I need to vent.

Hey guys,

This past weekend, my husband and I brought home two new snakes from Tinley Park. Everyone close to us knew that we already had 3 snakes in our home. This trip was also our honeymoon, by the way.

We are now getting slammed with comments from family members and friends, saying things like, "you are crazy, I am never coming over", "YUCK!", "some romantic honeymoon, looking at snakes", "you need to get a life", "your snakes will kill your cats", and more. Neither of us push our love for snakes on anyone and don't bring them up to people who aren't fond of them. We wait until they say something. We are getting so sick of hearing this from people, mostly family members and are to the point that we don't want anything to do with them. Neither of us says anything negative about the things they love that aren't for us.

We've even tried educating them (slowly), about snakes and reptiles in general. Thanks for letting me vent, it's nice to be able to talk to people who have the same interest that we do and understand.

Im sorry to hear about your family acting that way. I got real lucky and my family has an interest in snakes, hence where I got my interest. Have you thought of telling each person how it makes you feel when they same negative things about the things you love so much? You can't be too hard on them if you don't set them straight. Now if they continue afterwards, then there is absolutly no excuse. I would try telling them it hurts though and ask them to please stop with the comments. Good luck

Edit: I meant family and friends since you said everyone close to you.

Hey Courtney,

That's what I am planning on doing. I guess I don't understand how people can be SO rude when it comes to a hobby... in this case, herps. It's not like I take my snakes to their homes and jump out of dark corners with them. I don't even take the snakes out at all when those people are over, and only one of them is kept in our living room, the rest have their own bedroom (spoiled snakes!). The one in the living room is a Ball, too, so it's not like you can even see him!

Andrea,

Very sorry to hear that your family is reacting that way, I've been through it and I just got to the point where I can only just laugh at or ignore the rude comments. It never really stops, at least it hasn't for me. But like Courtney says you need to tell them that the way they are acting is hurting you. It's a hobby that you love, and they are downgrading you for it. In the end if they still have a problem with it, fine, they can not come over it's their problem.

I've gotten used to it now. My family is the same. Only one brother visits me now. Everybody else, including my parents, does not come to visit me anymore. No biggie. I knew it was gonna be that way when we got the snakes. I can completely understand because I used to be one of them.

Even within the snake community you encounter the same prejudices. Do you know how many ball python owners tell me my spider shouldn't be bred because he is defective? Or how stupid I am for feeding live? Or idiotic for having glass tanks? You should check out the British forums...

We can't really control what other people think/do. We can only control how we react. I choose to see it from their perspective and then try to find ways to change it so it gets closer to my own perspective of things - or at least, for them to be able to understand my perspective even if they disagree.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Charlie And Lucy

...It's not like I take my snakes to their homes and jump out of dark corners with them....

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:D This made me laugh so hard! Thank you, I really needed that today

Sometimes you can try the "killing them with kindness" thing.

Some people honestly don't realize how hurtful such comments are.

For the others.......

Well, for those people you say, yes as a matter of fact it WAS a romantic honeymoon, and you should drop by on Saturday, we're going to watch some snake porn before we make love!

Some people there is just no making see reason, so if they think your crazy, you might as well go all out!

Gale

Wow, I think I could have written this myself. My parents think I am COMPLETELY crazy, and I am sure think they are going to get a call one day that my child was eaten by a snake (which, could NEVER happen.... unless suddenly our kingsnake became a killer since he's our biggest). These are also the same people who think our dog, Luna, who is a pit rescue, will eat my 2 year old... because aren't all pits baby eaters???

Since I have decided to go into breeding BP's, I have also decided that this is going to be my basement hobby. The racks, a freezer with mice, and all my needed supplies will be down there, and no one has to see it. And plus, temps are easier to control down there!

People already think I am crazy without knowing about the snakes....:banana::banana::banana:

I deal with this as well. Try having 100+ and getting people to come over for Christmas parties. Here's how I handle it. When people make those kinds of comments I simply laugh and tell them that I'm afraid of spiders so I understand then move on. It never fails me and the wife have a running bet, we each guess how long it will take for someone to ask where they are. It never fails they always ask.

You have alternative pets and as a result you get non-standard reactions to them it's just part of the game.



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You all are so awesome, thanks for helping me feel better!

A family member told me tonight again to not let my snakes eat my babies (my cats). I almost said that we already tried feeding our snakes the cats but they refused. Add fuel to the fire :rolleyes:

geekpythongirl, I envy your basement. I can't wait till my husband and I have a house. Half of the basement will be remodeled for the snakes. We'd like to breed, as well. Oh, and WELCOME!! You'll love it here at BP.net :D

Freakie_frog, you are right, they always ask. "the snakes aren't out roaming around... are they?" Yeah, they are... infact, I lost a burmese python around here a few weeks ago. I still don't know where she is... and she's hungry! :rolleye2: It is SO hard not to spout off.

angllady2, you are classic :D

shescountry89, thank you for the advice. I like how you think. Oh, and I wish I could have met you at the show in Tinley Park. I saw you were there, but I think I read that Sunday after the show. :(

anatess, looks like we are sailing the same boat, huh? At least we aren't alone :)

Courtney281, next time I jump out of a dark corner with a snake, I will be sure to have you there watching! :D


Seriously, you all have helped me a lot. Reminds me once again why I love being a part of BP.net, and the reptile community!