules too, and I moved out with two buddies of mine. I now live a much more stress free lifestyle, and my relationship with my family is the best it ever has been. Whining about how unfair life is doesn't do anything to help the situation. If you need to vent, sure whatever... but at the end of the day you need to change something in order to solve the problem. Don't expect your parents or siblings to be more reasonable or suddenly see things your way, don't sit their rambling on about what is or isn't fair. Realize that it is time for you to act as an adult and live your own separate life, in your own separate home, under your own separate rules. It isn't hard to do if you are willing to put a little effort into it. Get a full time job if you do not have one, jump on the classifieds sites and look for basement apartments for rent, get your butt in gear and make this whole situation a non-issue by removing yourself from it. Hell, you can even sit with your family and let them know that this is what you plan to do. Skip the "I am tired of living with you guys, you are unfair and mean and blah blah blah" and head right to "I think it is time that I get out on my own; I need my own space and I am ready to take on the responsibilities of life solo". They may even be willing to help you find your new place, or give you the much needed encouragement to get yourself out into the world.

Anyways, this is simply friendly advice from a guy who got tired of living with his parents as well.

P.s. I don't feel sorry for you, and I honestly think you are being a bit of a wuss about this. MAN UP! You are stealing your own dignity away from yourself by being childish; you are better than that dude...

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^ THIS.

Exactly what I would have said, only better.

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Originally Posted by reptiliachnids

I do want to just go lol

I really have no problem with going I give up with taking care of that dog.

But when I do go to leave I feel uber guilty about leaving my dog overnight.

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Wait, so is this actually about your sisters dog? It sounds more like your situation with YOUR (not accusatory- i don't have italics available for a less scary emphasis) dog that is keeping you home.

Do you think your family would hurt your dog? Or are you just feeling guilty that you'd be "abandoning" (as ridiculous as it sounds) your sister's dog while expecting them to watch your pooch?

If you're worried about your puppy, put her in a kennel overnight. There are doggy daycare places that even have webcams set up so you can check on your dogs. I think some big petstore chains (petco & petsmart) have boarding programs too. You wanted her, and she is your responsibility. But your sisters dog isn't. You said you'd be busy soon anyway (don't remember if its with work or school) so eventually it won't be your problem anyway. Your mom might even get tired of staying home 24/7 while you and your sister are unavailable and leave the dog home alone after all.

Honestly, this is just one of increasingly worse "welcome to adulthood" situations. More often than not you don't get to do what you'd rather be doing because of previous/more important obligations. This time it's dogs keeping you home. Next time it'll be because rent's due and you're too broke. Then it'll be because you have kids and ran out of vacation days at work. It sucks, but what are you going to do?

If your girlfriend is worthwhile she'll understand that you have responsibilities to attend to. As you get older, women find that maturity attractive. They see you helping your family and know that when you have a family of your own you'll step up to the plate and handle things even if its not ideal.

Best of luck!

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Originally Posted by TJ_Burton

P.s. I don't feel sorry for you, and I honestly think you are being a bit of a wuss about this. MAN UP! ..

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Exactly. It takes two to create a rug- the one walking, and the one walked on. If you, as they say 'Just say no' the problem with come to rest right where it should, on the owner of the dog.

I'd agree with TJ, with the exception that I would not recommend you tell them because I guarantee based off what you've said here that they will go ape**** on you and be completely unpredictable. If its worth it to you, gather some funds and get away from folks that are incapable of bringing rationality to conflicts.

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Originally Posted by OctagonGecko729

I'd agree with TJ, with the exception that I would not recommend you tell them because I guarantee based off what you've said here that they will go ape**** on you and be completely unpredictable. If its worth it to you, gather some funds and get away from folks that are incapable of bringing rationality to conflicts.

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I have a feeling that there is a lot more to this scenario than what is being shown to us; keep that in mind. Considering the lack of maturity at the heart of this thread, I doubt the family is comprised of a bunch of completely unreasonable people who expect too much from a son that lives in their home. It would be foolish to assume you've learned any hard truths about the OP's family in this thread considering you are getting a single biased side of the story.

The smart and responsible thing to do would be to have a civil conversation with your family and make them aware of your intentions. If you do not care to keep ties with your family, sure you can blind side them and leave without any notice, but realize how that looks to them.

A lot has already been said but I would like to weigh in here as well, so here goes:

Before this thread I believed that you were legally an adult, however if your mother receives assitance from either the province or the federal government for you that I believe that would make you a minor. As crappy as it is, if you are a minor and your parent tells you that you can't leave the house then you can't leave the house. You physically could get up and leave, but at that point in time your parents could report you as a runaway, which would open up a whole other can of worms. If you are legally an adult, then you seriously need to man up and stand up for yourself. If someone that you live with, and a family memeber at that, threatens you with physical violence for not watching their dog, then you have serious issues. From the one side of the story that we have it would appear that your mother and sister are verbally abusive, which may be why you are afraid to or don't think that you could leave. Why would you feel guilty about getting yourself out of an abusive situation. I would say that your response is actually typical of the victim of abuse.

The other thing that I would like to address is the financial situation in the house. You have quite a few snakes, and there is no way that you have enough rats to feed them all based solely off of your signature block. You also have a new dog that has to eat, and both getting and feeding all of your pets cost money. You have said that you don't have a job but you seem to have quite a few pets that aren't cheap, not to mention a vehicle which needs gas and regular maintenance. Would you mind me asking who pays for all of these things with you not getting a paycheck? I seriously hope that it isn't your mother, as I am sure that the taxpayers that send her that welfare check every month (or how ever often she receives it) wouldn't appreciate it being spent on wants and not necessities (if she can afford pet snakes then she can afford her own groceries kind of thing). If it is her, however, it would seem that you throwing such a huge stink about watching a dog is actually quite a bit selfish. Does it need to be watched? No, but if your mother asks you to while she (and taxpayers) are providing you with a car, a roof over your head and food in your belly, then man up and do it.

Is there a reason why your girlfriend can't come and stay the night at your place? It seems like that would put the issue here to rest, at least until you get a job.

Hopefully some of this will help you mak a decision about what to do. If all else fails make the dog a turkey cutlet and anti-freeze sandwhich. Works every time! LOL ;)

Your mom and sister both sound like terribly immature people. I feel bad for you, and I hope their lifestyles, personalities, and behaviors haven't rubbed off on you.

Most family problems can be solved by the following:

Get a job. Take responsibility. Become independent.