I need help and to talk to someone.

[hungba]

This is going to be long, but please bear with me. I really need other reptile keepers to talk to about this.

I have been keeping animals (mostly reptiles) since I was a child. I took some years off during my later high school and college years but afterwards started again with an iguana 11 years ago. Like many other reptile keepers, my "collection" for want of a better term, has grown. In the past few years, I also started breeding (skink, snakes, geckos) and must say I have been rather successful, even creating world firsts as far as morphs go. I guess I should be happy about this, but the number of animals has increased exponentially.

I do take good care of my animals, but the amount of work, food bills, vet bills and time invested has increased very much and if you talked to me some months ago, I would never admit this, but it just no longer feels fun anymore. It feels like a lot of stress and I have neglected all other aspects of my life outside work and my animals. For example, just a few years ago, I was a competitive athlete. I now no longer even exercise. I have never been very social, but I honestly can't even remember the last time I have been to a social meeting with anyone except immediate family on birthdays etc. I am getting rid of human furniture to make room for more cages and racks. I also have boxes and boxes of equipment from past years that I am saving in case I need it for future animals, that I dont want to throw out (maybe I should?) but didn't bother listing to sell them because what am I going to get for a bunch of old tubs or second hand rock dishes? Make a trip out to collect $10? This isn't working.

Today, after months of vet treatment (since april), my 3 Mali uromastyx were finally given a clean bill of health from the vet. I came home feeling peaceful, only to see that one of my skinks seem lethargic and I probably need to go to the vet yet again. That felt like a "last straw" to me.

I still do love animals, and even the other day my mother commented how excited I was just seeing a house gecko at her house. I am not thinking of stopping altogether, but I think I really need to cut back. I am almost reluctant to say this because it sounds like my dad when I was a kid when I just had a few turtles, but it has grown to that point that he may actually be right.

But I don't know what to do. I am so attached to them I don't know if I can decide which ones to sell/rehome. There is plenty of demand but I just can not decide what to keep and what to sell. I look at my frogs and they are all different colors and if I sell all but one or two, which ones do I keep? I have skinks that I can sell some, but which one? They are all equally lovable.

Also, it would seem that to significantly reduce the workload/cost, I should really be selling all of a certain class of animal. Like, sell all insectivores if I don't want to keep live prey, or all frogs for example. For example, I have an air conditioned room dedicated to caudates and things needing cool temperatures in the summer. A warm room for snakes etc. If I sell 90% of all the ones in the cool room, I would STILL need to pay the bills for the air conditioning. If I sell half of all my cricket eaters, I would STILL need to make that trip to buy crickets etc.

Has anyone else gone through this? I know something must be done, but not sure how to get started, and indeed don't want to! Should I just sell one or two to "get the ball rolling"?

Please help.

[hungba]

To add, if I wanted more room in my house for other things, and wanted to reduce the number of cages, I would need to sell all animals from that stack of cages. If I sold one from this stack of cages and one from that rack etc, I would not reclaim any room at all! It would be the same with a few empty slots! It is hard enough to decide which ones I can let go emotionally alone. My head wants to explode.

Should I just start anywhere and get the ball rolling?

I am also scared that I will regret this. But this just isn' t working.

I also feel embarrassed.

[Jeanne]

It sounds like you have decisions that only you are capable of making. You know your financial and space situation. Unfortunately, one can get themselves into a problem and find they are in too deep as you have.

You will need to decide. I dnt know that any of us can give you advice on this..other than, now that you know there is a problem..fix it. You will have to let go of some.

Best wishes!

Sent from my VS980 4G using Tapatalk

[bcr229]

It sounds you're getting overwhelmed and you've recognized that for your own sanity you need to downsize. There's nothing wrong with that! Unfortunately this means making some tough decisions. You also have to decide which of the three goals you've listed - decreasing your workload so you can spend more time enjoying your animals or other pursuits, reducing your expenditures, or reclaiming space in your home - are the most important.

I can't help you pick and choose which animals to keep and which to rehome. I will suggest that to make it easier on yourself you have the new owner sign a first right of refusal contract with you, where if the new owner can't keep the animal any more it must be offered back to you first, at the price that was paid for it, or the new owner must pay you $X. That way you can at least filter out flippers and you'll know the critter landed in a good long-term home.

[hungba]

I don't think anyone here will sign anything. The culture is very different here than in the West.

I don't really expect anyone to help me decide which ones to keep or not keep. I am just sure that being as addictive as this hobby is, I am sure that I am not the only one to have found myself in this situation. I just want to see if anyone who has been through this maybe able to tell me how they overcame the obstacles and decisions I am facing? How did one even start? Just start anywhere?

[hungba]

Regarding signing the thing, I think I probably want to find a good owner and say goodbye once with finality. Don't want the "maybe they will come back to me" thought.

[Nellasaur]

You also have to decide which of the three goals you've listed - decreasing your workload so you can spend more time enjoying your animals or other pursuits, reducing your expenditures, or reclaiming space in your home - are the most important.

I think this is great advice as to how/where to start. If you prioritize what it is you want to change, that'll give you a good starting point when it comes to choosing who and what to eliminate.

Alternatively, you could always prioritize what's most important to you to keep in your collection. What animals are you most interested in working with? Which ones are easiest on you to take care of? Which ones are most rewarding to handle, or make you feel happiest to see flourish?

I suspect your best bet is going to be to sit with this for a little while and sort of figure out what's most important to you in both directions-- in reclaiming the balance of your life and in continuing to get enjoyment out of what you do keep from your collection.

I don't envy you having to make this decision at all, by the way. I hope it goes as easily as it possibly can for you.

[dkatz4]

First of all, don't be embarrassed. If you let the hobby affect you too deeply mentally, physically, or financially you'll find yourself unable to care for any animals at all; you are doing the right thing.
I think your strategy of rehoming entire rooms is a smart one. Whether you move all your cold weather animals or just a few it's still going to hurt, so why endure it without reaping th maximum benefit?
also, once you make the decision to move forward, remember why you are doing it, don't let yourself get caught up trying to make money. It sounds like you have a very valuable collection, but if you're really doing this purely to allieviate yourself to of the burden, price them to sell. Fixating on the money is an easy way to avoid following brought with your plan.
Good luck

[treaux]

As a chronic hobbyist, if you feel like you need to cut back, then you probably should. Sounds like you've got a good plan to make your collection more manageable, which in turn should make you enjoy what you have more. There is always a tipping point with most hobbies (especially those involving live creatures) where it can become more work than fun. You sound like you've reached it.

[voodoolamb]

I completely understand where you are coming from! Several years ago I was breeding tarantulas and beardies as well as feeders for everyone! Plus I had various other exotics that were pets. It got to be more of a chore than fun and I had to downsize and eventually take a break from the hobby all together. Now I'm picking it back up with the ball pythons

It may seem silly - but have you tried making a list of the things you love vs the things you hate about the hobby? Then cross referencing each species you keep. 1 point for them fulfilling a "love" item and minus one point for a "hate" item (minus 2 points for a hate item might be better) and then seeing which ones score the best?

For me seeing things written down help me be more objective and less sentimental.