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  1. #1
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    Loss of a friend

    Recently my Central American boa, Hebe, passed away. I love all of my animals, but I'd had him for years and developed a serious emotional attachment to him. What happened was I saw he was uncomfortable and had a retained eye cap, so I attempted to take it off. That didn't work, so I took him to the vet and spent about $100 for him to say it wouldn't be a problem and to leave it. I checked on him every day, and made sure he was alright. Saturday night I checked on him before heading to bed, and he looked fine (as fine as he can with a swollen eye).

    The next day I left for a reptile expo and didn't look at him in the morning. I looked at him Sunday night and found him dead, looking severely dehydrated and, frankly, emaciated. He had eaten about three weeks prior to his death.

    I may post something more about his actual cause of death (because the vet proved to be NO HELP whatsoever), but that's not what this thread is about. I want to know some coping skills for when an animal you loved passes away suddenly. Any help will be appreciated, as I'm having a really hard time dealing with this at this point in my life. Thank you.

    ~AJ
    Last edited by lingooisit; 01-30-2017 at 10:20 AM.

  2. #2
    BPnet Senior Member Sonny1318's Avatar
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    Sorry for you loss.

  3. #3
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    Re: Loss of a friend

    I am so sorry

  4. #4
    BPnet Lifer Reinz's Avatar
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    Sorry for your loss AJ.

    I can tell you that I have lost family dogs that were very close companions and protectors of my children, they WERE family.

    I think reminiscing by talking about them and looking at photos helped. But the absolute best coping tool for our family was to get a new puppy. Puppies bring so much joy and can uplift any sad heart.

    In your case, maybe a new Boa or other snake is just the thing?
    The one thing I found that you can count on about Balls is that they are consistent about their inconsistentcy.

    1.2 Coastal Carpet Pythons
    Mack The Knife, 2013
    Lizzy, 2010
    Etta, 2013
    1.1 Jungle Carpet Pythons
    Esmarelda , 2014
    Sundance, 2012
    2.0 Common BI Boas, Punch, 2005; Butch, age?
    0.1 Normal Ball Python, Elvira, 2001
    0.1 Olive (Aussie) Python, Olivia, 2017

    Please excuse the spelling in my posts. Auto-Correct is my worst enema.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to Reinz For This Useful Post:

    CALM Pythons (01-30-2017)

  6. #5
    BPnet Senior Member CALM Pythons's Avatar
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    Im not sure what anyone can tell any of us that feel our heart is empty after loosing a close friend. Ive always surounded myself with several pets. I have to tell myself that I shouldnt feel sad when it's their time to go, but I should laugh & smile thinking about the experiance we had together. We may all be reunited someday again
    Name: Christian
    0.1 Albino Ball (Sophie)
    0.1 Russo White Diamond (Grace)
    1.0 Hypo Burmese (Giacomo/AKA Jock)
    1.2 Razors Edge/Gotti & American Pit Bull
    ----------
    1.1 Albino/Normal Burmese (Mr & Mrs Snake)
    1.0 Albino Ball (Sully)

  7. #6
    Registered User Nellasaur's Avatar
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    I find that for some people, memorializing the lost one somehow can help, and there are a lot of ways to do so. If you're a creative person, you could try writing something, an online post or a journal entry reflecting on Hebe's life and what he meant to you. If you want a tangible reminder you could sculpt or paint a likeness of him, or create a photo collage to hang, or even just get a nice photo framed as a remembrance. (You could commission an artist or a creative friend to do any of these things as well.)

    You could make a donation in Hebe's name to your local animal welfare society or reptile group, purchase a memorial at a pet cemetery, or get a memorial of some kind made for your home or yard.

    Like Reinz suggesting, even just looking at photos and telling stories about him may be able to help you with the sudden loss.

    You have my condolences, and I hope you're able to find a way to cope with this that works for you. I'm definitely sorry to hear about your snake.

  8. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Nellasaur For This Useful Post:

    B.P.'s 4me (11-11-2017),lingooisit (01-31-2017)

  9. #7
    BPnet Senior Member StillBP's Avatar
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    so sorry for your loss
    Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

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    lingooisit (01-31-2017)

  11. #8
    BPnet Veteran Bassball Fever's Avatar
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    Sorry for you loss. The only advice I can give is to celebrate the years you had together. And remember, everybody grieves differently. Do what you need to do.

  12. #9
    BPnet Senior Member cletus's Avatar
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    Very sorry to hear of this.

  13. #10
    Registered User Sallos's Avatar
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    Nothing makes it better aside from letting the grieving process run its course. You can take comfort in that the pain you feel is because you cared very much for your friend.

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