Re: how to deal with an ex
dam. so i screwed up tonight and went and brought her stuff to her. and she sat there and told me how she will change and doesnt want me out of her life, and that she cares about me. and i gave in. so i sat there and made her point out all the bad and hurtful things that she has been doing to me, mostly lying, and not even 5 minutes later she lied she said she was going out for dinner with her girlfriends, so i was like where at? and shes like uh... i dunno if we are or not. so i say what are you going to drink again? and yes she is.
gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaokihgoaeirhgouihg
so i said my goodbyes and left her in a puddle of tears.
so im headed home and she calls. i answer. she says (in a nut shell) "from now on i will never lie to you again blah blah." and i give her another chance.
it sucks cause i went there basically to tell her im done and we are over and it turns into this. both of us spilling our hearts out to each other. my problem is being so forgiving. like we can fight all day long and stay at each others throats and at the end of the day we both usually apologize and have a gr8 time together.
rabble rabble rabble
Re: how to deal with an ex
Bad relationships can be like an addictive drug. If you allow yourself the least bit of wishy-washy-ness on the matter of quitting...you're going to continue to give into temptation.
When you're ready...you need to steel your heart and make the decision to "quit her" in your deepest being...no matter what. Prepare yourself for the inevitable withdrawal symptoms that are going to come. It WILL hurt. You WILL miss her and find yourself wanting to be with her. And she WILL do her damndest to tempt and taunt you back into her life so she can keep you on her string. (She's likely as addicted to you as you are to her....but unfortunately, she's also addicted to her lifestyle of drinking and partying and being with whoever is convenient for the moment.) You have to decide ahead of time...before you face these hurdles...how you will get over them.
Don't forget this thread is here. Tons of great advice to help remind you why your decision (when you finally make it) is the right one.
I wish you all the best....I know it's not an easy thing to get through.
Re: how to deal with an ex
Ouch....I know where your coming from. I was in a somewhat similar situation with an ex, but we had been together for almost 4 years. And just recently my brother's girlfriend toyed with him like this. She said that if she dated girls while she was dating him it wasn't cheating *grrr* and did it even though he didn't like it. He would catch her, she would cry and make him feel bad b/c she cried, and he'd give her another chance. She played him over and over and over again. Every time, tears, "I'm so sorry...it'll never happen again" and not a few weeks later she was making out with another girl. I have a very strong opinion of girls like that....and not one I can put on a family friendly forum. Once my brother finally stood up and said he wasn't going to deal with it any more, she freaked, cried, called nonstop, but when he finally stood his ground, she just quit. With in a week or so she had another boyfriend, *and* a girlfriend. She just want's someone to toy with. You may really honestly care about her, but it's not honest feelings being retuned.
It's not easy, but you'll eventually have to stand your ground and just say no.
Sorry about the rant, the thing with my brother happened really recently and I still get all worked up. There is someone that will treat you with the respect that you deserve, and actually mean it.
Re: how to deal with an ex
looks like she has you figured out but you dont have yourself figured out yet.
Personally I would remove myself from this situation and spend some time with other people and girls and focus on seeing how other people behave and treat you rather than giving in each time she cries and says she will change.
I doubt she will , most dont tbh IMO.
Best of luck but I think your making a mistake prolonging the agony that will be.
Hope I am wrong and she realises and changes for the better, though I cant see it.
Re: how to deal with an ex
haha dude I basicly went through the same thing (minus the giving in part) 9 months, she sucked as a girlfriend towards the end. Trust me, just ignore her. it'll all work out in your favor. it did for me anyways (started dating a girl who ive known for a long time but just never actually thought about in that way and shes the best.) and now my ex is alone and VERY bitter haha I actually like hearing the things she has to say about me (she sent my family a christmas card and left me out of it HAHAHA) and I LOVE the fact that after we broke up she gained about 10 pounds. :D. funny stuff. in short, LEAVE HER.
Re: how to deal with an ex
Quote:
Originally Posted by tigerlily
You'll never be happy if you allow someone to treat you badly. Fill your life with people who make you a better person, and fill your life with happiness. It's not worth it to try to make a square peg fit into a round hole. It may hurt a bit now, but it's better than years of misery. I'd walk away myself.
Excellant advise. When all else fails, follow your bliss. Is it making your feel good, feel happy? If you stop calling her she will show more interest in you. But you should just let it go. I know its hard but its only a temporary bummer.
