I need your opinion

[MeMe]

ok so I am really looking for your opinion on a crappy situation I am in.


So as you know...I own a Pitbull, Sway. She is very good with people but not so much with other animals..outside of the ones in my house.

A friend of mine started coming over and hanging out with me and she started bringing her Pug. I would ALWAYS make sure both my dogs were pinned up when she came over as I knew...she would bring her Pug.

I have told her numerous times to call me when she is on her way over so I could put my dogs away since they don't like other dogs. She doesn't.

I specifically told her from the beginning, like months ago...SWAY DOES NOT LIKE OTHER ANIMALS SHE TRIES TO FIGHT THEM. I would tell her when she came over that it made me very nervous when she would bring the dog(s). She still did.

I thought if I siad that ..she would at the very least...be careful when bringing them over.

Well...last week she came over and no doubt...brought her Pug annnnd...her new 1/2 pound Chihuahua. She did NOT call me when she was on her way.

Sway was in Sara's room because I had the kitten in mine. My friend came to the door and Kyle let her in...She let her dog walk in by her side. I was in my bedroom and did not even know she came in. She came down the hall and Sara heard someone in the house so she opened her door to see who it was and that was it. Sway saw the Pug sitting in front of my bedroom door with me in in it and she rolled the Pug...she put a few puncture wounds on the Pug but nothing that looked too bad. I heard the noise and within seconds I was out there and it was over.

So she looked over her dog and said it only looked like a small mark on his side. We cleaned it and that was it.

I went to her house on saturday night and she shows me this knot...the size of a softball on his chest. I freaked! I had NO idea Sway had even bit him there! I told her she needed to get him to a vet that it looked way bad and needed to be checked. She blew it off and said he is acting normal to not worry.

*Even after all this happened she still brought the dogs over here.

So yesterday morning I got a text that she had to take the dog to the vet and it has an abcess on his chest from where Sway had bit him. He had to undergo surgery and they tubed him for a couple days for the abcess to drain.

Here's the deal.

When she told me about this I was in the middle of getting my kids ready for their first day of school so I made my apologies for Sway and told her I felt horrible. After I got them to school and was able to sit for a minute and think and I started to really worry...like about Roscoe and how that poor pup was in pain. However...I could not find it in me to be mad at Sway...She was protecting her home!

So I called her back and told her that I was terribly sorry that he got bit but that I am not taking any action towards Sway...because she was well within her rights in her home. But I was sorry for the situation in a whole.

I also told her that I could not afford to contribute to the bill right now since I just sent off 3 kids to school and I have other financial obligations. But I would help her in any way I can to take care of the dog and get him better. I never said I wouldn't give her any money...just not now.

So she sends me a myspace message yesterday that said how she feels we should have to repay her for at least...half of the medical bills.

Before I tell you what I said..I would like to know what you would say/do?

This is your dog..in your house...that bit another dog...and you didn't even KNOW this other dog was in your house.

[mooingtricycle]

NOPE

She came over unannounced, and after being told REPEATEDLY NOT to bring the dog/s over. I would 100% ignore it, and also probably stop speaking to said person, if they cannot even respect MY rules in MY house.

[MeMe]

NOPE

She came over unannounced, and after being told REPEATEDLY NOT to bring the dog/s over. I would 100% ignore it, and also probably stop speaking to said person, if they cannot even respect MY rules in MY house.

well now..I never said to her "Don't bring them here" I gave many...very NOT so subtle hints to her about it.

She did tell me she was coming over, sometime that day...but I told her to call when she was ACUTALLY on her way so I could make sure my dogs were up.

Sway was up. but as I said...the only one that knew she had entered the house was Kyle. Not any adult.

[JLC]

Well...first off....if it were me, that person would not have been welcomed back into my home after consistently showing so little respect or courtesy.

Had it gone that far though, I would certainly not feel responsible for any of the vet bills. And I don't think any court would hold you responsible either....unless you got the one bad judge who was entirely biggoted against pits.

If this person were such a dear and close friend that all previous and continuing lack of respect and courtesy is always forgotten, then I might offer to help pay some of the bills I can, just out of the goodness of my heart and to help out a friend. But to my way of seeing it, from what you've posted here...you are in no way legally or morally responsible to do so.

[BT41042]

ok so I am really looking for your opinion on a crappy situation I am in.


So as you know...I own a Pitbull, Sway. She is very good with people but not so much with other animals..outside of the ones in my house.

A friend of mine started coming over and hanging out with me and she started bringing her Pug. I would ALWAYS make sure both my dogs were pinned up when she came over as I knew...she would bring her Pug.

I have told her numerous times to call me when she is on her way over so I could put my dogs away since they don't like other dogs. She doesn't.

I specifically told her from the beginning, like months ago...SWAY DOES NOT LIKE OTHER ANIMALS SHE TRIES TO FIGHT THEM. I would tell her when she came over that it made me very nervous when she would bring the dog(s). She still did.

I thought if I siad that ..she would at the very least...be careful when bringing them over.

Well...last week she came over and no doubt...brought her Pug annnnd...her new 1/2 pound Chihuahua. She did NOT call me when she was on her way.

Sway was in Sara's room because I had the kitten in mine. My friend came to the door and Kyle let her in...She let her dog walk in by her side. I was in my bedroom and did not even know she came in. She came down the hall and Sara heard someone in the house so she opened her door to see who it was and that was it. Sway saw the Pug sitting in front of my bedroom door with me in in it and she rolled the Pug...she put a few puncture wounds on the Pug but nothing that looked too bad. I heard the noise and within seconds I was out there and it was over.

So she looked over her dog and said it only looked like a small mark on his side. We cleaned it and that was it.

I went to her house on saturday night and she shows me this knot...the size of a softball on his chest. I freaked! I had NO idea Sway had even bit him there! I told her she needed to get him to a vet that it looked way bad and needed to be checked. She blew it off and said he is acting normal to not worry.

*Even after all this happened she still brought the dogs over here.

So yesterday morning I got a text that she had to take the dog to the vet and it has an abcess on his chest from where Sway had bit him. He had to undergo surgery and they tubed him for a couple days for the abcess to drain.

Here's the deal.

When she told me about this I was in the middle of getting my kids ready for their first day of school so I made my apologies for Sway and told her I felt horrible. After I got them to school and was able to sit for a minute and think and I started to really worry...like about Roscoe and how that poor pup was in pain. However...I could not find it in me to be mad at Sway...She was protecting her home!

So I called her back and told her that I was terribly sorry that he got bit but that I am not taking any action towards Sway...because she was well within her rights in her home. But I was sorry for the situation in a whole.

I also told her that I could not afford to contribute to the bill right now since I just sent off 3 kids to school and I have other financial obligations. But I would help her in any way I can to take care of the dog and get him better. I never said I wouldn't give her any money...just not now.

So she sends me a myspace message yesterday that said how she feels we should have to repay her for at least...half of the medical bills.

Before I tell you what I said..I would like to know what you would say/do?

This is your dog..in your house...that bit another dog...and you didn't even KNOW this other dog was in your house.

Hate to hear that MeMe...You know I own Pitbulls as well - I had a situation similar to yours years ago back in Louisiana...My male pretty much mauled a Black Lab in my yard...I felt horrible just like you but the owner of the Lab took responsibility for his dog being loose...

If I were you - I'd be polite and just tell it like it is...Ask her how many times you have asked her to call before coming over...If your worried about getting sued for a vet bill - I wouldn't worry...

[frankykeno]

Meme, the first thing that jumped out at me was the myspace demand for vet costs reimbursement. This is a friend, one apparently close enough to you to show up unannounced (even after you requested she call first), to walk into your home, to call herself your friend. Why would she use a go between like a myspace message to make her demand? My gut instinct is because she knows in her heart of hearts she doesn't deserve this cash.

Meme, you've told this person to call first before she visits with her dogs. You've told her that because you didn't want to see her dogs hurt. You've kennelled your dogs to avoid her dogs getting hurt. Truthfully if she was a smart dog owner and a good friend - why is she even putting her small dogs at risk and creating work for you in your own home? It's not like the dogs have to come visit with her is it?

She walked in unannounced, with her dogs loose into your home after being told not to repeatedly, after having visited previously and knowing Sway might bite her dogs. Even when her dog was hurt, let's be honest here, she didn't seek vet care until you made her do so.

I'm sorry hon but even though it may strain this friendship, I see no place where you were in anyway remiss in your duties as a responsible dog owner. She created this situation, even knowing the risk to her dog, she didn't get immediate care for her dog, therefore creating a far greater health issue and a far greater vet bill - it's her problem though she may not like that answer.

[wilomn]

She knew your dog didn't like other animals.

You told her many times not to come unannounced and strongly hinted that bringing her dog could cause trouble.

She disregarded your hints.

She is SOAL. ---- out of luck.

There is no way you should be paying her bill, not any part of it.

You feel bad because you're a nice person.

She has an injured dog because she is arrogant and stupid.

It's a shame it happened but there is not a bit of fault to be found that points to you. It is all squarely hers.

[MeMe]

Meme, the first thing that jumped out at me was the myspace demand for vet costs reimbursement. This is a friend, one apparently close enough to you to show up unannounced (even after you requested she call first), to walk into your home, to call herself your friend. Why would she use a go between like a myspace message to make her demand? My gut instinct is because she knows in her heart of hearts she doesn't deserve this cash.

Meme, you've told this person to call first before she visits with her dogs. You've told her that because you didn't want to see her dogs hurt. You've kennelled your dogs to avoid her dogs getting hurt. Truthfully if she was a smart dog owner and a good friend - why is she even putting her small dogs at risk and creating work for you in your own home? It's not like the dogs have to come visit with her is it?

She walked in unannounced, with her dogs loose into your home after being told not to repeatedly, after having visited previously and knowing Sway might bite her dogs. Even when her dog was hurt, let's be honest here, she didn't seek vet care until you made her do so.

I'm sorry hon but even though it may strain this friendship, I see no place where you were in anyway remiss in your duties as a responsible dog owner. She created this situation, even knowing the risk to her dog, she didn't get immediate care for her dog, therefore creating a far greater health issue and a far greater vet bill - it's her problem though she may not like that answer.

OMG...you have totally made every point I made.

I am going to post the myspcae messages so you all can read what I told her. I will delete her name since she is not here to defend herself.

[frankykeno]

Last point, and one I feel strongly about as a dog owner myself. You should not impose your pet on others. If you cannot respect other people, their property, their dogs, you shouldn't own a dog in the first place. I cannot imagine taking our dog Bella into anyone's home unless I first got permission and then under tight leash control, made sure their dog and mine could visit peacefully.

My dearest friend visited recently for the weekend. She asked first if she could bring her young pup along. We made sure Sandy and Bella were on leash and introduced them carefully. Even off leash we watched them closely. It was fine and Bella even allowed Sandy in her kennel to nap with her (darn cute!).

The point of this is, this is a woman that is like a sister to me, yet even she asked first and would have respected my decision if I felt it was not safe to have those two dogs together in my home.

[mooingtricycle]

well now..I never said to her "Don't bring them here" I gave many...very NOT so subtle hints to her about it.

She did tell me she was coming over, sometime that day...but I told her to call when she was ACUTALLY on her way so I could make sure my dogs were up.

Sway was up. but as I said...the only one that knew she had entered the house was Kyle. Not any adult.

Well, i suppose it depends on how you feel about the situation.

I personally feel its entirely her fault. If i told someone several times ( which is way more than i would allow anyone a free chance at listening to my words)
To CALL me before they came over, or that My dogs wanted to attack others, I wouldnt feel responsible. Is that what it takes for someone to get a hint? something like having their dog attacked to finally wisen up and heed ones words?

Why not just tell her flat out in the future "dont bring the dogs". Better to avoid a potential situation like this again completely. Though, at this point... im sure that wont even be a question anymore.