Restarting my Weight Loss journey

[sissysnakes]

The only thing I can suggest is taking it one day at a time. Any kind of eating disorder is similar to all addictions.. once you start and find that release its hard as hell to quite. A good mantra is "just for today." Don't try to think of forever, just literally do it for Today and then tomorrow.. just do tomorrow. I think its wonderful you want to make a change in you life, and I wish you the best of luck. You are not the only person out there, you are not alone.. and feel free to keep us posted!

I agree with seeing a therapist.. It is really truly amazing how much it can help.

[DooLittle]

Good for you! I used to run, and really need to get back at it, and get in better shape too. Time and ambition are my problems, after I work all day and come home and take care of my family and animals, I'm usually pooped out. I would say start with baby steps, don't go all out or you may get burnt out on it. Just stick with it. We are all here if you need us!

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[JackSprat]

I really applaud you opening up like that. That is really difficult! I am in nursing school and have been studying eating disorders. The topic is a great interest of mine because my sister died from bulimia 2 years ago. Its wonderful that you are trying to conquer the binge eating disorder. Do you have any professional help and support set up? Doing it on your own can be overwhelming. A great website that I have used a lot is www.nationaleatingdisorders.org I think you're off to a great start by opening up and I'm cheering for you. Thanks for sharing.

Jacky

[Marissa@MKmorphs]

I have gone to see a therapist once in high school but the woman had very little knowledge of eating disorders and she thought I was just making up my BED. I have thought about going to see a therapist for both my weight and dealing with the stress of school.


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[JackSprat]

I really think that would help a great deal. I don't know your insurance situation but that always proved to be a big issue with my sister's struggles. You should talk to your doctor and see if they could recommend someone that takes insurance or medicaid. It is a medical condition that you have, and not just a weight problem. There are also support groups available online and you could search for one in your area. Keep pushing until you find the help that you need.

[MrLang]

I've lost about 20 lbs in the last 3 months. I realize that's not much, but here's why it's significant:

I'm not doing anything "to lose weight" - that's how you set yourself up to fail. That's how the loss is unsustainable. My weight loss is a function of 2 simple ideas combined with a couple of important facts.

Facts:

Your heart is the most important muscle in your body. It needs to be active to stay strong. Forget losing weight. You want to have a healthy heart, right? Activity is the only way to achieve that.

When you gain weight, your body doesn't ever 'reset' itself like a lot of people believe. When you reach 295, even if you get down to 150 lbs, 2,000 calories a day will return your body to your highest weight. Your metabolism 'adjusts' upwards, but not downwards. This is scientific fact at this point in obesity research. You can't ever lose weight and then 'return to normal' and eat like those wretched skinny folks. If you get skinny and return to a 2,000 calorie diet, you'll balloon up. This is why so many people 'YO YO' as you called it. It's quite sucky, but it's true and you HAVE to internalize it. You want to be a lower weight than you are now? You're going to need to eat a reduced calorie diet FOREVER. Instead of having to 'be vigilant forever' just rebuild your lifestyle. It's quite easy. Similarly you could offset that with a higher than average amount of physical activity. Again, this would be a change in lifestyle and not a forced habit. My internalization was realizing that any single pound over my highest weight ever I go, I have to eat that much less and be that much more active to maintain a healthy weight FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. Don't dare get discouraged at that moment.

Shift in perspective:

Your weight is a simple function of calories in over calories out. What you eat and how active you are. You set yourself up to fail when THAT'S THE FOCUS POINT, though. Instead, consider changing your perspective to simply be a healthy person. Don't do it for the weight, do it because life is better and easier this way.

Food is for sustenance. Anyone who goes out for dinner with friends and 'pigs out' is in the wrong perspective. Food is for energy and to return nutrients to your body. You care about the quality of feeders you give to your pet snakes. You need to care about what you put into your own body. Remember, this isn't about losing weight, it's about becoming a healthy person. Your body is your temple, you are what you eat, etc. Internalize it. Food is not fun. It can be, but it's not meant to be. Good food and eating healthy are not mutually exclusive, as well. You just need to have basic consciousness for what you're eating. REALLY think about what it is you're putting into your mouth and swallowing. A lot of the best foods become instantly disgusting. The last time I thought I wanted a McDouble I took 2 bites and almost threw up. That's how I knew I am doing this right.

Being active can and is fun if you do it right. Am I going to the gym? Hell no. The gym sucks... Am I running around outside and bursting sweat everywhere and being miserable? Hell no. We live very sedentary lifestyles though. My perspective changed on physical activity when I realized it doesn't have to be one or the other. I don't know what things you enjoy, but nature and the outdoors are very important to me. I like going fast. I like seeing things and getting places. I picked up a pair of rollerblades from a yard sale. I liked that when I was a kid. Sure enough, I still love it! I couldn't believe how much more fun I had zipping around on rollerblades in a parking lot than I had been having watching TV after work. I bought a pair of hiking boots. I go hiking now quite regularly not because I need to get my workout or activity in, but because I ACTUALLY ENJOY IT. There are plenty of active hobbies you can pick up that aren't 'exercise.' Think about what you liked as an active child and try them out again.

One last note about food perspective that was nice to me. Good food choices are much easier than people make them out to be. You only need to make those choices for like an hour every week or 2... when you're shopping. Eat a solid meal before you go. Forget your hunger. Use your brain. A diet should consist of something like 60% fruits and veggies, 30% carbs and starches, and 10% fats... whatever the food pyramid says lol. That's the loose outline I use. Again, food is for sustenance and a whole bunch of very smart scientists figured out what the ideal diet for a human is. You look up care sheets for your pets? Look one up for yourself. As I shop, I make sure to spend my time and money appropriately. YOU KNOW what foods are bad. DON'T BUY THEM. JUST DON'T. Don't buy = don't eat. You only need to control yourself in the supermarket to win on that one. You'll save money by not buying food out. Go into a convenience store. Water is the only item in the whole place you have any business ingesting into your body. Do some research about the foods you find there if you don't believe me. It's gross stuff. Just internalize that.

I lost 20 lbs and counting by being conscious of the foods I am ingesting for sustenance. My body isn't a trash can. No garbage or waste goes in it. If I'm full, the food goes to the trash. If it's already trash, it doesn't go into my body. Sorry African children. Next time I will make a smaller portion. Eating a proper human diet has loads of positive side effects. I don't wake up having to crap my brains out all the time. I don't have gas all the time. I don't get weird raging hunger pains. I don't feel all gross and bloated all the time.

I lost 20 lbs and counting by doing things I like that happen to be active more. Rollerblading, hiking, and kayaking are way more fun to me than sitting on the couch. I used to think I was so tired after work all day. It's simply not true. When you're not in a food coma all the time you'll be surprised how your energy levels change.

Did not mean to write a book here, but I don't feel like editing any of that out since I'm already struggling to fit what I've got to say here. If you want to talk more PM me Good luck and if there's one takeaway from this:

You want to become a healthy person. Weight loss is going to be a satisfying side effect of that process.

[Marissa@MKmorphs]

My school has some Therapists on site. I do have insurance through my dad so maybe I'll check and see what therapists near me might specialize in eating disorders. I would be interested in seeing if there was any sort of groups near me too. I don't know anyone else that has BED so It would be good to have someone who could relate


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[ballpythonluvr]

I've lost about 20 lbs in the last 3 months. I realize that's not much, but here's why it's significant:

I'm not doing anything "to lose weight" - that's how you set yourself up to fail. That's how the loss is unsustainable. My weight loss is a function of 2 simple ideas combined with a couple of important facts.

Facts:

Your heart is the most important muscle in your body. It needs to be active to stay strong. Forget losing weight. You want to have a healthy heart, right? Activity is the only way to achieve that.

When you gain weight, your body doesn't ever 'reset' itself like a lot of people believe. When you reach 295, even if you get down to 150 lbs, 2,000 calories a day will return your body to your highest weight. Your metabolism 'adjusts' upwards, but not downwards. This is scientific fact at this point in obesity research. You can't ever lose weight and then 'return to normal' and eat like those wretched skinny folks. If you get skinny and return to a 2,000 calorie diet, you'll balloon up. This is why so many people 'YO YO' as you called it. It's quite sucky, but it's true and you HAVE to internalize it. You want to be a lower weight than you are now? You're going to need to eat a reduced calorie diet FOREVER. Instead of having to 'be vigilant forever' just rebuild your lifestyle. It's quite easy. Similarly you could offset that with a higher than average amount of physical activity. Again, this would be a change in lifestyle and not a forced habit. My internalization was realizing that any single pound over my highest weight ever I go, I have to eat that much less and be that much more active to maintain a healthy weight FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. Don't dare get discouraged at that moment.

Shift in perspective:

Your weight is a simple function of calories in over calories out. What you eat and how active you are. You set yourself up to fail when THAT'S THE FOCUS POINT, though. Instead, consider changing your perspective to simply be a healthy person. Don't do it for the weight, do it because life is better and easier this way.

Food is for sustenance. Anyone who goes out for dinner with friends and 'pigs out' is in the wrong perspective. Food is for energy and to return nutrients to your body. You care about the quality of feeders you give to your pet snakes. You need to care about what you put into your own body. Remember, this isn't about losing weight, it's about becoming a healthy person. Your body is your temple, you are what you eat, etc. Internalize it. Food is not fun. It can be, but it's not meant to be. Good food and eating healthy are not mutually exclusive, as well. You just need to have basic consciousness for what you're eating. REALLY think about what it is you're putting into your mouth and swallowing. A lot of the best foods become instantly disgusting. The last time I thought I wanted a McDouble I took 2 bites and almost threw up. That's how I knew I am doing this right.

Being active can and is fun if you do it right. Am I going to the gym? Hell no. The gym sucks... Am I running around outside and bursting sweat everywhere and being miserable? Hell no. We live very sedentary lifestyles though. My perspective changed on physical activity when I realized it doesn't have to be one or the other. I don't know what things you enjoy, but nature and the outdoors are very important to me. I like going fast. I like seeing things and getting places. I picked up a pair of rollerblades from a yard sale. I liked that when I was a kid. Sure enough, I still love it! I couldn't believe how much more fun I had zipping around on rollerblades in a parking lot than I had been having watching TV after work. I bought a pair of hiking boots. I go hiking now quite regularly not because I need to get my workout or activity in, but because I ACTUALLY ENJOY IT. There are plenty of active hobbies you can pick up that aren't 'exercise.' Think about what you liked as an active child and try them out again.

One last note about food perspective that was nice to me. Good food choices are much easier than people make them out to be. You only need to make those choices for like an hour every week or 2... when you're shopping. Eat a solid meal before you go. Forget your hunger. Use your brain. A diet should consist of something like 60% fruits and veggies, 30% carbs and starches, and 10% fats... whatever the food pyramid says lol. That's the loose outline I use. Again, food is for sustenance and a whole bunch of very smart scientists figured out what the ideal diet for a human is. You look up care sheets for your pets? Look one up for yourself. As I shop, I make sure to spend my time and money appropriately. YOU KNOW what foods are bad. DON'T BUY THEM. JUST DON'T. Don't buy = don't eat. You only need to control yourself in the supermarket to win on that one. You'll save money by not buying food out. Go into a convenience store. Water is the only item in the whole place you have any business ingesting into your body. Do some research about the foods you find there if you don't believe me. It's gross stuff. Just internalize that.

I lost 20 lbs and counting by being conscious of the foods I am ingesting for sustenance. My body isn't a trash can. No garbage or waste goes in it. If I'm full, the food goes to the trash. If it's already trash, it doesn't go into my body. Sorry African children. Next time I will make a smaller portion. Eating a proper human diet has loads of positive side effects. I don't wake up having to crap my brains out all the time. I don't have gas all the time. I don't get weird raging hunger pains. I don't feel all gross and bloated all the time.

I lost 20 lbs and counting by doing things I like that happen to be active more. Rollerblading, hiking, and kayaking are way more fun to me than sitting on the couch. I used to think I was so tired after work all day. It's simply not true. When you're not in a food coma all the time you'll be surprised how your energy levels change.

Did not mean to write a book here, but I don't feel like editing any of that out since I'm already struggling to fit what I've got to say here. If you want to talk more PM me Good luck and if there's one takeaway from this:

You want to become a healthy person. Weight loss is going to be a satisfying side effect of that process.

This is just an awesome response! I read this and it was like a reality check! I will be taking this advice and following it very closely. Thank you!

[MrLang]

This is just an awesome response! I read this and it was like a reality check! I will be taking this advice and following it very closely. Thank you!

This makes me very, very happy

Time to continue preaching:

The other thing I wanted to comment after reading through the last few posts again is that I find it inherently dangerous to slap labels on everything. Human beings are variable. They are adaptable. We like to slap labels on people who vary and adapt themselves into a minority perspective. Eff that. Get over the 'I have a problem that's out of my hands' mode. It's entirely in your hands. The human brain is much more powerful than people give it credit for. I think 'disorder' and 'addiction' are really volatile, dangerous, self-loathing words. More importantly, they strip you of power that you have.

I used to be a fairly serious heroin addict. You won't see me saying that in any other threads and I'll probably regret documenting that here at some point. I need to share it because I don't want to hear any 'you've never had a REAL problem' crap. 'It's too hard' reads 'you don't really want it then' to me. You think it's hard not to stop at McDonald's on the way home? Try shooting up. I promise they're not even on the same level of desire or attraction. But when you're not a drug addict, the idea of shooting up is not very exciting. See? Perspective.

People sit around at AA and feel sorry for themselves. One day at a time, etc. 'We're always alcoholics and addicts, we're just in recovery forever.' That's a load of crap. You WANT to get clean off drugs? That must mean you want to be a sober person. That must mean you ARE a sober person. Maybe you should stop using drugs... it's very uncharacteristic of a sober person. Moreover, as a sober person you need to ask yourself why you willingly sit in a room full of people who are still openly labeling themselves as addicts. I'd keep away from the therapy if I were you.

It works.

[Fidget]

Marissa, I want to wish you success in meeting your goals, but I also want to tell you when I look at your pictures, the first thing I see is not "the fat girl." It's a beautiful, active woman with a great smile doing cool stuff with her friends and not letting her size or shape hold her back from enjoying her life.

I hope you can see that too.