Embarrassing Stories Lets Hear Them !!!!!!!!!

I was just telling a few people I work with my most embarrassing story so I figured I would share it hear as well and hopefully hear some worse lol.
Note before reading : My wife doesn't cook, I do all the cooking.

So me and my wife go shopping every Sunday morning. About 6 months ago we went about our usual Sunday morning routine and were shopping for about 40 min or so and made our way to the meat section. So I happen to look over and I see my wife looking at the meat like she knew what she was even looking at. So I walk up behind her and give her a tap on the tush and say "Rach what the hell are looking at you know you cant cook "............. Well it wasn't my wife . Yupp I tapped another woman's butt and her boyfriend was right there as well ....Cracking up laughing because I don't know who was more shocked me or her. I never studdered soo much in my life "I I I I 'm soo sososorry lady, your wearing the ssssame cloths as my wife " hahahahahaha . I take a look over and my wife has that stare that says" I could walk away right now and pretend I dont even know him ". BUT in my defense she had the same build and wearing the same exact cloths and the same hair style. Needless to say I do not touch the tushy in public until I get visual facial confirmation.

So there is mine , I know you all have them so lets hear them !!!!!! Well read them lol

after I stop laughing Ill one.

So, im still laughing at your story because that's something I would do.

One time my wife and I went to San Antonio to the mall. While she was in line to use the atm, I decided to go look in the store next to the atm. I walk in and get a face full of glass door. That sucker was clean I didn't even see it. That was pretty embarrassing.

Polish..... that has to be the funniest story!!!!

Im blonde...so the stories are seriously NEVER ENDING!! Really I could write a book....

However last Saturday I was with my son....my hubby and my nephew. I don't know what in the world my hubby and nephew were talking about but we parked the car in the drive way and got out. My husband said something about a Mom I'd like to......and I turned around while walking and bam....face first into the garage door. Pretty much just like new years when I ran into the sliding glass door....ugh.

There was also the time I was talking on the cell....driving and I look at my passenger and was frantic as to where my cell phone was...even pulled over and put my call on hold. The whole time she was looking at me like I was an alien.....LOL

Like I said...may many blonde moments.

my most embarrassing moment was wail back when i was 12 at my b-day party. i should start out by saying whenever im super stressed ( which given my lifestyle i usually am ),i have insomnia. So at my party i did this thing were i woke up cuz i had just recovered from a major stresser, but i was like half asleep i got out of my pull out bed and walked upstairs stared at the kitchen table and decided it would make a nice place to sleep. not sure why i did that but when i woke up there were many curios children staring at me.:rolleye2:

This one is bad... I was going to culinary school years ago. I was on the way into the bathroom and a man walked right into the bathroom in front of me. I said, "excuse me sir,this is the woman's restroom". "He" turned around and said "I am a woman". I was so mortified and I had to spend a whole semester in the same class as this lady. Goes to show that you can not always tell. Foot in mouth!

When I was at my first college about 5 years ago in a small hicktown there was a migrating prank between all my friends.

Every once in a while a big piece of ice (usually in a very *cough*adult*cough* shape, with an obvious wrapper) would be moved from freezer to freezer. Also the wrapper had to be signed with something silly.
Only rule was a person had to add a #2 to the migration if there was no more room to write on the 1st.

This continued for about 4 months...

Well I got the whole collection the day before finals and I had to add #14...as organized as I am I just dumped them into an old popsicle box. Later I snuck them over to a guyfriend's place, assuming he had be quietly educated in the game....:rolleyes:

3 days later during a family thanksgiving (which I was asked to join) out comes HIS GRANDMOTHER asking "_____, how do you open this?" in front of the whole family... who all look like :O . This is when I realized no one had clued him in. Uhhhhhh ohhhhhhhh

Realizing I was in a heap of trouble I fessed up to the whole family explaining the game so my buddy wouldn't get killed. Thankfully everyone laughed to tears once they began reading the sayings on them.

Unfortunately, someone in his family is keeping up the game because a 12 pack of them ended up in his freezer last month during his wedding, which his new wife found...

Hahahaha these are all great

@JAYGEE ... On Sunday, me my sister and my wife were leaving the casino that had a HUGE automatic glass rotating door (I'm sure you all know what I mean ) and as we were walking around it I thought it had got to the point where we exit and I walked right into the glass hahahaha I think my wife peed herself because she said she knew I was going to walk into it.

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Originally Posted by PolishPython

I was just telling a few people I work with my most embarrassing story so I figured I would share it hear as well and hopefully hear some worse lol.
Note before reading : My wife doesn't cook, I do all the cooking.

So me and my wife go shopping every Sunday morning. About 6 months ago we went about our usual Sunday morning routine and were shopping for about 40 min or so and made our way to the meat section. So I happen to look over and I see my wife looking at the meat like she knew what she was even looking at. So I walk up behind her and give her a tap on the tush and say "Rach what the hell are looking at you know you cant cook "............. Well it wasn't my wife . Yupp I tapped another woman's butt and her boyfriend was right there as well ....Cracking up laughing because I don't know who was more shocked me or her. I never studdered soo much in my life "I I I I 'm soo sososorry lady, your wearing the ssssame cloths as my wife " hahahahahaha . I take a look over and my wife has that stare that says" I could walk away right now and pretend I dont even know him ". BUT in my defense she had the same build and wearing the same exact cloths and the same hair style. Needless to say I do not touch the tushy in public until I get visual facial confirmation.

So there is mine , I know you all have them so lets hear them !!!!!! Well read them lol

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Oh My gosh! This is the funniest story ever! I was LMAO and ROFL!! Luckily this lady's boyfriend didn't knock you out for grabbing the wrong tush!

Its very funny looking back on it but when it happened it really wasnt lol

I have never been one to embarrasse easy ask anyone who knows me. How ever years ago I was riding to New Orleans with a big group of friends. Myself, my girlfriend and another girl was in the back seat. Being that it was rather cold we were all bundled up under a blanket. Well about half way down I figured I would use this time to flirt a little with my girl. So I spent the next hour and a half tickling her knee, rubbing her thigh, nothing over pg13..Yea well we pull up to fill up with fuel everyone announces their getting out to stretch their legs. Val say's "yea I need to too, Oh and Ed that's my knee".. Yep spent the last 90 minutes rubbing the wrong knee, and she never said a word..

Only time I've turned blood red in my life..

Ok that and when Robin decided to tell the waitress at Carabba's I said she smelled good..but she did..there wasn't a guy at the table that wasn't trying to smell her after I said that..

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Originally Posted by BPelizabeth

Polish..... that has to be the funniest story!!!!

Im blonde...so the stories are seriously NEVER ENDING!! Really I could write a book....

However last Saturday I was with my son....my hubby and my nephew. I don't know what in the world my hubby and nephew were talking about but we parked the car in the drive way and got out. My husband said something about a Mom I'd like to......and I turned around while walking and bam....face first into the garage door. Pretty much just like new years when I ran into the sliding glass door....ugh.

There was also the time I was talking on the cell....driving and I look at my passenger and was frantic as to where my cell phone was...even pulled over and put my call on hold. The whole time she was looking at me like I was an alien.....LOL

Like I said...may many blonde moments.

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Please, I beg you...write a book. I would buy it and so would a million others.

Take Care!
Jim Smith

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Originally Posted by PolishPython

@JAYGEE ... On Sunday, me my sister and my wife were leaving the casino that had a HUGE automatic glass rotating door (I'm sure you all know what I mean ) and as we were walking around it I thought it had got to the point where we exit and I walked right into the glass hahahaha I think my wife peed herself because she said she knew I was going to walk into it.

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:rofl:

I have a couple. First one is about my parents, not me.
Mom and Dad went to the bank one time. According to dad, the teller at the bank, who was always a little flirty with everyone, looked at him and said, "Oh hi Mr. Wolfson! this must be your daughter."
LOL, it was my mom, who was 37 at the time. It made my dad feel old and my mom feel really young. :D The lady was pretty embarrassed when my dad said, "Nope, this is my wife."
One time my family and I were traveling to LA, and halfway there we stopped at a rest stop to use the bathroom. My little brother was about 3 at the time and still needed my mom to take him in the bathroom to help him out. Well, so my mom starts walking up to the bathroom with J, my little bro, and my sister and I are telling her, "Mom, Mom, wait, Mom, stop--"
she keeps going, and opens the door, and it is to the men's bathroom, where a guy was taking a leak in one of the upright urinal things. LOL, she turned red and ran to the other side, and my sister and I were snorting about how she didn't listen to us.
One time we were at my Aunt's in LA, and she is a clean freak with a very expensive house. A speck of dirt on the floor probably cost her 3.00$ because she would have it polished and cleaned and placed artistically to be appealing to the eye.
So in the same day, both my little brother and sister accidentally ran into the screen door on the back door at different times. By the end of the day it was broken down the middle. :(

I went to a children's waterpark one day because I was very bored and it was hot outside. Went on the slide and landed in the crowded pool, where a little boy's foot pulled my bikini top up and almost off all the way. >.< Luckily I went under the water and was able to pull it back on before any adults took their kids and left. LOL
I have so many more. My family is a bunch of nut jobs hahaha

You know how when someone does something really exceptional and your completely shocked that they did it? Ok.... here goes:oops:

Back at this place I use to work at we manufactured Telecommunication Equipment. Stuff you see guys out on powerlines holding. Some of it is small and some of it is pretty big and heavy.

Well we had this uhhh slightly older woman who worked out on the manufacturing floor. She was usually pretty quiet but she had a rough neck type demeanor. And... well.....ummmmm She also had a beard...lol

So one morning I am sitting at my desk and I watch her walk over to the cart and throw two units on her shoulders each weighing around 40 pounds a pop.... I am stunned and amazed and before I know it I blirted out the unthinkable....

"HOLY CRAP! YOUR A BEAST!!"

As soon as I said it I was mortified:O She turned around and gave me this glare as I attempted an embarrasing smile :oops: She never spoke to me again the 2 more years I ended up working there.....

Yeah well my buddies to this day who were there still never let me live that down.

I don't embarrass easily but I had some explaining to do to some of my coworkers one day. The breeder I got my Papillon Panini from came into the hospital with his boy friend one day with my girls father and a couple of other dogs for vacs. I had seen his boyfriend before but never really met him or talked to him like that.

Any way so we're talking and I'm fussing over the dogs for a cool min before getting back to work. Then one of my coworkers comes over and asks who is that,.. he's been in before looking for me when I was off? My minds on the dog not the guy,.. so my response "My babies daddy". The whole lobby got quiet and it didn't click until I questioned what she meant, looked up, saw every ones faces including his boyfriends and realized what she actually meant.

So awkward to say the least but,.. yeah. I meant the dog is Panini, my puppy,.. my babies daddy.

^^^ hahahaha

ok well here's one from me...
when i was little i had a fairly loud voice due to my lack of control over it cuz of my hearing impairment. my mom told me that we were in line in a store to pay for some stuff and i tugged on her shirt to get her attention. she turned to me and i motioned for her to bend down so i could "whisper" something to her. she bent down and i proceeded to ask "why is that lady fat?" motioning to a rather,um, large lady behind us.
well, you can pretty much guess that my whisper ended up being a near shout and the poor woman behind us heard every word of it.
my mom said she wanted to grab me and run out cuz the lady looked like she was gonna "squash us both".
i of course do not remember any of this but my mom said she gave me a really good earful the whole way home about how loud my voice is.

another one that pertains to kids and their lack of control of what they say...

we were having a b-day party for our son a few years back when we still lived in california. my daughter's best friend and her mom & uncle were among the guests and my bf was playing with all the kids. my daughter made some kind of playful comment about his size (he's 6' 2" & a little over 300 lbs) and we reminded her that it's not nice to say things like that. she apologized and all was good.
then, her best friend, in her own excitement during the playing, blurted out
"mike, your FAT!"
poor guy...he responded "yeah, i know. i gotta work on that." and called it quits with the playing. daughter's best friend got a very stern scolding on the spot and was told to apologize, in which she did.
the party mood kinda fizzled a bit after that and we moved on to the presents and then ended the party a little earlier then we'd wanted to.
kinda hard to feel festive when the kids are blindly blurting things out.

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Originally Posted by mommanessy247

ok well here's one from me...
when i was little i had a fairly loud voice due to my lack of control over it cuz of my hearing impairment. my mom told me that we were in line in a store to pay for some stuff and i tugged on her shirt to get her attention. she turned to me and i motioned for her to bend down so i could "whisper" something to her. she bent down and i proceeded to ask "why is that lady fat?" motioning to a rather,um, large lady behind us.
well, you can pretty much guess that my whisper ended up being a near shout and the poor woman behind us heard every word of it.
my mom said she wanted to grab me and run out cuz the lady looked like she was gonna "squash us both".
i of course do not remember any of this but my mom said she gave me a really good earful the whole way home about how loud my voice is.

another one that pertains to kids and their lack of control of what they say...

we were having a b-day party for our son a few years back when we still lived in california. my daughter's best friend and her mom & uncle were among the guests and my bf was playing with all the kids. my daughter made some kind of playful comment about his size (he's 6' 2" & a little over 300 lbs) and we reminded her that it's not nice to say things like that. she apologized and all was good.
then, her best friend, in her own excitement during the playing, blurted out
"mike, your FAT!"
poor guy...he responded "yeah, i know. i gotta work on that." and called it quits with the playing. daughter's best friend got a very stern scolding on the spot and was told to apologize, in which she did.
the party mood kinda fizzled a bit after that and we moved on to the presents and then ended the party a little earlier then we'd wanted to.
kinda hard to feel festive when the kids are blindly blurting things out.

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I always find it kind of sad that kids lose their innocence so fast. The irony about this is that when kids say this, they arent judging the person at all. We say nothing, but we are all constantly judging :(.

This one is bad. But very similar to the o.p.'s story.

I was at a reptile show (2008 or 2009 Orlando FIRE I think) and I was walking with my boyfriend. We were both kinda side walking while looking at a couple of tables of frogs and other interesting stuff. I was focusing on the table but I got the feeling that he has stopped walking and I was leaving him behind (one of his major pet peeves). So I side step back a couple steps never taking my eyes off the table and I see him right next to me out of the corner of my eye. So I reach over rub my hand across his shoulders down his back and stop on his rear. I gave it the normal little pat and realize that it feels really different. I turn in mid sentence-hand still on his tush,( I can't remember what I was saying to him) and realize that I am feeling up a complete stranger!!! And the poor guy was staring at me with his mouth wide open and both hands up like I was sticking him up! I kinda freaked at that point and started stuttering really loud "I'm so so so so so sorry! I thought you where someone else!" Turn and literally run away. OMG it was bad. So I finally calm down enough to find Art. He was 2 isles away talking to Michael Cole. When I told them both what happened I thought they were going to wet them selves. Mike still teases me about standing next to me at a reptile show.:rolleyes:

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Originally Posted by kellysballs

This one is bad. But very similar to the o.p.'s story.

I was at a reptile show (2008 or 2009 Orlando FIRE I think) and I was walking with my boyfriend. We were both kinda side walking while looking at a couple of tables of frogs and other interesting stuff. I was focusing on the table but I got the feeling that he has stopped walking and I was leaving him behind (one of his major pet peeves). So I side step back a couple steps never taking my eyes off the table and I see him right next to me out of the corner of my eye. So I reach over rub my hand across his shoulders down his back and stop on his rear. I gave it the normal little pat and realize that it feels really different. I turn in mid sentence-hand still on his tush,( I can't remember what I was saying to him) and realize that I am feeling up a complete stranger!!! And the poor guy was staring at me with his mouth wide open and both hands up like I was sticking him up! I kinda freaked at that point and started stuttering really loud "I'm so so so so so sorry! I thought you where someone else!" Turn and literally run away. OMG it was bad. So I finally calm down enough to find Art. He was 2 isles away talking to Michael Cole. When I told them both what happened I thought they were going to wet them selves. Mike still teases me about standing next to me at a reptile show.:rolleyes:

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I'm not alone hahahaha

I work in a art collage in the photography department, as a prof. I do not embarrass easily I look at photos of everything you can think of and am not bothered by it at all.


I am very out going, and while standing in grocery store line, I started up a conversation with the 30 something woman standing behind me in line. I have a very good memory for faces and I knew I had met her someplace before. After a moment we started 'where did I meet you' she was somewhat baffled, but I knew, I had met her so I pressed on. I finally figured she must be one of the students, but know she said she wasn't but her boyfriend just finished a night class there.

I had a flash of sitting in my office and having a con-ed student ask if he could show me a couple of prints that he was printing for his wife and he wanted them to be perfect. They were photographs of a very lovely 30 something woman on a floor in the sun nude. Really very beautiful images, over the next few hours he worked on printing them and asking for way to improve them.

I look up into the woman in front of my eyes and had that feeling of heat and knew I was turing beat red, she must have figured it out at about the same moment and also turned red. I tried to cover and say gee that is odd maybe I am mistaken... She commented on her anniversary gift her husband had given her 2 framed photographs and that one of the profs had been a great help printing them.

I have never been more embarrassed before or since.

I developed film for 3 years at a Eckerds. I have moments like the above as well. We were not allowed to print pornography, but we could print nudity since it can be considered Art. It is very embarrassing to explain to someone with a line behind them why the one picture can be printed but those others of her and her friends couldn't be.:O

Hahahaha these are great ...... Don't be shy let's go !!!