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  1. #1
    Venom Life Neal's Avatar
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    Most ironic/funny thing that happened to me so far.

    So I'm laying down and I get a text from a number I don't recognize saying: "I'm pregnant."

    So my initial thing was to go through my head and count off who I've been with in the time from of 9 months. I crossed those off immediately because of the area code but I was still concerned it was a girl from June, which would put her around 8 months. That was only until I rationed that her mother or grandmother which are friends with me would of told me way before that.

    So naturally this is how the rest of the convo went:

    Me: And I don't know who you are?
    Them: From about a month and a half ago? God how many girls do you smash rawdog.

    Now at this point, I know it's not possible becasue I've been in a foul mood with two friends and my aunt passing, my aunt which was in the beginning of January. So I'm just humoring the person now, and the whole "smash" thing threw me off because most proper people don't use that term, especially girls, and rawdog was kind of out the blue as well. Regardless, I thought I'd humor them.

    Me: But congrats?
    Me: Lol. Nice try. Who's this anyways?
    Them: You don't remember me? You answered my ad on craigslist about a month and a half ago
    Me: I don't look on craigslist for sex or chicks.
    Me: And I'm a virgin
    Them: BS I met you there
    Me: Okay. But that doesn't change the fact I'm a virgin.
    Them: Lol that's a lie you d'ed me down like no man before
    Me: Lol. You've got jokes.
    Them: No babe I'm for real
    Me: Well let me do it again. Come over. Lol.
    Them: Lol wtf
    Me: I'm just playing along
    Them: I just text a random # for s and giggles
    Me: I figured.
    Me: I hope you're a chick though otherwise you've got a strong feminist side. Lol.
    Them: You were scared don't lie
    Them: Lol I'm totally a chick
    Me: I'm honestly not. I'd man up to my responsibilities if it were true.
    Me: But how are you doing. I'm Neal.
    Them: I'm Lindsey nice to meet ya

    So for the past few hours I've been talking to this person, who texted me from her actual cell instead of her work phone. She seems pretty cool though. However, she won't give me her last name to look her up on facebook. This is mainly because I'm curious as to what she looks like so I can start my game .

    I just figured I'd share with you all to make you laugh and I left it family friendly, or at least I think I did so that way it doesn't get moved to QT.

    EDIT:
    I will let you know if she's hot or not though if/when I manage to get her facebook or a picture, lol.
    Last edited by Neal; 02-14-2014 at 11:23 PM.
    -Venomous-

    1.0 - Naja siamensis - Zeus (Black & White Spitting Cobra)
    1.0 - Naja n. woodi - Hades (Black Spitting Cobra)
    0.1 - Naja nigricollis - Athena (Black-necked Spitting Cobra)

    coming at some point in the future
    Naja annulata (Ringed Water Cobra)




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  3. #2
    BPnet Lifer sho220's Avatar
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    My first reaction would have been "Hey! Wanna see my balls?"...
    Lucifer Sam, Siam cat...
    Always sitting by your side,
    Always by your side...
    That cat's something I can't explain...

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  5. #3
    Venom Life Neal's Avatar
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    Re: Most ironic/funny thing that happened to me so far.

    Quote Originally Posted by sho220 View Post
    My first reaction would have been "Hey! Wanna see my balls?"...
    Well, my first reaction was: "Oh crap."
    -Venomous-

    1.0 - Naja siamensis - Zeus (Black & White Spitting Cobra)
    1.0 - Naja n. woodi - Hades (Black Spitting Cobra)
    0.1 - Naja nigricollis - Athena (Black-necked Spitting Cobra)

    coming at some point in the future
    Naja annulata (Ringed Water Cobra)




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  7. #4
    Don't Push My Buttons JLC's Avatar
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    Re: Most ironic/funny thing that happened to me so far.

    Careful, Neal! My first question would have been "How old are you?" Sounds like a stunt a 14 or 15 year old would pull.
    -- Judy

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  9. #5
    BPnet Veteran Mephibosheth1's Avatar
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    Keep us posted...perhaps you've found your soul mate via prank texting!!
    CRYSTAL MEPH



    1.0 100% Het for Carmel Normal–Mycroft (P. regius)
    1.2 Manx, Scottish Fold, Tabby–Mocha, Precious, Kitty-Beau (F. domesticus)
    30.90 Breeder Mice (M. musculus)



    "It will all be okay in the end. If it's not okay, its not the end"
    –John Lennon//oo\\

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  11. #6
    Venom Life Neal's Avatar
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    Re: Most ironic/funny thing that happened to me so far.

    Quote Originally Posted by JLC View Post
    Careful, Neal! My first question would have been "How old are you?" Sounds like a stunt a 14 or 15 year old would pull.
    LOL, good point. I think the only reason I didn't ask this is because after texting back and forth she told me what she did for a living and then texted me from another number and said this was her actual cell phone that the other one was a company phone. So I'm assuming she's at least 18 to have a company phone, then she said she's majoring in something in school, forgot what it was. But yea, I'll have to make sure she shows me her ID if we ever meet lol.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mephibosheth1 View Post
    Keep us posted...perhaps you've found your soul mate via prank texting!!
    I will do, but I highly doubt my soul mate would just appear in my lap like that. Although it would be great and make for a great story lol.
    -Venomous-

    1.0 - Naja siamensis - Zeus (Black & White Spitting Cobra)
    1.0 - Naja n. woodi - Hades (Black Spitting Cobra)
    0.1 - Naja nigricollis - Athena (Black-necked Spitting Cobra)

    coming at some point in the future
    Naja annulata (Ringed Water Cobra)




  12. #7
    BPnet Lifer h00blah's Avatar
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    Lindsey is probably a fake name. It's probably a friend playing a prank on you . Proceed with caution lol.
    Quote Originally Posted by reixox View Post
    BPs are like pokemon. you tell yourself you're not going to get sucked in. but some how you just gotta catch'em all.

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  14. #8
    BPnet Veteran steve_r34's Avatar
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    Ask her if she likes colorful big balls .... lmao
    1.1 het pied ,1.1 pastel,1. butter, .1 spider , .1 fire ph ghost , .1 pastave


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  16. #9
    BPnet Senior Member Slim's Avatar
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    My money is still on her being a him...
    Thomas "Slim" Whitman
    Never Met A Ball Python I Didn't Like

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  18. #10
    Venom Life Neal's Avatar
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    Oh I'm just talking to them because they seem pretty cool. Plus since I'm single and had nothing better to do it kept me occupied.
    -Venomous-

    1.0 - Naja siamensis - Zeus (Black & White Spitting Cobra)
    1.0 - Naja n. woodi - Hades (Black Spitting Cobra)
    0.1 - Naja nigricollis - Athena (Black-necked Spitting Cobra)

    coming at some point in the future
    Naja annulata (Ringed Water Cobra)




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