Sometimes I hate him!

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Originally Posted by PorcelainxDoll

I try talking to him. He calls me a pessamist and shuts down everything I say. Sometimes I wish I could leave him, but I cant afford to financially live without his paychecks :(



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get a smaller place by yourself and your rent will go down. CT is THE most expensive state to live in and i am 100% sure that i could live off of $1200 a month. If hes only shutting you down and trying to put the blame on you then hes not a man, hes a child. A man supports his family, he doesnt go out and spend money on wants instead of needs. I dont have a wife or a gf, but i can assure you if i did she would never go three days without food.

In already in an efficiency. Cant get any smaller or cheaper. I jyst also have a lot if car and bank loans.. If I could get one or 2 of them payed off I could survive just fine on my own.
Plus I have to mention we got in a fight earlier about me wanting him to just sit and talk to me sometimes.

He burned off and has been gone for 2 hours.


Im sorry if I have caused comotion or anything. I am just a very sad and hurt woman for the last few days, and I really have no one else to vent to.
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That really blows...Believe me im pretty sure all of us have been in a similar situation at one time or another, I know I have. But things will get better (hopefully) Just be glad you dont have kids and tell him to quit being a jerk off and that your hungry, maybe he can bring you home some food? I wish you were close to me because I would help you out.

Don't apologize, we're just anons giving you unbridled third party perspectives.

Go gold digging and get a guy who can ACTUALLY help you get out of debt if your reason for staying with him is financial dependence. It sounds like he is more of a drain than a contributor to you.

If you guys can't sit in an empty room together for a few hours with no form of entertainment other than each other (physical entertainment banned from said empty room) and have a good time then you simply shouldn't be together with this person. Call me idealistic, but I've seen enough successful relationships to know that they're possible and that the above mentioned is true in 100% of those cases.

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Originally Posted by MrLang

If you guys can't sit in an empty room together for a few hours with no form of entertainment other than each other (physical entertainment banned from said empty room) and have a good time then you simply shouldn't be together with this person. Call me idealistic, but I've seen enough successful relationships to know that they're possible and that the above mentioned is true in 100% of those cases.

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Very well said.

The bare facts are the guy doesn't get a flying flip about your opinion or what you think should be done with the money. You can sit there wringing your hands and telling yourself you can't do anything about it... or you can get up on your hind legs, and do something about it.

The fact that you're claiming you haven't eaten in 3 days, but he's been eating and obviously doesn't care whether you're starving or not shows that you are perfectly willing to take whatever selfish abuse he wants to deal out to you.

Like someone else said, you can live off a box of dry pasta for a week. Or rice and beans. You're paying for luxuries while saying you can't buy food. Turn off the tv, internet, phone, sell the animals... there's always options, whether you like them or want to do it or not. There's also always places to go get a meal, churches, shelters and such. Are you saying that you don't have ONE person that you know that would spot you $5 to buy pasta/rice/beans? Because I hate most of my neighbors but I guarantee I could find $5 off someone.

As long as you are perfectly willing to be treated like crud, there's no reason he should change. Kick him out, figure out how to live more frugally and straighten up your life.

Girl I am so sorry he is being a jerk off. I def know from experience from someone in my family that was hard on drugs for like 13 years that it takes a lot of hard work and dedication (& the want to) to quit doing them! appearently he doesnt want to quit them otherwise like most ppl said he would think about "yall" and not"HIM"!! I am not a big fan of ppl choosing drugs over family cuz my mom chose them over me, not the best thing in the world! I dont really know what to say to help you much other than if you want out get out dont worry bout the money.. Money can always be made if your not happy dont kill yourself trying to make something work that wasnt ment to be! Maybe go live with another family member for awhile till you get on your feet! I'v been in a relationship where I was scared to get out cuz I didnt know if I had anywhere to go or if I would have any money! Family is someone you can 99% of the time count on mine was there for me wen I left the a**hole i was with.. Now look at me and Adam me and you have had this talk before! I would leave just talk to some of your family

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Originally Posted by PorcelainxDoll

I try talking to him. He calls me a pessamist and shuts down everything I say. Sometimes I wish I could leave him, but I cant afford to financially live without his paychecks :(



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I don't think you really DO want to leave him, or you wouldn't be making excuses for him. The fact that he's a felon already shows he has a history of making poor choices.

You also can't afford financially to be with him if he cares so little for you that getting pot is more important to him than making sure his house is in order and his wife has food to eat. He sounds very self centered.

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Originally Posted by rabernet

I don't think you really DO want to leave him, or you wouldn't be making excuses for him. The fact that he's a felon already shows he has a history of making poor choices.

You also can't afford financially to be with him if he cares so little for you that getting pot is more important to him than making sure his house is in order and his wife has food to eat. He sounds very self centered.

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I so agree with this yall should be making choices together not him deciding what he is going to do with bill money..

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Originally Posted by PorcelainxDoll

In already in an efficiency. Cant get any smaller or cheaper. I jyst also have a lot if car and bank loans.. If I could get one or 2 of them payed off I could survive just fine on my own.
Plus I have to mention we got in a fight earlier about me wanting him to just sit and talk to me sometimes.

He burned off and has been gone for 2 hours.


Im sorry if I have caused comotion or anything. I am just a very sad and hurt woman for the last few days, and I really have no one else to vent to.
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Dude if youre just staying with him bc you need money from his income to help pay your bills but hes spending money on leisure stuff then that clearly negates the reason your with him. If thats the only reason you wanna be with someone then just find some rich dude and pretend your in love with him and use him for his money. I think they even have websites for stuff like that. Like "findmeasugardaddy.com" or something. lmao. Im not trying to be mean but from the facts youve given us and what youre saying it makes you sound stupid trying to defend or justify his actions.

I totally agree with what MrLang said. If he cant even sit down and talk to you then dont bother staying with him. Thats not a healthy relationship.