blackcrystal22, enjoy your Dekayi, if you have any problems getting it to eat for you, send me a PM, I have worked with that species for years.
They are very personable snakes, and the defensive reactions you are getting will subside.
One thing though, Dump out that aquarium gravel, it's a poor choice of substrate.
They like sticky foods, so the very best thing to do when feeding is to remove the snake from it's housing and place it in a small poly tote with the food items.
Generally once they get used to you they will eat right from your hands.
There is no need to worry about cage heating either, they are a cool temperature snake that actually prefers room temperature and will rarely if ever bask.
First snakes I always see in the spring, and last snakes I ever see in the autumn.
http://www.reptard.info/pic/Xena.jpg