Forgiveness is overrated.
Rarely is it given, rarely is it deserved. Many things are, unconditionally, unforgivable.
I have no idea what your past holds that would garner harsh words and severe judgement from this community, but perhaps you deserve it and perhaps you don't. Whether you want to own your mistakes is up to you.
I generally don't believe in forgiveness, and I don't forget misdeeds of my own or others. No present or future action can erase the fact that previous actions occurred.
HOWEVER! A lack of forgiveness, deserved or not, or public humiliation and judgement flung like daggers is no barrier to making good choices in the future. What I do believe in is rehabilitation, and the ability for someone to turn their life around.
You should never think of turning your life around as forgetting your past, or having the rest of the world never know about it. It's all about your future choices and actions. Acknowledging past mistakes is the first step in not repeating them, and a great start on a path of making good choices from here on out.
A few simple rules to live by that may help:
- Never lie
- Never steal
- Never attack another person, verbally or physically
- NEVER COMPROMISE ON THESE THREE IDEALS
Sometimes living by the above is difficult or even painful, but it sure is simple and makes the task of figuring out if a choice is right or wrong pretty quick and easy.
Ten commandments are overrated, three or four can universally cover just about all cultures and societies.