How to make my snake more comfortable with me, less scared?

[CakeLike]

I haven't been able to interact often with my snoot recently (his name is snoodles.. :>

I am so busy with work that I am away often and when I am home I am too exhausted to get him out of the enclosure.
But when I have to, he seems still very scared of me. I lift the hide up and he tenses up immediately and stares at me in an s position. He is not really defensive, has never tried to bite me or anything, hissed at me once when in shed but that was my fault I bothered him. Then he freezes and just stares at me all tense. Then I proceed to grab him by his body and he twitches away as soon as I touch him. Then I grab him and pull him onto my hand.
He then is eather very still and doesn't move a minute or so or he is extremely jumpy and tries to climb over my hand and arms.

Eather way, I am sad he is still so uncomfortable. I have had him 4 months now I think. And I am afraid he will get used to being so shy and opposed to human touch when he's older. He is already getting bigger and thicker. He's a fine eating boy . But honestly, once he's double the size and as thick as my little arm and still stares me down and focuses on me so intensely I might take a step back.

In a month I won't be so busy anymore and I would try taking him out 3 times a week or so to make more progress. Will they ever not flinch away from a touch?

Any more tips would be appreciated. Thanks.

[plateOfFlan]

I think I've only had BPs for about as long as you have so I'm no expert, but when you first lift the hide or whatever I think their reaction at first is always going to be like "what is happening" until they realize it's you. Mine both look up in that S-shape until they smell me or I give them a small pet, not sure how they recognize me but it's not by sight. I also have never had luck sitting with either in my lap - something about sitting still and looking at them they find unnerving I think. They'll just sit still and not explore. I have found if I take them on my forearm, close to my body, and start walking casually around the house, even tidying up and stuff with my other hand, they calm down faster, I think because my attention is not on them and there are interesting smells and things happening. When I do that both of them will quickly uncurl and start looking around and tongue flicking curiously. But I think it's different for each snake, some might like sitting quietly, others might prefer to do other things.

[Bogertophis]

I take offense to the term "grab" so perhaps your snake does also. Predators "grab"- friends don't.

When you lift up a snake's hide, they're startled & feel exposed & un-safe, to say the least. Give them a few minutes to realize it's you before trying to pick them up: First, give them your scent & gentle touch- use an empty sleeve, for example- so they can recognize you, which snakes have trouble doing with just vision alone. The more empathy you have with how your snake really feels, the better your handling will go.

I agree with plateOfFlan's post too, that snakes relax when we stroll around with them so they can take in new scents- rather than just being stared at by us (as a predator might do!).

If you want a snake to trust you, you have to trust them too, & you have to earn their trust. It's doesn't happen with a "grab". Keep your hand low & softly touch your snake mid-body, then gently lift him/her up while supporting their body well, & cuddle them to your mid-section- they're more afraid when out in the open, & feel safer when next to something. They learn to feel safe next to us.

[CakeLike]

I do take him gently I just worded it confusingly maybe. But once my hand is in the cage I do try to pick him up quickly since I don't want to give him the opportunity to focus on my hand more than is good for me.
I have been wondering for a long time if snakes have memory. Every time I get into his space he seems like it's never happend before. Doesn't he remember that I did this many times already and that he's still alive after?

[Bogertophis]

I do take him gently I just worded it confusingly maybe. But once my hand is in the cage I do try to pick him up quickly since I don't want to give him the opportunity to focus on my hand more than is good for me.
I have been wondering for a long time if snakes have memory. Every time I get into his space he seems like it's never happend before. Doesn't he remember that I did this many times already and that he's still alive after?

Maybe he's trying to forget the previous times, lol. Rushing snakes (when trying to handle) is rude & scary for them. It's what PREDATORS do. It's what the "bad-guys" do. He won't learn to trust you until you learn to trust him too...communicate your good intentions. No quick pick-ups!

If you want a friend, you have to act like a friend. If you're too chicken, put gloves on for a while. Or just give him something besides your hand to sniff first, something that doesn't smell like anything he'd eat, so he gets the idea that dinner has NOT arrived.

[Mr. Misha]

Definitely no fast pickups. Those would scare the crap out of your boop. Especially, if you two are new to each other.

The reality is that regardless of how harmless the bite is, it's not good for you or your BP. The last thing you want is your BP injuring their teeth. I'd recommend getting a hook. Once you slowly remove the hide, very very gently boop your snakey's nose with the hook. I also recommend picking up your BP from behind.

I personally have this hook: https://www.reptilebasics.com/hooks-...el-snake-hook/

Some might think it's an overkill, but I rather avoid any unpleasant accidents, especially with some of my BPs that have an aggressive feeding instinct.

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[EL-Ziggy]

I’m more of a get ‘er done kinda fellow. When it’s time to go, it’s time to go. Fortunately none of my snakes are too shy anymore but even when they were smaller I just gently tapped them with the hook and then quickly & confidently swooped them up. I try not to give them much of a chance to get in a defensive striking position. They might be a little flighty at first but they tend to mellow out after a few minutes. Two of my snakes were pretty defensive as young ones. If I approached them too cautiously and slowly I was sure to get tagged.

[Armiyana]

This little guy has had a few rough experiences with you as well.... so It's natural for him to be a bit nervous. At least I think this is the same one with the healing head and vent issues? It's poking and prodding that he doesn't want when you treated him or when you're trying to get better looks at the spots.

What I've found is that it will take time and patience. Sometimes they won't really settle until they're older. One of my BPs is VERY defensive and she's only settled down now that she's hit 4 years. Most of the others warm up around that year mark if they were super flighty babies. Keep in mind that these little guys like to hole up in tight little burrows in the wild. It's in their nature to want to be alone in a comfortable small space. They don't always want to be out and about where we are.

I don't try to do anything special or force them into anything. When I go to pick the little ones up, it's always a confident, but not grabby hand from the back, never from the front where they see it coming overhead. If you're nervous about reaching in, a light touch on the side with a snake hook before gently working it under a coil midbody to help lift them out is also something you can try.
A few minutes of light handling to check on the body condition and health. Maybe a bit of supervised carpet time for the older ones to stretch out and get a little bit of outside time. I have 2 that will settle down and wrap my wrist a little to just chill. Most of the others prefer to be out and about a little before going home.

[Zincubus]

Just raise the hide slowly , look where his head is then carefully get hold him from behind .. lift slowly then try and sit down as soon as possible

Rest him on your lap and they normally calm right down .. exploring nervously .
Let him move a little then keep dragging him back to your lap ..

He will soon realise that YOU are a safe place . They quite often just curl up on your lap after about 5 minutes .


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