I messed up big time :( (advice appreciated...)

hey guys

Thanks for sharing your inputs.

As for the ex....oh yes. I'm soooo completely OVER her. She drew the line completely when she went nuts on me...twice (once when I said I forgave her without her apologizing...the second time when she found out that her friends have been talking to me). And from what I've seen from her, I bet you all that my wounds have completely healed from that terrible nightmare waiting to happen. :)

As for the new girl...that's the thing. I don't know how to tell her that the reason why I'm making these moves just now is because even though I was attracted to her from the very beginning, I could not coz I was still in love with the ex. Yep. The attraction was that strong...thankfully, I didn't act them out coz I know my commitments. And nope...I haven't contacted her again since she told me to stop. Until now, I still don't know how to tell her that she's no rebound nor a "way to get even" (which I believe is very lame...).

Don't worry; I don't know where she lives and I am definitely not in the mood to make a "stake out" (did I get that right?). hahaha

Seriuosly...I just feel that I messed up coz there's a potentially good start and I screwed it all up by getting carried away and now I never will have the chance to fix things since she told me to stop. :(

Learn from your mistakes.... You should have acted on the attraction when it presented itself, you already knew the one you were with was a nut job.


Dont explain anything to the new girl..... She will slip from your mind and it will be like she was never in it.

Move on to the next.......

I recommend that you just be single for a while. I noticed, with myself, in the past that when I left a bad relationship I took some baggage with myself. As a single guy with baggage your going to end up finding someone with qualities that most likely don't want(or ruining a good reltionship because you have baggage she doesn't want). Sit back and learn yourself, learn what YOU want in a woman. Life is short and you definately don't want to waste it wondering if you chose the "right" one. I have done the friend thing in the past, it didn't work out! Trust me girls have a way of getting into each others heads and just when you think she is the one......You guys are doing good.......You love the way she looks at you.....The ninja mind trick her friends(your ex) played on her will set in! I found my wife when I wasn't looking. Enough of my rant! Good luck on whatever you chose and I wish much happiness.:gj:

breakups are good times to get a dog.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by STEW

Learn from your mistakes.... You should have acted on the attraction when it presented itself, you already knew the one you were with was a nut job.


Dont explain anything to the new girl..... She will slip from your mind and it will be like she was never in it.

Move on to the next.......

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Actually....I couldn't. I was still with the ex at that time when we first met and I noticed these little things...and things weren't so crazy with the ex back then.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mainbutter

breakups are good times to get a dog.

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or another snake... :gj:

http://www.plentyoffish.com

Seriously, helped me with my breakup after 4 yrs.

Can I post that on here? I'm apologizing ahead of time if I'm not supposed to.

I agree to cut all ties with the ex. If the new girl has connections to your ex, she will always be in the middle of things. It's not worth the heart ache. Good luck!!

Don't mean to be the downer here but you might want to find a girl who would appreciate your attention if you're the kind of guy who likes to do really sweet things and focus on your partner. (I noticed that your ex broke up with you because "she can't love you the way you love her" and the new girl is a bit iffy because of your moves.) Some girls like the chase as much as the catch, they don't want to be pursued all the time (occasionally it ends up being creepy when the guy lavishes too much attention on them,) and would like to pursue as well (but not for too long, they'd like to see the fruits of their labor as well.) Yeah I know, complicated.

edit: I realized I read it wrong so here's the revised version.

So give her a little taste of what you could be and let her call/talk to you herself. Do sweet things, girls will notice if you hold doors/pull out chairs/walk on the outside of the sidewalk/guide them through a throng of people. Take charge while taking their comfort and feelings into account.

Hey, you never know. ;)

But if you truly want something, always go for it with everything you have. Don't let something as foolish as fear stop you in the face of love.

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Just my two cents, because people are fickle, unpredictable things. Especially girls.

going out with an ex's friend is/can be a bad idea. it'll only cause problems between you and your ex. move on to a completely new girl so you wont get crap from other girls that might know your ex. know what im sayin?

Your ex is obviously crazy, the other girl is a tool if she asked you to stop because of your ex.

theres plenty of other girls out there. go make new friends, tell your friends to have partys, best way to meet people imo, go to places you can relate to people (like reptile expos :) ), i donno what your other hobbies are, but go be social. you make new friends, it leads to new social groups and that means more girls to get to know. find one thats not crazy this time ok?