Todays Laughs:

>
>
>Subject: Tide- what a product
>
>Dear Tide,
>
>I'm writing to say what an excellent product you
>have! I've used it all through my married life, as my Mom always
>told me it was the best.
>
>Now that I am in my fifties, I find it even better!
>
>In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my
>new white blouse. My inconsiderate and uncaring husband
>started to berate me about how clumsy I was, and generally
>started becoming a pain in the neck.
>
>One thing led to another and somehow I ended up with
>a lot of his blood on my white blouse. I tried to get the
>stain out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn't
>come out.
>
>After a quick trip to the supermarket, I purchased a bottle of
>liquid Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and
>satisfaction, all of the stains came out! In fact, the stains
>came out so well the Detectives who came by yesterday told me
>that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative and then my
>attorney called and said that I would no longer be considered
>a suspect in the disappearance of my husband.
>
>What a relief! Going through menopause is bad enough without
>being a murder suspect! I thank you, once again, for having
>such a great product. Well, got to go. I have to write a letter to
>the Hefty bag people.
>



Subject: Fw: Dan Rather on Politics
>
>Dan Rather of CBS news was seated next to little Tommy on the plane
when
>Rather turned to the boy and said, "Let's talk, I've heard that flights
go
>quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passengers.
>Little Tommy, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and said
to
>Rather, "What would you like to discuss?"
>"Oh, I don't know" said Rather, "How about politics? Should we keep
Bush
>as president or elect Kerry?"
>"OK" said Little Tommy, "That could be an interesting topic but let me
>ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat grass. The
same
>stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out flat
>pattys
> and a horse excretes clumps of dried grass. Why do you think that
is?"
>"Jeez" said Rather, "I have no idea."
>"Well then" said Little Tommy, How is it you feel qualified to discuss
>who should run this country when you don't know chit?"
>
>

lol I am glad I use Tide. Always handy to have around the house, I guess.