Is it just me...

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Originally Posted by Kaorte

Taking criticism is one thing. Learning how to give CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is another. Always start with a positive, insert a negative, and hopefully end with a positive. There are ways to be nice without "sugar coating".

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Sandwich method!

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Normally if I feel like somebody is being cranky, I try to figure out which buttons to press to see how mad I can make that person.

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Originally Posted by Anya

I just don't remember it being like this before. (I took a break for almost a year) There are a lot of really nice members on her, but they seem to be getting lost in a sea of grumpiness. *sigh*, I guess just like every sci-fi show will eventually turn into Star Trek, every forum will always descend into a grumpifest. I'm still sticking around, though, if only to be nice, lol.

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I agree. The members that are nice, are some of the most respected people. It's sad that its hard to find a genuine person nowadays.

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Originally Posted by Kaorte

Kodie..... that is exactly the crankiness she is talking about. You are ASSuming that she thinks that everyone should have the same opinion. Clearly, that is not the case.

There is a difference between sugar coating and being CONSIDERATE and KIND to your fellow reptile lovers. Don't use that as an excuse to perpetuate the bad attitudes we see on this site.



I hear you Anya. I see it all too often. Threads get out of control for various reasons... most of the time I don't understand it. I don't understand why we, who share in common a really cool hobby, feel the need to jump down each other's throats for differing opinions. Now don't get me wrong, I love a debate as long as people are being respectful of one another.

This whole attitude like "oh well I don't need to sugar coat anything because its the internet and I can say what I want", well sure you can say what you want, but you also need to think about how other people are going to read your posts. Simple changes can mean the difference between coming off as arrogant and rude or considerate but with a differing opinion.


I think people need to think their words through a little more before they click the "submit" button.

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Exactly! Thank you!!

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Originally Posted by Kodieh

If everyone believes the same thing, there'd be no reason for this site and no reason for new comers to ask questions. Want to be coddled, head on out the door. The sugar coating washes off when you log in.

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D Ouch Che

I feel the same as Anya on this. Looking at my first threads I posted, I feel fortunate that members like @Kaorte took an interest and were kind to me in my ignorance. I look at some newbie posters (who have been misinformed by other sites and their "reptile friends") and see them TORN UP by some people. "You need to buy this"; "What did you do that for?"; "What do you think you're doing?"...

Ive been trying to preempt some of this bombastic criticism by keepin an eye out for new posters and trying to kindly direct them to the better way (just like y'all did for me)

There still are a lot of threads that come across as being negative/accusatory, but I don't think that will go away. We just have to do our part to keep the air positive as possible

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Originally Posted by Mrl249

I agree. The members that are nice, are some of the most respected people. It's sad that its hard to find a genuine person nowadays.

Exactly! Thank you!!


D Ouch Che

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And see, your opinion is moot when you act the way you say people shouldn't. Your opinion of me is fine, I'd go a step further and claim I'm a right arse. But, calling it like you see it is just in the same stead as the attitude you argue against.

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Originally Posted by Neal

Normally if I feel like somebody is being cranky, I try to figure out which buttons to press to see how mad I can make that person.

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I like the way you think haha.

The world would be such a wonderful place if everyone was always in a good mood, getting along with others and sharing the same opinion :rolleyes:

http://i954.photobucket.com/albums/a...er/Kumbaya.jpg

:rofl:

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Originally Posted by Kodieh

And see, your opinion is moot when you act the way you say people shouldn't. Your opinion of me is fine, I'd go a step further and claim I'm a right arse. But, calling it like you see it is just in the same stead as the attitude you argue against.

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I'll admit, you have a point.

However, grumpiness breeds grumpiness. That's just how it is. No one, no matter what they believe the proper way to act is, is always going to be patient and nice. Because even the nice ones get sick of the jerks, and become jerks themselves.

Everyone can do their part to just try to be...nice.

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Originally Posted by Deborah

The world would be such a wonderful place if everyone was always in a good mood, getting along with others and sharing the same opinion :rolleyes:

http://i954.photobucket.com/albums/a...er/Kumbaya.jpg

:rofl:

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:rofl::rofl:

One day soon @Anya.....it will be paradise ;)

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Originally Posted by Kaorte

Taking criticism is one thing. Learning how to give CONSTRUCTIVE criticism is another.

Always start with a positive, insert a negative, and hopefully end with a positive.

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This is exactly how I try to structure my posts when debating on a topic.

I'm not perfect and probably have a rude or aggressive post(s) somewhere, but I try my best to be helpful and hopefully friendly sounding.

Lately, when I get annoyed or upset, I've learned just to leave and come back later with a clear head.

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