Ugh parents...

I just told my mom how I want to go to this reptile expo about 2 hours away and she FLIPPED out telling me that I have stupid interests and that she'd be embarrassed to tell people that I went to something "as stupid as that". I'm just pretty upset that my parents don't care about my interest in snakes. Do any of you ever have problems with your parents and keeping reptiles?

yea all of my family hates my reptiles. they wont bring me to shows. so since im a mountain biker i hop on my bike and go. the other day i rode 6 hours to go to a show.

:hug:

I'm sorry :(

My mom (wait, scratch that, my whole family) doesn't support my interest in reptiles. When I told her I wanted to breed them, she just rolled her eyes.

People don't understand. Be proud :]

Well, lets see. Since I'm as old if not older than your mom, no I don't have any issues with my mom and my hobbies.

Are you showing here that you are responsible and tkae care of your reptiles? Does she have to deal with the smell of snake poo and urates? Are you doing the other things she's asking you to to (chores)?

I'm not taking sides but many times a parent is just looking for you to be responsible. All around, not just in one aspect of your life. But in all areas.

I hope you can work these issues out. Herping can be addicting and becomes a lifetime habit. Not having, at the very least, a tolerent parent can be a BIG issue.

Good Luck!
Jim Smith

I'm just hoping that my parents will get used to the fact that I love snakes and everything about them. My family is very conservative and anything out of the ordinary is taboo! Now I just can't wait till I have my own place where I won't have to "bother" them with my interest in snakes. The whole snake thing is definitely addictive! I started out with a normal ball python not knowing that there was a whole world full of amazing morphs! Now I just wan't to collect them all! Hah, I guess I can't get down just because they don't share the same love of reptiles I do. Maybe someday they'll understand!:)

I'm 44 and my parents don't understand my love for my ball pythons, and I think my mother is hoping that this is a "phase" but it coming to realize that it's not.

Last year when they were visiting me, my father helped me build a rack, while my mother quietly organized my pantry. She did let me bring eggs home with me when I was visiting my first year breeding and had a clutch due to hatch.

In the end, my folks love me and while they don't share the same fascination (don't even understand it), they support that it's something that I love and that I've made incredible friends because of this hobby.

My mom has always been deathly afraid of snakes. I waited till I was old enough and had my own place, as most college campuses don't allow pets. Now that I have my own place I can do whatever I want, to some degree, my fiance has to put up with things about me, just as much as I put up with things about him :P

It might not happen for several years, but eventually your family should warm up to it enough that they understand it's a hobby of yours that's not going to go away. Just deal with it for now. You'll be out of the house in no time. I know it doesn't seem like it, but it will happen sooner than you think! I was SOOO happy to get out of the house, it has been five years already.

yeah none of my family dislikes my passion or hobby there more or less indifferent. they have absolutely no idea why or how you can love a reptile since it doesnt love you back.

Yeah don't parents suck? They provide for you and take care of you and spend a veritable fortune on you. Pfft, It's a load if you ask me.


Seriously though I know it sucks when your parents don't share your interests. Luckily my mom has supported me in whatever I've been interested in. She loves all my snakes and can't get enough of them. I am gonna start taking her to reptile cons.


Some people have fears maybe your parents are afraid of snakes. Give it time. Show them your responsible. They may never understand but there approval doesn't matter it's your love of the hobby and there love for you.

Well my mom doesn't like snakes. She is sorta afraid of them I guess. She let's me do what I want for the most part but told me she doesn't ever want to see it lol

But she knows it is something I enjoy and knows I'm responsible with my animals so she lets me be :)

My mom is afraid of my snakes too.. when i first got my red tail boa she told me she was afraid of him getting loose and "chewing" on stuff! I just don't think she believes there are such things as nice snakes. I'm responsible with my snakes too but i doubt my parents will ever understand why i could love a creepy scaly creature (even though i think they are beautiful and call them my babies... hah ) I just know when I have my own house someday I'll have a snake room! I don't think my parents will ever come visit me =P

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Originally Posted by j_h_smith

Well, lets see. Since I'm as old if not older than your mom, no I don't have any issues with my mom and my hobbies.

Are you showing here that you are responsible and tkae care of your reptiles? Does she have to deal with the smell of snake poo and urates? Are you doing the other things she's asking you to to (chores)?

I'm not taking sides but many times a parent is just looking for you to be responsible. All around, not just in one aspect of your life. But in all areas.

I hope you can work these issues out. Herping can be addicting and becomes a lifetime habit. Not having, at the very least, a tolerent parent can be a BIG issue.

Good Luck!
Jim Smith

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I don't think that is what the OP means. I think this is more talking about the parent's idea that the hobby is useless and immature. Its a 'stupid' interest. Not so much that the OP's parent thinks he/she can't take care of an animal. It is just that the idea of keeping something as "stupid" as a reptile is childish.

My family doesn't like the fact I keep reptiles and I can honestly say that my family doesn't come over for dinner much. They prefer I come see them. They don't like the reptiles or that I keep them. I told them I want to breed them and they said it is a stupid idea and I should invest my time and money into something like reptiles. I should go to school and "do something with my life." My mom is also trying to convince me that I should not have reptiles when I have kids because "reptiles carry disease that could be passed to my child." (even though I have a strict handling rule of washing my hands before and after handling) Ugh...anyway...I feel your pain. All you can do is take a deep breath, realize that this is not something she is interested in or may never be interested in.

And I think parents sometimes just don't understand the animal so that leads them to not like them like so many other people do. My mom watches the news to much so I'm sure she sees snake related stuff sometimes. The first time I said anything about getting a python she heard python and flipped thinking it was get loose and strangle everyone during the night. I did educate her on snakes some and she warmed up a little but a lot of people are just scared because of things they hear and not really knowing the truth. Stupid television!

I just hope that my parents don't come in the way of me keeping reptiles. I love them and if they ever told me the snakes had to go I would cry :tears: My dad told me if I plan on having kids he won't let me have my boa constrictor because he'd be scared that it would be a danger to my kids...Well I keep many locks on my snakes cages and there is no way my boa could get out... I just kinda wish that my parents could at least respect the fact that I have a really different interest than the rest of my sports-loving family. I completely understand if they don't like snakes, but I feel like they should at least love me even though I love snakes! My mom told me today she'd be embarrassed to have to tell people I'm busy at a reptile expo :mad:

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Originally Posted by Carlene16

I just hope that my parents don't come in the way of me keeping reptiles. I love them and if they ever told me the snakes had to go I would cry :tears: My dad told me if I plan on having kids he won't let me have my boa constrictor because he'd be scared that it would be a danger to my kids...Well I keep many locks on my snakes cages and there is no way my boa could get out... I just kinda wish that my parents could at least respect the fact that I have a really different interest than the rest of my sports-loving family. I completely understand if they don't like snakes, but I feel like they should at least love me even though I love snakes! My mom told me today she'd be embarrassed to have to tell people I'm busy at a reptile expo :mad:

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There's nothing that you posted that suggests that your parents don't love you. Just because they don't understand or like snakes doesn't mean that they don't love you.

Remind your mother that she doesn't HAVE to tell people that you're busy at a reptile expo. ;)

Hahah your right, I know my parents love me! I just know they don't like some of things I choose to like =] And that's what I told her! There's no reason to tell people I'm going to a reptile expo.. though I'm rather proud to be going to my first one :P

I know how you feel i have a growing collection right now just 4 bps. im 18 live at home and im going to start breeding them , my parents think its a joke that its pointless and theres nothing to get back from them. people fear and look down on what they dont understand. i have a few friends that have family members in to snakes as well and would love to buy some babies off me once i breed my spider to my pastel and offered me 800 bucks for a bumble bee , and my parents find it very hard to believe that anyone drops more then 100 on a snake , ive tried explaining it to them but they wont ever understand . i mean think about it i cant see the point in dropping 100s of dollars on a coin but coin collectors do. well all in all im going to just prove them wrong, now dont get me wrong i love these animals but im going to sell some to friends and once i have that 800 in my hands from a bumble bee maybe they wont look at it as so much of a joke any more

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Originally Posted by chris4554

And I think parents sometimes just don't understand the animal so that leads them to not like them like so many other people do. My mom watches the news to much so I'm sure she sees snake related stuff sometimes. The first time I said anything about getting a python she heard python and flipped thinking it was get loose and strangle everyone during the night. I did educate her on snakes some and she warmed up a little but a lot of people are just scared because of things they hear and not really knowing the truth. Stupid television!

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Also i agree the media is ridiculous they make these animals look very bad , and feed off this crap. u never see on the tv head lines "bunny rabbit gives 7 year old rabies" but i bet it happens just nobody thinks of a bunny rabbit as a blood thirsty killer so it doenst make the head lines

My parents didn't like snakes when I first got into the hobby. That slowly changed over time. My mom warmed up to them pretty quickly and she even helps take care of my natal rats now. My dad took a bit more time to get used to the snakes. He's a business man, so he became more interested when I showed him that these animals can be good investments. Funny how certain parts of the hobby appeal to outsiders. He's always excited for me to make my next big sale, haha.

Hahah I actually want to produce a couple bumblebees too :D now that I'm getting my super pastel male I want a spider female! If I even told my parents I planned on breeding my snakes they would yell at me just because there would be more snakes :P But I will breed him someday :) The media makes snakes sound soooo bad.. Recently there was the show on animal planet called like alien invaders or something and it talked about how the burmese and rock python are taking over in parts of florida.. and it just made snakes sound like blood thirsty killers and I got pretty iritated watching that show. It is a problem but no need to makes responsible pet owners sound bad by bashing large snake owners.

My parents like snakes. My Dads the one that wanted to get 2 snakes 1 for him and 1 for me but we settled with one for now. And then he said he wanted to buy a HET Albino Female and breed it with my HET Albino Male.

Also my grandma lives with us just in the downstairs which has its own kitchen, bathroom and stuff kinda like a mother and law house but any way she was mad when I told her I was getting a snake and I come home with it and the first day I got her to touch him and then later on that week I got her let him sit in her lap. =)

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Originally Posted by Bpmike1208

Also i agree the media is ridiculous they make these animals look very bad , and feed off this crap. u never see on the tv head lines "bunny rabbit gives 7 year old rabies" but i bet it happens just nobody thinks of a bunny rabbit as a blood thirsty killer so it doenst make the head lines

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmy_C...abbit_incident

Hahahah I think I'd be more afraid of a rabbit that's acting crazy than a snake any day (depending on the kind :) )

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Originally Posted by WingedWolfPsion

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmy_C...abbit_incident

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Lmao, that just made the rest of my day. >.>

Something to think about is maybe suggesting that you invite 1 or 2 friends to come along and have your parents drop you off at the expo and then they can go do something that interests them for a while and come back and pick y'all up. Since you know what your parents are into, before even suggesting that, try Googling the "tourism" or "planned events" web page for the city that the expo is going to be in and see if there are any events planned for that weekend that your parents might enjoy, and offer that as an idea that they could do while you were at the expo. Just a thought...

i guess i've been really lucky... my parents have always been lenient with me and my siblings. my dad told me as he was giving me the infamous sex talk, my mom and him didn't want to tell me what to do or what not to do, but rather inform us so we can make our own intelligent decisions based on our knowledge. seemed to work out pretty well =]. i'm not a screwup, my sister is a graphic design graduate, my other sister is really excelling in her career in banking..

my mom didn't like snakes but when she saw the albino, and all the crazy morphs, she allowed me to buy a snake rack for 4 snakes that i put a lot of time into :D

maybe ur mom just has to see the docile and beauty of the snakes. show her cool morphs, give her a crash course on genetics and y it's so interesting. hold ur snake and show her how calm and relaxed they are. :gj:

I read the first post:

Your mother flipped at you for saying something then belittled your interests which are within the range of normal human interests...

How old is she? Cus it sounds like someone's hit the big M and is having tantrums (no matter how old you are you can have tantrums, I know I have them every time I'm dehydrated :rolleyes: ).

Even though my mom and I got in fights all the time over stupid things (my whole family cannot spend more than a few days together without wanting to kill one another) she never belittled me or anything. A parent who throws random temper tantrums or who insults and belittles their children clearly shouldnt have had children, because they probably were never really adults and havent developed the mental capacity to have such an influence over another human's life.

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Originally Posted by WingedWolfPsion

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmy_C...abbit_incident

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i bet you searched google just to find that too ahhaha lol

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Originally Posted by WingedWolfPsion

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmy_C...abbit_incident

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Killer rabbits!! Let's ban all rabbits as pets, they do no good they only kill people! They are bred to kill the president!

It sounds like your mother is extremely immature and needs to be put on time-out.

carlene16, i feel for ya i really do...& i totally understand your frustration. i told my dad a little bit ago that i wanted a snake for a pet & his response was, quote -
" no no no :colbert: you dont need a snake. they're disgusting, creepy, weird lookin' things. dont get a snake, get a lizard." unquote.
im almost 30 & that stung quite a bit. but you know what? im an adult & i have the power to do what i please, when i please (within the law of course) & there aint a danged thing he can do to change that, plus it helps that i live 3000 miles away from him so, yeah.
:rofl:
also, my fiancee doesnt like snakes either & definitley is opposed to me getting 1 snake & when i told him i wanted 3...possibly 4, he about shot threw our roof!
he's trying to tell me im only allowed to get 1 & i just tell him like it is, which usually goes somegthing like this-
" i want 3 ball pythons & MAYBE a nicaraguan boa & there aint a darned thing YOU can do about it so dont tell me no!" :colbert:
when i want something, im like a pit bull on a t-bone steak. ya aint getting it away from me lest you be hurt tryin', lol... im kind of a "b-word" sometimes but you know what? i have my heart set on those 3 maybe 4 snakes.
it's not like i'm gonna ask him to do anything for them. i plan on being their sole caregiver unless my daughter wants to help with their daily care. i plan on being the one to do everything required to keep them healthy. the only thing he'll have to do is drive me to pick them up & drive me & them to the vet (should they ever need to go). thats all i'd ask of him when it comes to the snakes, thats it.
he's just trying to pull the "controlling man-card" on me but i keep growin' the bigger set of balls.
:rofl:
ok sorry for my rant, lol.

My dad supports my hobby ; My mom doesn't. Its just they were not brought up to like reptiles ; rodents etc. Aha only dogs ; cats ; birds etc. Trust within 100 years a reptile will be like a bird in the fact thats how much they'll be wanted.

-Daniel

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Originally Posted by Carlene16

I just told my mom how I want to go to this reptile expo about 2 hours away and she FLIPPED out telling me that I have stupid interests and that she'd be embarrassed to tell people that I went to something "as stupid as that". I'm just pretty upset that my parents don't care about my interest in snakes. Do any of you ever have problems with your parents and keeping reptiles?

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i didn't read the thread but I'm going to just throw this out there... may be that time of month!

Cant say i have a problem bringing any animal home. As long as i pay for everything and nothing in the house gets wrecked its fine by my mother. I keep everything spot less so theres no odors and the rats are outback in the garage.

Good luck with your folks I'm 26 and my family hates the fact I love snakes but my girl and kids love them to that's all that matters.

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Originally Posted by het.pied

i didn't read the thread but I'm going to just throw this out there... may be that time of month!

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I'll restate what I did before: Forget it being that time of the month, it's much more likely she is going through Menopause with that kind of drastic reaction.

Thanks for supporting my rant about my parents everyone =] I think maybe my mom is going through menopause.. aha I actually get to go to the reptile expo tomorrow... I am so excited! I'm going to take soooo many pictures! I hope that maybe someday my parents will understand my love for all animals (especially reptiles) And even if they don't that's fine too. I just can't wait till I have my own place and I can have a room full of snakes. And I know when I have kids myself they will be allowed to love all animals too.

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Originally Posted by Carlene16

Thanks for supporting my rant about my parents everyone =] I think maybe my mom is going through menopause.. aha I actually get to go to the reptile expo tomorrow... I am so excited! I'm going to take soooo many pictures! I hope that maybe someday my parents will understand my love for all animals (especially reptiles) And even if they don't that's fine too. I just can't wait till I have my own place and I can have a room full of snakes. And I know when I have kids myself they will be allowed to love all animals too.

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quick question, how did you convince her.

If you wine and pleaded and cried, then that wasnt the right way to do it. You cant always get what you want. I'm not saying that you did, but I know people do that when they get the response that they dont want from their parents. I regret every time I did what it took till I got what I want. But I hope you actally talked to them and showed how mature you were. Like I said I'm not acusing, and happy for you, but if you were a "brat", shame on you. lol :8:

How to get a snake:

YouTube - Top Five Ways To Get Snakes: SnakeBytesTV

Lol.

I never beg and cry and act like a brat :) That's my brother you described hahah. But really no I just sat my mom down after work tonight and told her how much it would really mean to me if she would let me go to the reptile expo. I told her that caring for and having reptiles is something that really does make me happy. She said she doesn't understand one bit how I could love a snake but she said if it makes me happy then sure I could go. I know when I come home tomorrow I'll be wanting to tell her how awesome it was, but she'd probably just roll her eyes hahah. I'm really happy she's letting me go though!:D

I am, a lucky child, When i was 11 my mother fell in love with Turtles, so she understood my fasination with Snakes, a short month after she got her first turtle, Soup, i got my first corn snake [after debating over Corn, Milk, or python] I'm now 15 and addicted, My ultimate goal, is a reticulated Python. Or, i'd settle for a Bumblebee Ball Python. hehe... Yah My Dad has two Ball Pythons, so he doesn't mind [cept for the fact i got my snakes before he did even tho he wanted one since childhood] And now mother has 4 turtles, and gives to any new addition to my addiction.


My boyfriend, on the other hand... Is slightly nervous around the snakes [:

My fascination with herps started when I was in college to be a vet tech and I was working at a pet store. I held my first ball python and I was hooked. I got my first baby BP the year aftr that. My mom wasn't too happy about and my stepdad didn't want a snake in the house, but being a pet lover too, my mom convinced him that I was responsible with my pets and that it wouldn't be so bad.

My stepdad's only condition was that if he would ever find it out of the tank I had to get rid her. It actually happened one time where she managed to squeeze somewhere between the lid and the tank and my mom found her, but that was it. I got lucky on that one. My mom became very fascinated with my snake and really liked her, even taking her out sometimes.

I'm lucky to have met my husband who's love for reptiles is a bout the same of mine. He actually introduced me to reptile shows and turtles, and I discovered the fantastic world of morphs. Now we have 4 BP, 19 turtles, 3 cats with his 3 boys in the house lol Sometimes we feel like the kids think we are crazy. The really don't get our passion for our herps, and I'm all disappointed because I thought they would love to have reptiles in the house being little boys. But it's all about video games for them ;)

That said, my whole family doesn't get why I like turtles and snakes so much. I think they are beautiful to watch. I like cats and dogs too, it's just herps are totally different. It's truly a hobby and I love taking care of them or watch them. At least they are happy that I met someone that shares that passion with me, although he thinks I go overboard sometimes. Where 1 or 2 would be enough for him, I think that 4 or 10 would be just fine haha. Gotta have all the colors / morphs.

I think the way you introduced it to your mom is the good way, and at least she didn't belittle you this time. If she doesn't want to look at your pictures and hear about it, just post them here!!! We will look at it!