i have some disturbing news

my friend wanted a bp very badly. he would always come over my house & hold my bp, he fell in love with it. so he decided to get one. his girlfriend that he lives with is terrified of snakes. but she finally said "ok go ahead & get it". she allowed him to get it even though she didnt want him to AT ALL. once he got it he had to feed it in 2 days because the pet shop had the snake for a month & hadnt fed it... (wtf) but anyways, his girlfriend MADE him feed the bp outside because she was scared of the little mouse. the snake ate & my friend was so happy, he called me & he was very excited the snake ate with no problems. the next day i called him & he answered the phone like "its all bad, very bad news." he told me he came home from work & the snake was not in the tank.... his girlfriend told him "im sorry but i had to get rid of that snake, i wasnt feelin it at all. i hate that thing so i got rid of it". he doesnt know if she killed it or let it looce, but that snake is gone. :tears:

woooowwwww...
Thats quite a lack of respect for both the animal and her boyfriend.
IMO he probably shouldn't have got one with her being that adverse to the animal, but I'd definitely take issue with someone giving me the go ahead and then getting rid of the animal while I was gone.

That is seriously messed up. If Steve were to get rid of our snakes, he'd end up castrated and single. But he knows better. Lol. I'm so sorry for your friend's loss.

yea he says he wants to get his own apt now, but idk, they've been together for a while, she is VERY disrespectful for that

First, I would find out from the girlfriend if she let it loose or if she simply gave it away/sold it. Letting it loose in the wild is not only illegal, but also animal cruelty in my book.

Also, tell your friend that while he is living with his girlfriend, he needs to not have reptiles. Bringing reptiles into a home where one person is clearly uneasy about it and only gives in because she was badgered or she only wanted to make the other person happy is not a good mix. Things like this happen and it is the animal that suffers. If she comes around and starts to like reptiles, that's great and he can get another. But if stuff like this is going to happen, it is in the best interest of everyone if he didn't get reptiles.

wow...sounds to me like he needs to get rid of that witch with a capital B and quick. AFTER she tells him wtf she did with his snake

Dont think she would be my girlfriend anymore, my partner was terrified of snakes when I first got them but he got over it and loves them as much as I do I dont understand the irrational fear some people have, especially when it would make them harm an innocent animal

Kick her to the curb, man. It's one thing to ask your partner to re-home a pet that you can't live with, but it's another thing entirely to dispose of their property without asking, and then refuse to say what you did with it. When it's a living animal, that's an entirely new world of wrong.

No one needs someone who treats them (or other living things) in that fashion.

wow that sucks big time.
on the note of having reptiles when the partner doesnt like 'em...
my bf doesnt like snakes but he's lettin' me have one cuz he knows better then to tell me no, lol. he's definitely not keen on the idea of me having the 3 (possibly 4) that i hope to have someday. but again he knows how i get when i really, really want something...and he loves me so he's not gonna make me fight my arse off for it. i'm blessed in alot of ways, i guess.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by tiny_tiger60978

wow...sounds to me like he needs to get rid of that witch with a capital B and quick. AFTER she tells him wtf she did with his snake

---

This was my first response, how messed up in so many ways :mad:

A respectful, caring and loving partner TALKS to their significant other about problems. Not take it upon themselves to do something like that.

My fiance is terrified of snakes. He lives with 9 of them. He does that because he loves me and respects what I love. we do have some other arrangements that make the situation good for both of us.

If i were him, i would be having a serious conversation with her about their future plans. Its one thing for her to not feel comfortable with an animal she gave him permission to get. Its another thing entirely to disrespect him so much by doing what she did.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by snakesRkewl

This was my first response, how messed up in so many ways :mad:

---

Agreed.

In his defense, he brought the snake home after she okay'd it. She shouldn't have just gotten rid of it without consulting him. How hard is it to be honest, sit him down and say "I know I said it was okay for you to have this snake, but I am feeling really uneasy about it"?

That just shows the lack of respect she has for him if she's selfish enough to get rid of a pet that he really wanted and likes, especially after she gave approval. This girl is not a keeper.

That is awful. Did he ever find out what she did with his snake?
I'd probably break up with her, I mean if my boyfriend just got rid of one of my animals... I'd be livid. I didn't talk to my parents for weeks when they put my horse down with out telling me, but those are my parents. I don't think any guy could get away with something like that. No matter how long we had been together. So he shouldn't let her get away with it either.
As for his own place, can he afford it? Do you have any friends looking for roommates? I hope he finds out what she did with the snake. If only for peace of mind.

Whether or not he kicks her to the curb because of this, I 100% guarantee you that they are not going to make it together.

If they stay together, they will both be miserable.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by king216

my friend wanted a bp very badly. he would always come over my house & hold my bp, he fell in love with it. so he decided to get one. his girlfriend that he lives with is terrified of snakes. but she finally said "ok go ahead & get it". she allowed him to get it even though she didnt want him to AT ALL. once he got it he had to feed it in 2 days because the pet shop had the snake for a month & hadnt fed it... (wtf) but anyways, his girlfriend MADE him feed the bp outside because she was scared of the little mouse. the snake ate & my friend was so happy, he called me & he was very excited the snake ate with no problems. the next day i called him & he answered the phone like "its all bad, very bad news." he told me he came home from work & the snake was not in the tank.... his girlfriend told him "im sorry but i had to get rid of that snake, i wasnt feelin it at all. i hate that thing so i got rid of it". he doesnt know if she killed it or let it looce, but that snake is gone. :tears:

---

Not a good sign of a "healthy relationship" Your friend needs to cut his losses and kick her to the curb. Either that or just give up herping while she is in his life. His choice.

#1 she's an animal abuser UNLESS she found it a good home with a keeper who knows what they're doing.
#2 she's a liar for saying it was okay for him to get it, when it obviously was not.
#3 she doesn't see anything wrong with what she did.

If he stays with her, and thinks it's fine, he's got almost as many issues as she does.

Lastly, he should not have gotten the snake knowing she felt that way, whether she said it was okay or not. When she made him take it outside to feed it, that should have clued him in as well.

But of course, we have only one side of the story, through a 3rd party, so no telling what actually happened either. But from the story as told, I wouldn't want to be around either of those two, and especially not around her!

There's something wrong with this story...

I was in the same boat as the g/f. My husband has been wanting a snake since before we got married and I say no. I'm deathly scared of them. All my family (that includes aunt and uncles and cousins) except for one brother does not go into my house anymore. I would have been one of them. But, after 10 years of marriage, I finally relented. So, I can understand how the g/f felt.

BUT... what is wrong with this story... he comes home and the snake is gone. How did THAT happen? Being deathly scared of snakes, I wouldn't have had the courage to go NEAR the enclosure let alone OPEN it. If that was me and I changed my mind (which I can imagine completely happening), I would stay at a friend's for a while until we figure things out.

Or I would call my husband and tell him I can't handle it and to please move the snake somewhere out of the house. Or, if I was a real mean witch, I would call a friend to get rid of it...

So, since we know the husband didn't know anything about it, then there's gotta be an accomplice, unless the story we got is flawed.

Intriguing mystery, this one.

That is a horrible story, he needs to threaten her with a call to the police, as what she did is illegal for multiple reasons, thats theft, animal cruelty, and possibly release of a non native species, she could go to jail for that! Maybe after he threatens her with legal action she will admit what she actually did with it...

If my girlfriend did this I would go absolutely ballistic! I would probably end up in jail myself after the way I would respond to this.

How could someone do that to someones pet! and then refuse to tell them what happened! Would she sell her baby to gypsies if she didnt like it anymore? As far as I am concerned what she did is on almost the same level as that.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by wolfy-hound

But of course, we have only one side of the story, through a 3rd party, so no telling what actually happened either. But from the story as told, I wouldn't want to be around either of those two, and especially not around her!

---

MAN, you people are quick to crucify. I hope none of you are ever on a jury anyone I know is in front of. Facts don't seem to mean squat.

Cept for you Wolfy, but I know where you cut your teeth.

Maybe the paranoia is simply increasing, maybe they're just becoming more obvious, but it sure does feel like this site has become some psych students thesis study.

lol, well I can only respond to the facts as they have been told, if it turns out this isnt what actually happened than of course I would respond differently, but as it stands if thats the way it happened than I stand by my earlier response...

And yes I am paranoid, and see conspiracy every where I look, but then again thats the only sane way to deal with the world we live in...

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by wilomn

Maybe the paranoia is simply increasing, maybe they're just becoming more obvious, but it sure does feel like this site has become some psych students thesis study.

---

Well, "I sleep with my new ball python that I'm afraid of", and "I think wild caught snakes are better" do sound/feel like the same person. Just sayin'. lol..

Psych students or trolls.....

First of all what happened to equality in the relationship? I mean he's an adult she's an adult she should have consulted him first before getting rid of it. 2 hes an adult and very capable of making his own decisions he shouldn't have to ask permission too have it. 3 they really need to find out what happened to it, regardless who let it go if that's what happened he's responsible and liable. this chick sounds like the controlling type, my fist wife was that way thought because she was older by 15 days she controlled everything,money,hobbies,my free time.Screw that time to move on. If I was him i'd go get another one and tell her to live with it or leave. As long there are no children involved.:gj:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by ster36

First of all what happened to equality in the relationship? I mean he's an adult she's an adult she should have consulted him first before getting rid of it. 2 hes an adult and very capable of making his own decisions he shouldn't have to ask permission too have it. 3 they really need to find out what happened to it, regardless who let it go if that's what happened he's responsible and liable. this chick sounds like the controlling type, my fist wife was that way thought because she was older by 15 days she controlled everything,money,hobbies,my free time.Screw that time to move on. If I was him i'd go get another one and tell her to live with it or leave. As long there are no children involved.:gj:

---

When 2 people are cohabitating, you should ask permission. If you don't want to have to ask permission, live on your own.

Live with it or leave is only an option if you own the house and she was just freeloading.

If the person you live with (roommate, girlfriend, parents, whatever) have snake phobia you can't force a snake on them. It will mean death to that snake. If that was my parents' house and you brought a snake in, the shovel will be cutting that snake's head off in 5 seconds flat - and you won't be able to yell animal cruelty at my parents. You brought the snake into hostile environment, you get the animal cruelty tag. Of course, this will be different if my parents actually said yes, you can bring the snake in and then they whack its head off.

this happens a lot more then you would think, i worked in a lot of pet stores over the years and you would not belive the number of snakes, lizards that come in from thing like moving, it was my girlfriends/boyfriends or my wife/husband got deployed and i dont want to take care of it. some people have no resect for what we conseder a pet
steve

I hesitate to jump to conclusions here, but I will say this.

He needs to find out what happened to the snake, and IF she was fool enough to turn it loose, he had darn well better report her to the cops, before someone finds that snake and we have another " killer python in the wild " media circus.

Second, if the two of them have so little respect for each other now, I don't see them having a very healthy relationship in the future. But that's just my opinion.

Gale

She gave it to the guy she sees while the bf is at work!:gj:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by wilomn

Maybe the paranoia is simply increasing, maybe they're just becoming more obvious, but it sure does feel like this site has become some psych students thesis study.

---

Which is funny...because I am a psych student! You have to know how to listen to both sides before condemning people!

Jokes aside, I would ditch her. Not for the fact of loving the Ball python more than her, but because of the lack of respect. :colbert:

How would she feel if she came home to an empty wardrobe. "Sorry, I wasn't feeling the clothes, so I gave them to some homeless bag lady"

Any news on this subject? Thats so messed up... I dont think I would be able to stand a girl like that... She just sounds stupid. Get over it, she was afraid of THE MOUSE??? Not the snake.... ????

If she was afraid of the snake I cant see how she would "get rid of it" with out touch it/ going near it...

I'm surprised your friend was let out of his cage long enough to purchase the snake.

That's like the ultimate in disrespect and definately relationship ending. He had the respect to ask to get the snake. She should at least have the respect to ask him to get rid of it.

A) I find it interesting that this single post by the OP (who hasn't commented since, btw) has gotten so many people up in arms.

B) I smell fish.

C) I wouldn't classify this as "disturbing" news.

D) I'm with Wes - I'm shocked how quickly people judge someone from hearing one side of a story from a second hand source (who hasn't commented since, btw - in case I didn't mention that before).

People judge from a single point of view ALL the time! The media makes certain of that, as do online forums. Sometimes it's firsthand knowledge(i.e. My girlfriend did xx) and sometimes it's third or more hand knowledge(i.e. someone I know had their girlfriend do xx).

People post on here about lousy pet stores ALL the time, and no one jumps up to say "Hey! Why are we judging this store? What if the OP isn't being truthful? What if the store is fine?" That's a single POV against a store, which could be a perfectly good store, being bashed by someone who is mad they wouldn't sell them a retic and a 10g tank to keep it in.

Do I think most pet stores posted about on here are good ones being bashed? No, sadly, I think most probably are about like the posting makes them out to be. But it's one example amoung many where we accept a single POV as truth. When someone posts on a forum like here, we tend to go ahead and believe they are at least trying to be truthful, because this is a good site. So why all of a sudden is it "Why are all of you judging without a report from the "other side" of the story?"?

Unless you're going to say in EVERY case, there should be a report from side #2, you're throwing a few rocks at posters who are going on faith that the OP isn't spinning a lie. If Wilomn or Rabernet posted that someone they knew had this happen, why shouldn't I believe you about it and denounce the girl who disposed of a harmless pet without permission?

In this case, I kind of taste fish myself, but I still stand by my posting, if she did dispose of a pet without finding a responsible home, she's a animal abuser. If there is no snake, no girl, etc etc... then shame on the OP for posting lies, not shame on people who don't approve of animal abusing and neglecting.

I had $0.02 to spend... so now I'm broke and going to work. *waves*

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by snakeman13

She gave it to the guy she sees while the bf is at work!:gj:

---

:rofl::rofl:

Unless the other side of the story includes her actually talking to him BEFORE disposing of his property, there is no need for the other side of the story. There is no justification for what she did, period.

OK I'M THE 1 WHO POSTED THIS... & I'M REPLYING TO THOSE WHO KEEP SAYING "THIS IS FISHY BECAUSE HE HASNT COMMENTED OR REPLIED" MAYBE I HAVE A LIFE, U IDIOT. MAYBE I HAVENT BEEN ONLINE, IDIOT. BUT ANYWAYS... I HAVENT TALKED TO MY FRIEND SO IDK IF HE FOUND ANYTHING OUT, HE'S NOT ANSWERING THE PHONE. I'M GONNA BE HONEST, I'M WILLING TO BET HE STAYS WITH HER. I JUST KNOW HIM TOO WELL, I KNOW THE TYPE OF PERSON HE IS. HE'S A "KEEP THE PEACE" TYPE PERSON. BUT WE'LL SEE. I'LL KEEP U GUYS UPDATED BUT I'M NOT ONLINE 24-7, SORRY :snake:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by king216

OK I'M THE 1 WHO POSTED THIS... & I'M REPLYING TO THOSE WHO KEEP SAYING "THIS IS FISHY BECAUSE HE HASNT COMMENTED OR REPLIED" MAYBE I HAVE A LIFE, U IDIOT. MAYBE I HAVENT BEEN ONLINE, IDIOT. BUT ANYWAYS... I HAVENT TALKED TO MY FRIEND SO IDK IF HE FOUND ANYTHING OUT, HE'S NOT ANSWERING THE PHONE. I'M GONNA BE HONEST, I'M WILLING TO BET HE STAYS WITH HER. I JUST KNOW HIM TOO WELL, I KNOW THE TYPE OF PERSON HE IS. HE'S A "KEEP THE PEACE" TYPE PERSON. BUT WE'LL SEE. I'LL KEEP U GUYS UPDATED BUT I'M NOT ONLINE 24-7, SORRY :snake:

---

1st of all - calling people idiots on this forum won't be tolerated.

2nd of all - calling an Administrator an idiot will get you banned...fast.

Keep pushing.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by nate

1st of all - calling people idiots on this forum won't be tolerated.

2nd of all - calling an administrator an idiot will get you banned...fast.

Keep pushing.

---

well, the administrator should be more respectful, if you want ppl to use ur site & luv ur site, then be a little more professional. Thats very unprofessional to call someone a liar when they share a story. Seriously, how professional is that???

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by king216

well, the administrator should be more respectful, if you want ppl to use ur site & luv ur site, then be a little more professional. Thats very unprofessional to call someone a liar when they share a story. Seriously, how professional is that???

---

That's absolute bull. NOWHERE did she say you're a liar.

It's not disrespectful one bit to say something doesn't sound right... fishy, being the term used.

I don't have that issue because my girl loves my snakes...
but if I was him, I'd wait until she left, get rid of all her stuff...
and when she came home I'd respond 'Oh I'm sorry hon...I'm just not feeling YOU...so I had to get rid of you...'

and that would be that.

So, how does it not sound right? I share a story & the "administrator" says it doesnt sound right, lol thats like me posting a song on myspace & the admin says "hey that song is wack" lol, be more respectful to the people support & promote ur site

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by king216

So, how does it not sound right?

---

I will let her, and the others that agree with her statement, elaborate on that.

Quote:

---

I share a story & the "administrator" says it doesnt sound right, lol thats like me posting a song on myspace & the admin says "hey that song is wack" lol, be more respectful to the people support & promote ur site

---

Well, it is the internet...how many crazy/stupid/made-up/nonsensical/"wack" stories exist?

Forgive us for not believing everything we read on the internet.

And don't read into that too deeply...I'm not implying your story is any of the above. I'm just sayin.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by snakeman13

she gave it to the guy she sees while the bf is at work!:gj:

---

lol!! :8:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by king216

So, how does it not sound right? I share a story & the "administrator" says it doesnt sound right, lol thats like me posting a song on myspace & the admin says "hey that song is wack" lol, be more respectful to the people support & promote ur site

---

Please keep us updated...let us know if your friend finds out what happend.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by king216

So, how does it not sound right? I share a story & the "administrator" says it doesnt sound right, lol thats like me posting a song on myspace & the admin says "hey that song is wack" lol, be more respectful to the people support & promote ur site

---

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Nate

I will let her, and the others that agree with her statement, elaborate on that.

---

Hiya King...
Let me explain this a bit as the first one who said the story is flawed. I'll quote the posts for clarity.

This is what you said (I bolded some parts):

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by king216

my friend wanted a bp very badly. he would always come over my house & hold my bp, he fell in love with it. so he decided to get one. his girlfriend that he lives with is terrified of snakes. but she finally said "ok go ahead & get it". she allowed him to get it even though she didnt want him to AT ALL. once he got it he had to feed it in 2 days because the pet shop had the snake for a month & hadnt fed it... (wtf) but anyways, his girlfriend MADE him feed the bp outside because she was scared of the little mouse. the snake ate & my friend was so happy, he called me & he was very excited the snake ate with no problems. the next day i called him & he answered the phone like "its all bad, very bad news." he told me he came home from work & the snake was not in the tank.... his girlfriend told him "im sorry but i had to get rid of that snake, i wasnt feelin it at all. i hate that thing so i got rid of it". he doesnt know if she killed it or let it looce, but that snake is gone. :tears:

---

So, I replied with:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by anatess

There's something wrong with this story...

I was in the same boat as the g/f. My husband has been wanting a snake since before we got married and I say no. I'm deathly scared of them. All my family (that includes aunt and uncles and cousins) except for one brother does not go into my house anymore. I would have been one of them. But, after 10 years of marriage, I finally relented. So, I can understand how the g/f felt.

BUT... what is wrong with this story... he comes home and the snake is gone. How did THAT happen? Being deathly scared of snakes, I wouldn't have had the courage to go NEAR the enclosure let alone OPEN it. If that was me and I changed my mind (which I can imagine completely happening), I would stay at a friend's for a while until we figure things out.

Or I would call my husband and tell him I can't handle it and to please move the snake somewhere out of the house. Or, if I was a real mean witch, I would call a friend to get rid of it...

So, since we know the husband didn't know anything about it, then there's gotta be an accomplice, unless the story we got is flawed.

Intriguing mystery, this one.

---

And rabernet the administrator said:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by rabernet

A) I find it interesting that this single post by the OP (who hasn't commented since, btw) has gotten so many people up in arms.

B) I smell fish.

---

Rabernet's point is that so many people crucified the girlfriend when there's not enough information to go with.

We were hoping you'd chime in to clarify some stuff...

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by anatess

Hiya King...
Let me explain this a bit as the first one who said the story is flawed. I'll quote the posts for clarity.

This is what you said (I bolded some parts):



So, I replied with:




And rabernet the administrator said:


Rabernet's point is that so many people crucified the girlfriend when there's not enough information to go with.

We were hoping you'd chime in to clarify some stuff...

---

my friend is not answering his phone, so idk if he found anything out, she probably didnt touch the snake herself so she could've had someone else get it, at the same time, he basically made her hold it once, he told me she held it but didnt like it at all, so who knows, maybe she did touch it since she knows the snake wont attack her, i dont know... my friend told me he doesnt know... maybe just MAYBE he knows but doesnt want to tell me because he knows i'll be upset, he knows i'll be furious if that snake is hurt, i was obsessed with that bp, it was normal with very bright colors, im gettin mad thinkin about because i have a feeling he's not gonna do nothin about the situation :confused:

Jesus, that wouldn't stand with me. No offense to any ladies out there whatsoever, but she would be gone so fast her head would spin. If she does that to a snake because she has a phobia, what happens when the baby starts to get on her nerves?

I say this based on the story told.

I don't have much of a temper, and I have to admit the mere thought of someone doing that in the way it was portrayed boils my blood. I think some guys need to have a bit more self respect, just as there are scumbag boyfriends/husbands the same holds true for the GF/wife side of the coin.

I am a softy though and lost a job to take an injured animal to the vet.