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  1. #1
    No One of Consequence wilomn's Avatar
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    Where Does Chocolate Come From?

    Where does Chocolate come from?
    "Gather round little bucks and does," Grampy Leatherfoot said, "and I'll tell you where chocolate eggs come from."

    All the little bunny friends scampered and scurried to their accostomed places, does on Grammy Knuckler's side and bucks on Grampy's, with the teenagers mixed in the back.

    Grampy didn't tell too many stories these days. With the sun out so long and dew being so sweet he tended to be out in the long field with the other oldsters ruminating about yesteryear.

    "Now, it's said by many that men," he siad, barely whispering the word men," brought chocolate with them from across the water. Whether they did or they discovered it here I'll not debate again."

    He eyed Grammy Knuckler with his good eye to see if she would have any input on this oft discussed subject but she just kept rocking and knitting and rocking and knitting, pretending the old man wasn't even there. She knew the fine points of annoying Grampy.

    "What's chocolate?" asked Natty Whitefeet, newly crawled from his mothers nest. "Do you eat it?"

    "WHAT'S CHOCOLATE!!!" yelled Grampy. "Who the bl"

    "GRAMPY...." Said Grammy Knuckler nice and quiet, never taking her eyes off her knitting or varying the rocking she enjoyed so much, "you are NOT about to swear in front of the kits. Are you." It was not a question.

    Grampy blustered and wiped his whiskers, longest in the warren by far, a time or two, wiggled what was left of his tail and settled back in his chair.

    "Woman, you know I don't swear no more," and under his breath, barely to be heard by the itty bitties in the front row, "blasted doe could hear a feather hit ground t'other side of the pond."

    Grammy's mouth curled just the tiniest bit as she heard him and pretended not to, knitting as if nothing had happened at all.

    "Now then, where was I?" Grampy asked. "Had the Eagle come yet or was the fox still chasing Willy Lighting Toes?"

    "Wrong story," the kits all yelled and laughed, the game well known to all but the very youngest. Grampy was far from forgetful.

    "Had Tommy the Bass spit Wiggly Jeans young one out yet?" he asked, feigning confusion.

    "No," they all yelled. "You were going to tell us about chocolate."

    "Chocolate? What's chocolate? Some newfangled plant? Some new forest animal? Where do you kits come up with this stuff?" he said and smiled, showing all six of the teeth he had left.

    "Grampy, you know it came with the men from over the big water," said Downy Doreen, she of the soft fur and big eyes. She was one of Grampy and Grammy's great great many times great grand daughters and one of the old mans favorites.

    "Oooh yeah, now I sort of seem to remember hearing one of their small ones talking about it long long ago. Way before any of you was even born."

    "I was in the meadow, chasing away hawks as I always did when I was young and hale," he said once again eyeing Grammy to see if she would have any more to say about hawks and chasing them, " when I came across the first human I had ever seen."

    "He was just laying there in the grass, almost invisible because the grass was so high, watching the sky and talking to himself."

    "That one looks like a buffalo and that one looks like a donkey......that one over there looks like the wagon Dad drove here and that one looks like his anvil," he was saying to himself while he pointed up at the sky.

    It took me a long time to figure out he was talking about the clouds and how they resembled things he was familiar with. At first I just figured he was eating mushrooms like those badgers who used to live over by the waterfall did. They were always seeing things no one else did. Finally though, he pointed to one and siad, "that one is a rabbit."

    Sure enough, when I looked up to see what he was pointing at if was the spitting image of Vander Highhop.

    At the mention of Vander, famous throughout the warren, a chorus of oooohs and aaahhs was heard. Everyone knew the story of Vander and Weasle. He was famous.

    "Don't you go getting those kits all worked up old man," Grammy said. "They just got settled and it's late. You wind em up and you'll be the one staying up with them."

    "mumble fumble rotten old.....mumble didn't like her so much I'd.....mumble mumble makes such a good clover pie, I'll tell you that much," Grampy was barely heard to say.

    "Now, the bear, he wasn't so smart this time and the bees, they...''

    "No Grampy" all the little ones yelled, "not the bears and the bees one, the where did chocolate come from one."

    "You sure?" he asked, squinting his face all wrinkly and walnutlike.

    "Yes," they yelled. "We're sure," they said as they elbowed and pushed each other while they laughed at Grampys memory.

    "Well then, let's get on with it. Where was I?"

    "The boy saw Vander HighHop in the sky," Theodore LongJumper said. Theodore was a distant relative of HighHop's and he was very proud of it.

    "The fire is burning pretty low, you sure you want to finish this tonight? We could always take it up tomorrow you know."

    "No no, tonight now, don't wait," they said all at the same time.

    "Alright then. He, the human boy, had just pointed out Vander and I was pondering what the other clouds looked like to me."

    He said then, the boy did, and that one looks just like the chocolate easter egg I got yesterday.

    Now, I had no idea what an easter was. I thought I knew all the creatures that laid eggs. There were the birds and newts and fish and some of the snakes and most of the lizards, the turtles and most of the insects but I had never in all my long life heard of this "easter" creature nor the chocolate egg it supposedly laid.

    "That was the best chocolate I ever ate," the boy said, licking his lips as he remembered. "I sure wish easter came more than once a year. I think chocolate is my favorite thing in the world to eat.''

    "Well, being the very clever rabbit that I have always been," at this Grammy Knuckler cleared her throat very loudly but didn't say anything, " as I was saying, being the clever rabbit that I have always been I figured that chocolate was something to eat and that the easter creature only laid these eggs infrequently."

    "What's infrequently?" asked May Flufftail, a very pretty but not too bright doe.

    Grampy screwed up one eye, closed the other and stared at May, looking her up and down like she was some new creature he hadn't seen before. "Who's in charge of teaching these youngsters nowadays?" he asked.

    "Still you and the other old bucks," came a voice from the back. "And you still don't fool anyone with that look old man."

    Grammy's sister LittleSpot Quicktongue was aptly named and frequently gone. The latter particularly pleased Grampy.

    "Infrequently, May, means not very often," she said as she hopped over to her sister, taking the rocker next in line and settling in to watch and listen.

    "Hrmph, well, yes, I suppose you're right Quicktongue, I suppose you're right. Leaving soon I hope?" he said as he faced the kits again.

    That boy was in our meadow and playing in our pond and picking our flowers every single day. And he talked to himseld like a Jaybird. Nonstop.

    I got to following him around just to hear what he was going to say next and he told the most outlandish stories.

    He said one time that when he lost a tooth a fairy, whatever that is, would come in the night and take it away and leave him a nickle. Whatever a nickle is. He seem glad to have it and said he could buy a whole chocolate bar with one.

    This confused me, bright as I was. If an Easter laid chocolate eggs, how could you buy a chocolate bar. What was a bar anyway.

    "Someone take Dewey and put him to bed," Grampy said, smiling at one of the smallest of the bunny children, ''he's fast asleep.''

    The very next day after the boy talked about chocolate bars he came to the pond and took a bright and shiney out of his pocket. This was one of the brightest shinyest bright and shinys I had ever seen. The sun reflected off it the way it does off the pond in the middle of summer, just before dark. All bright and wrinkly and almost painful to look at but beautiful enough that you can't look away.

    "I've waited long enough," the boy said to himself. "I lost my tooth a week ago, got my chocolate bar 4 days ago and now it 's time to eat my treat."

    Then he did the most amazing thing. He peeled that bright and shiny off what was under it like a snake crawling out of its skin. Then he took that bright and shiny and wadded it up and stuck it in his pocket while he brought the thing it had been covering up to his mouth and then he took a bite of it. He chewed and smiled like it was the best thing he had ever done.

    "Boy, I love chocolate. Chocolate bars, chocolate cake, chocolate eggs, chocolate pudding, chocolate anything but especially bars and eggs."

    I had been so intent on watching him eat and listening to him talk, that I didn't realize I had hopped out of the shade I had been hiding in until the boy looked at me, not surprised, not scared, just curious the way you kids mostly are, and he said to me, "hello Mr. Rabbit. Have you come to share my chocolate bar with me?"

    Then he threw a piece of it towards me. It smelled wonderful and my whiskers were a twitching like Grammy was...

    "Old Man," she said sharply, ''you go there and you WON'T be going there for a LONG time. Know what I mean?"

    "Erm, cough, hmmm, yes," Grampy said quietly. "Let me continue. My nose was amazed, my whiskers were working overtime. I hopped over and sniffed something I had never sniffed before. I sniffed it again and it smelled like it would be fantastic to taste. So I did."

    And it was, as most of you know, excellent. It was not like any plant I had ever tasted before. Sweeter than the lupines freshly nectared, yet bitter as cattail root the way it gets in fall, hard enough to be pleasant to take a bite of yet soft enough to chew immediately.

    Ahhhh, my first bite of chocolate.

    "So, you like that do ya boy?" said the boy. "I wish I had more for you but this is all I have right now. I have another loose tooth though and when it falls out I'll get another nickle and then I can get another chocolate bar and maybe mom has some leftover easter eggs. I'll check and see."

    I looked up at that boy, my eyes full of wonderment and joy, and knew my life would never be the same.

    He kept coming almost everyday but he almost never had chocolate. We'd see eachother at the pond or in the meadow, sometimes by the stream and he always recognized me. When he had chocolate he'd share, always telling me where it came from. A tooth lost and a nickle gained, a party, the easter creature and its eggs or best of all in the fall, just before winter there was a holloweed, a plant that must only grow in the houses that people live in because I've never seen one here where we live, that apparently was full of chocolate and he had plenty then, for days afterwards.

    Those were the good times, times of plenty for all.

    Then the boy stopped coming. I thought maybe a hawk or wolf got him and was as sad for that as for not having chocolate anymore.

    Then, just a few seasons ago, he came back. He wasn't a boy anymore though. I guess humans grow into adults too. He was taller and bigger and looked a little different but I knew it was him when I saw him.

    He had a little female human with him too. She was just as chattery as he had been, talking talking talking.

    "Daddy, do you think there are really still bunnies here? Grandma and Grandpa have lived here forever and maybe the bunnies are gone. Did they really eat chocolate? They didn't really, did they? Is it good for them? Why would they eat chocolate?"

    "Loribell, I have no clue why they ate it, I just know that they did. There was one guy in particular, long dead I'm sure since the last time I saw him I almost your age, that just loved it. He'd get is nose all wrikled up and his whiskers all twitchy and then he'd just go to town on whatever I tossed to him. It was pretty fun to watch."

    "I used to sit on this very log and talk to myself about all sorts of things way back then and he'd come out even when I didn't have anything to share. Let's sit and see if there are any bunnies left to share our easter eggs with, ok?"

    "Alright daddy, let's sit and watch," she said, wiping off the log her father had sat upon so long ago, not wanting to get her easter dress dirty, her easter basket full of chocolate eggs at her feet, ready to share if there really were any bunnies left.

    "Daddy look," she whispered. "It's the oldest bunnie in the world and he's looking right at us," she said as she reached for her basket.

    "That he is Loribell, that he is."

    And that kits and kittens, does and bucks, is where chocolate comes from.
    I may not be very smart, but what if I am?
    Stinky says, "Women should be obscene but not heard." Stinky is one smart man.
    www.humanewatch.org

  2. #2
    No One of Consequence wilomn's Avatar
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    This one has been around for a while. One of these days I'm going to polish it up nice and bright, but I sort of like it as it is too.
    I may not be very smart, but what if I am?
    Stinky says, "Women should be obscene but not heard." Stinky is one smart man.
    www.humanewatch.org

  3. #3
    Don't Push My Buttons JLC's Avatar
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    Re: Where Does Chocolate Come From?

    I missed this one last year, so it's a fresh read for me today. I love it! It's very sweet, if you don't mind me saying so.
    -- Judy

  4. #4
    No One of Consequence wilomn's Avatar
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    Keep on keeping on folks.
    I may not be very smart, but what if I am?
    Stinky says, "Women should be obscene but not heard." Stinky is one smart man.
    www.humanewatch.org

  5. #5
    No One of Consequence wilomn's Avatar
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    Another year, another 500 lbs of chocolate devoured.
    I may not be very smart, but what if I am?
    Stinky says, "Women should be obscene but not heard." Stinky is one smart man.
    www.humanewatch.org

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