Need some advice

Oh...sorry forgot to mention...type out a written notice and post it on her bedroom door and specifically state that the typed notice is serving as legal notification from you....also make a copy of it for yourself and start to keep a file of all of this stuff in a safe and secret place.


I am sure this whole situation is just poop and I am sorry and I hope it all works out!

Note: I am not a lawyer, nor do I play one on the interwebz; nothing I say should be construed as legal advice. For actual legal advice, please consult an attorney licensed to practice in your state (and in this circumstance it might not be a bad idea).

I googled "Renters Rights in Wisconsin" and found this link. From what I read there, a landlord needs to provide a tenant with either a 5 day or 14 day written notice to vacate. Where you may fall into some trouble could be your own lease; you may wish to review it and see if it addresses roommates. If your landlord is aware of your sister's residence (or it isn't addressed in the lease) you may be able to garner some support there. If your landlord is unaware of the situation and your lease has language in it prohibiting undisclosed roommates, you could potentially have a problem.

Just be careful, and good luck. These situations are always stressful and when you add the whole "family" bit into the mix it can get downright intolerable :(

I think she is taking you seriously. She knows she can't just move out. But that is the natural reaction when someone lays down the law. She is young. She will learn that moving out won't solve anything.

Just assure her you are serious. Ask for rent and utility checks. She will get the picture. Its time to grow up!

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She doesn't take you seriously because she knows they're empty threats. You tell her to do things, she doesn't, you let it go. Her cat was being neglected, you told her you'd drop it off at the shelter, she comes home with a new kitten. You let the tension build until you feel you need to resort to extreme measures, and then you're rewarding her for calling you out on them.

At this point, if you do follow-through with calling the police on her, make sure you have an understanding of renters' rights. In some areas, just staying there for a certain period of time gives her residency, and you'll need to go through the full eviction process (notice, etc.) rather than just kicking her out.

Personally I'd take some time to calm down, and then re-approach her. Maybe you can level with her. "Look, I hate that we're bickering all the time and I want us to have a good relationship. This is meant to be an opportunity for you and we should embrace it. Sometimes I feel like my effort is being wasted, and I get overwhelmed when I'm doing A, B and C by myself. I want you to be successful, and I need more help. Do you think what I'm asking of you is unreasonable? Do you feel I'm not pulling my own weight? Let's sit down tomorrow and talk about our responsibilities and expectations of each other."

I know she isn't acting like an adult, but she'll be more apt to respond to you if you still treat her like one. If you're respectful of her she'll feel less of a need to act defensively (which presents itself in "I don't care what you do to me"). She'll also subconsciously feel more capable of being responsible just by "playing adult" and hopefully those good feelings will stick long enough to form habits.

Start locking up the food. When she wants some Ramen noodles, politely remind her where the store is at, and don't give her a ride. Remove the light bulbs from her room, along with anything electronic. When she wants to know why, calmly explain to her that light and music aren't free. Take all of your toiletries in and out of the bathroom with you as you need them - ALL of it, don't leave so much as a square of tp in there. When she's watching tv, or chatting online, casually walk over and unplug the television/computer and remind her again that electricity, internet, and cable are not free.

Be nice about all of it. Tell her that you're doing her a huge favor by allowing her to sleep and shower there, since those things typically aren't free either. And let her know that you aren't "taking" these luxuries away from her, you just aren't going to give them to her anymore. When she gets a job and starts contributing, she can start to buy back some of these things. I'd suggest she start with food :)

The tattoo would put me over the edge. I'm pretty much a door mat myself, but I think I might kill someone if they said that to me while I'm enjoying a steamy bowl of Ramen noodles after a long day at work, knowing that I could be eating a steak if it weren't for her lazy as...butt.

You are WAY to kind. It's your place first and last. She should never be bringing someone to your home that she doesnt know in real life. Forget about the reptiles. We are talking about your LIFE. There are a LOT of carzy people in this world.