The Joys of Owning Snakes

I had just finished dinner, and decided to spend some time with my cat and my corn snake Maize. I took Maize out of the tank and let her crawl around my hands as I sat on the couch. Simian the cat curled up in my lap and watched Maize move through my fingers. After a few minutes, Simian fell asleep and Maize continued to slither through my fingers. Suddenly I smelled an incredible stench, and gobs of black poop started oozing from Maize. I didn't want to get any of it on the upholstery, so I cupped my hands and held my breath. My eyes were watering. I could feel poop sliding down my fingers. I tried to catch all of it, so it didn't end up on the carpet or the couch. I could feel it running down my arm and into my sleeve. So there I was siting on the couch with two hands full of snake poop and a sleeping cat on my lap.

With no hands free to move the cat, or open Maize's tank, I looked around for a solution. Maize started crawling up my arm. I was trying to move the cat by swinging my legs back and forth, but the cat just dug in, so I was sitting on the couch getting clawed by the cat, while holding two handfuls of poop, some of which was running down my arm. Finally I just stood up and ran for the bathroom. The cat panicked and dug in deeper. I could feel him slamming against my legs with every step. Finally he jumped off and hissed at me as he ran away. I got to the bathroom and of course the door was closed. By this time maize was wrapped around my arm leaving a trail of putrid poop on my sleeve. I had just my thumbs to open the door with. It was pretty difficult, but I managed somehow.

I ran over to the toilet and opened my hands. The poop slid off and into the bowl. I used my elbow to get the sink turned on and washed my hands. Finally I stripped Maize off of my arm, took her to her cage and put her back in. I took off my clothes, threw them in the washer and took a shower. By the time I got out the cat seemed to have forgiven my and was crawling around my legs, marking his territory with the scent glands under his chin.

I decided to get my ball python Delphi and spend some time with her. I took her out of her hide, and set her in the palm of hand before I went over to the couch and sat down. She slowly unballed herself and started crawling up my arm as Simian hopped up into my lap. I started reading a few posts on this forum. I don't know if it was the smell of the other snakes poop, or just some cruel coincidence but, when I looked down, Delphi's tail was straight up in the air and a stinking log of poop was clinging to my wrist. As she crawled the log of poop slowly grew until it was half the length of the my forearm.

I thought the corn snake smelled bad, she has mice in her for a few days. Delphi had been storing this for six or seven weeks. Putrid does not begin to describe the smell. The cat woke up, and fled the room. Balancing the log of pooh on my forearm, I ran to the bathroom and wondered why I had closed the door? Hadn't I learned anything? At least this time I had a hand free. This time the poop was too sticky to fall into the toilet. I had to scrape it off. I washed my hands, grabbed Delphi off of my shoulder and took her back to her cage. More clothes in the washer, another shower, and here I am, sitting in my robe typing this story. The cats is sitting next to me, eyeing me with some trepidation. I am wondering if I should try to hold my BCI?

Probably not.

David

Lol funny.

Aw man...tht sux lol! & I would definitely NOT handle anymore snakes!

You really have to learn the art of reading sausage butt. Lmao.

:rofl:This sounds like my life. Ah, TY, I needed a giggle. Note to self, leave bathroom door open!

Just don't go holding anything bigger. Retic sized poops would take out the kitty.

This is the best getting pooped on story I have ever read! Man did it make me laugh. I really needed a good laugh today. Thanks for that.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by anicatgirl

:rofl:This sounds like my life. Ah, TY, I needed a giggle. Note to self, leave bathroom door open!

Just don't go holding anything bigger. Retic sized poops would take out the kitty.

---

Sadly I live in New York so I can't have retics any more. Besides I don't think I would hang out with a retic and the cat at the same time, the cat could become poop. LOL

Oh my goodness!! This was better than being-pooped-on-by-children stories! I would have gone for broke and gotten the other snake out, ha!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by lizzy_troy

Oh my goodness!! This was better than being-pooped-on-by-children stories! I would have gone for broke and gotten the other snake out, ha!

---

Just put him away. No poop tonight.

Hilarious!! :rofl: I giggled throughout the entire story! Why can't they be potty trained, right? :rofl: