What if your Sig. Other doesnt like the Herp Obsession?

[Monster Dodge]

Me and my daughter love reptiles, primarily the BP craze thats going on. However my wife... not so much...lol In fact she cant stand it and is completely freaked out by any type of snake/reptile.
I'd like her to become more into the hobby but I dont know how to go about doing it. I've taken her to shows with me. We watch alot of documentaries on the subject but in the end she is just not cool with it and thinks were crazy

She has it programmed in her head that all snakes and reptiles are evil creatures that just want to devour humans and take over the planet
What would any of you who have delt with something similar propose?

[jarradw]

I hope to watch this and find the same answer. I have the same issue with my wife

[Egapal]

Me and my daughter love reptiles, primarily the BP craze thats going on. However my wife... not so much...lol In fact she cant stand it and is completely freaked out by any type of snake/reptile.
I'd like her to become more into the hobby but I dont know how to go about doing it. I've taken her to shows with me. We watch alot of documentaries on the subject but in the end she is just not cool with it and thinks were crazy

She has it programmed in her head that all snakes and reptiles are evil creatures that just want to devour humans and take over the planet
What would any of you who have delt with something similar propose?

Ask her questions. Why does she feel the way she feels. I did not use the word think for a reason. This is not a rational thought, its an irrational thought causing a feeling. Once you have some idea why she feels the way she does you can try and change those feelings. Ask if she has any questions, any at all. She might have some questions that she feels stupid asking. Don't be pushy. Don't tell her that her thoughts are irrational and don't discount her feelings. I like to compare ball pythons to cats. Cats are way more likely to scratch you or bite you than a BP and the pain is much worse. At the end of the day she might not like BP but you might be able to get rid of the fear or misconceptions. With the cat comparison people often say, well my cat shows me affection. To which I say, my snake is lower maintenance and out of the ordinary. We each of things we value about our animal but the issue that most people have is fear. Once that's gone what we have left is that I have a snake you don't particularly want. No different from a person who has fish and another person not seeing the point.

Good Luck

[Jay_Bunny]

I'm kind of in the same boat. My husband doesn't really care for snakes. In fact, not too long ago he even admitted that he used to be scared of snakes, even while I had them and that he "got over it" to make me happy. He now allows me to keep whatever reptiles I choose, but he doesn't like to really help out and doesn't care about all the "cool new morphs" and info I find on reptiles.

If your wife is not comfortable with snakes or other reptiles, I'd be careful about bringing them into the house. While I don't think your wife would do anything to harm the snakes, you also don't want to make her uncomfortable. My husband knows where the snakes are, how many I'm breeding, and he's comfortable with that, and has even held a few on occasion, but for the most part, he doesn't want anything to do with them. If you wife can be in a similar situation where she is comfortable about them being in the house as long as you don't chase her around the house with them, then you should be fine. If she can get to the point of liking them, even better.

But it may come to a point where you realize she is never going to have a interest in reptiles like you have. Heck you are actually doing better than I am. If I ask my husband to come to a show with me, he gives me this face and says "Do I have to?" and usually ends up finding something else to occupy his time while I go with friends.

[mdjudson]

I dealt with the same stuff... not as extreme but my wife was never really fond of it. What changed her was when the first clutch hatched. Now she has her own snake (a normal male out of the clutch). I would say patience is the best route to take. Don't force it on her and eventually she will come around(hopefully)

[Monster Dodge]

She's cool on the fact that I can pretty much do what ever I want to do and have what ever I want to have. As long as I keep everything clean and theres no chance of escape then she's cool with me having Ball Pythons or whatever.
I just kind of wanted her to show interest ya know? Its always more fun when someone else shares your interest
My daughter is 5 so theres not a whole lot she can help me with right now but it is fun talking to her and explaining stuff to her. She is like a huge sponge who just wants to "Absorb" as much information as she can

[anatess]

I'm like your wife. I'm scared of them.

I'm okay with them now - although I'm still scared of them - don't ask me why, I just am. I very rarely handle the snakes. The rats are my pets.

For over 10 years I've been telling my husband 'No'. But, I finally gave in when this Reptile Store opened a few miles from the house and I saw how kids were holding the snakes without a problem.

[LOSTCOAST_BALLZ]

im in the same boat my gf doesnt care for them but she does help. for instance she fed 4 snakes 2 times for me while i was gone. I jsut had to buy the 16 inch metal plier things lol which are amazing i might add. anyways I feel your pain though she gets over whelmed by them some times like my baby butter struck and hit her hand didnt bite her though and well thats the end of the helping she said LOL. but after 3 years of dealing with reptiles BD, to balls she is starting to actually come around. in the beginning she sounded very similar to your situation. good luck I agree with not pressureing or pushing it though, some people shut down.

[Egapal]

I'm like your wife. I'm scared of them.

I'm okay with them now - although I'm still scared of them - don't ask me why, I just am. I very rarely handle the snakes. The rats are my pets.

For over 10 years I've been telling my husband 'No'. But, I finally gave in when this Reptile Store opened a few miles from the house and I saw how kids were holding the snakes without a problem.

This is a good point. I breed gerbils for feeders and my partner has accepted them. She will check on them if she sees I haven't yet around their bed time. She is interested in the colors I am breeding and will tell me what order they need to be fed off in. She picks who gets to be the future breeders. For the most part she gets her way with the gerbils unless there is a good reason not to do it her way. In those cases I explain what my thoughts are and she understands. Only time will tell. Be thankful you have a daughter that is interested.

[Monster Dodge]

I'm okay with them now - although I'm still scared of them - don't ask me why, I just am. I very rarely handle the snakes.

I guess because like most people they have it in there mindset that snakes are only out to bite you. The media plays a big roll on this with all of there shows nowadays (Fatal Attractions, Python Hunters, etc...)

The last show I was at, I held this amazing looking bumble bee morph that snapped at my hand and proceeded to twist.... I just kinda laughed and was like Owwwwwch....lol
My wife completely freaked out like it was a Western Diamondback that just tagged me

After that she was like screw this so...... I dunno