The Chicken Epiphany......

I wrote this story a few years ago for English class and thought I'd share it here........enjoy!

"The Chicken Epiphany"-by Me

The story begins in Tiawana, Mexico in the rural part of the town. This is where we find our subject: Leviticus Hornwell, Esquire-a porr but kind-hearted gardener and a part-time voo-doo doctor. He resides in a small seven-story mansion all by himself. His self-owned business of gardening helps support his constant trips to the supermarket for ceran wrap.
On the weekend, however, he leads the life of a local voo-doo doctor, doing the usual voo-doo stuff: shrinking heads, casting spells on senior citizens and the occasional Jewish wedding gig. He was very highly regarded in his town and everyone loved it when he would play tricks on them by killing them.
One day, Leviticus was in the process of tilling his garden when suddenly, he heard a great blast sound that may have been either Phil Collins or a grandfather clock. He looked around and out of his sprinkler came a bright light! He stared in wonder and amazement as a figure approached him out of the light.....was it God? NO....it was Colonel Sanders, the chicken mogul!
Col. Sanders said to him in a voice that strongly suggested he has been sucking helium balloons for about 12 years, "Leviticus Hornwell! I have a mission for you!"
"I want you to go into the world and decapitate all the chickens , then, using you powers of voo-doo, force them to kill Al Roker, for I greatly dislike his jowels!!!"
Leviticus replied, "But what is the reason behind all of this, Lord Sanders?!?!?"
"Come here, Leviticus," ordered the Colonel. Leviticus took a step toward him.
"CLOSER!" ordered Mr. Sanders. Leviticus then got very close to him and a stream of water squirted out of the spinkler right into his.................................EYES!!!!!!
"Do my bidding or you shall reap the consequences, infidel!!!!!" screamed Colonel Sanders.
And as quickly as he had arrived, the King of Clogged Arteries was gone. Leviticus was left shocked and stunned. So, taking Col. Sanders' orders, he went into the world and decapitated all of the chickens and organized his army and marched them into New York to kill Al roker! Once they had arrived, he called to his minions, "Kill that fat dude!"
The chickens swarmed to attack Al, but missed and hit a camera guy........but it was still freakin AWESOME.

THE END.

Al Roker is an idiot

Puff puff, pass

Steelsack, log in boy!

How'd you know who it is? :shock:

I'm an admin, please.

So what...

:lol::mrgreen::lol:

I'm all knowing here. I even know about the two times you posted as Guest.

LOL.. That was on accident! I didn't know it didn't "remember me". That would be cool to be like god on a forum heheh... :twisted:

Not really. But it comes in handy.

LOL! nice tale! previous post wasn't me but it was my computer.....people visiting and all
Ballkingdom sees all! Big brotha!

No, when people post as guests I look at the ip, and it instantly pulls up any post ever made by that particular IP. And it pulled up your screen name.

It's perfect for banning trolls, catching people doing bad stuff. It just brought up your sn :) No worries, just curious to see who ya were.

So, how many users are on your computer?

Normally just me and my wife and son. Got a few family menbers in from out of town for the holidays. They were just checking out my system........told them this was a cool site, so they were looking at photo albums and reading a couple forums.........
Good to know you run a tight ship :wink:

You make it seem like I went out on a search to find out who you were :) I hit a button and it gave me the info, lol.

Not at all............but now I'm beginning to wonder......(jk)

john, youre so nosey.

*gives up on life*

ah that was the highlight of my night.

Will is John stalking you again?
I thought that last restraining order was going to work.
Rusty