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  1. #1
    BPnet Veteran RPlank's Avatar
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    Male chauvenist pig! I didn't write this list, but I did laugh!
    (for the record, my wife thought it was stupid. )

    Why Dogs are Better than Women
    1. Dogs don't cry (unless they have to pee).
    2. Dogs love it when your friends come over.
    3. Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo.
    4. Dogs think you sing great.
    5. A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
    6. Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
    7. The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you
    8. Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
    9. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
    10. Dogs are excited by rough play.
    11. Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.
    12. Dogs understand that farts are funny.
    13. Dogs love red meat.
    14. Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.
    15. Anyone can get a good-looking dog.
    16. If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
    17. Dogs don't shop.
    18. Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
    19. A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
    20. Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
    21. A dog's parents never visit.
    22. Dogs love long car trips.
    23. Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
    24. Dogs understand that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.
    25. When a dog gets old and starts to snap at you incessantly, you can shoot it.
    26. Dogs like beer.
    27. Dogs don't hate their bodies.
    28. No dog ever bought a Kenny G or Hootie & the Blowfish album.
    29. No dog ever put on 100 pounds after reaching adulthood.
    30. Dogs never criticize.
    31. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
    32. Dogs never expect gifts.
    33. It's legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.
    34. Dogs don't worry about germs.
    35. Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had.
    36. Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to in your wallet, desk, and the back of your sock drawer.
    37. Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.
    38. Dogs would rather have you buy them a hamburger dinner than a lobster one.
    39. You never have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go 24 hours a day.
    40. Dogs have no use for flowers, cards, or jewelry.
    41. Dogs don't borrow your shirts.
    42. Dogs never want foot-rubs.
    43. Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.
    44. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.
    45. Dogs can't talk.
    46. Dogs aren't catty.
    47. Dogs seldom outlive you.
    Randy

    "I think it might be helpful for everyone to remember that the purpose of a forum like this is to EXCHANGE IDEAS, not dictate what is right or wrong or good or bad. If you disagree with what someone else is suggesting, you can say so without being argumentative or completely slamming the guy (or girl)." - Smynx

  2. #2
    BPnet Veteran
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    Yes, you can call me a

    That's pretty funny. he!! I'm a girl, and I still thought they were all basically reality.


    You male chauvenist pig!!! LOL j/k, I just said it cuz you told me I could. :p

    Where did you find that?
    Jennifer

  3. #3
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    hahaha thats funny because its true!!
    Girlfriend: Your room smells like reptile!!!
    Me: Are you saying my balls smell??

  4. #4
    BPnet Veteran RPlank's Avatar
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    Don't remember. I found it a couple years ago on the internet, and have saved it ever since! You can also call me a pack-rat! LOL!
    Randy

    "I think it might be helpful for everyone to remember that the purpose of a forum like this is to EXCHANGE IDEAS, not dictate what is right or wrong or good or bad. If you disagree with what someone else is suggesting, you can say so without being argumentative or completely slamming the guy (or girl)." - Smynx

  5. #5
    BPnet Veteran
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    You pack-rat!


  6. #6
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    I commented on another forum I visited today about why we call mean spirited, selfish, angry, etc. women "*****es". I mean, really, all the female dogs I've known were nothing like that. All the female dogs we've ever kept were loving, unselfish, fun, caring, warm, nurturing, etc.

    I mean, if that's what a "*****" is really like, couldn't we all stand to be a bit more "*****y"?
    We do not quit playing because we grow old; we grow old because we quit playing.

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