Hey guys I miss ya'll as much as I miss my kids (snakes) that I had to give up last month. I wanted to open because I need prayers and just because I don't have my BPs and my one boa in my care at this time don't mean I am going to leave you guys.
On May 20 the pressure of everything got to me. I attempted to suicide. after smashing my lap top on a tile floor and telling my mom (whom I felt was pushing me way when I needed some support the most) that I give up everything since I can't seem to do anything right. I ran out of her house and to some thick woods. I had been seeking psychiatric care but I was at the end of my ropes. I blew up. I tried slicing my rest open. but I was sort of followed by a stranger. who found me before it was too late. I spent about 14 days in the hospital. I wanted to live I wanted to get out of feeling this way. and the hospital stabalized me enough to put me in a residential treatment where I am able to come and go during the day. Because the blow up at mom's house has now put me in a homeless situation even further, I have found a lot of services in the Houston area that can help me. I have a goal but I need to do it right and I can't rush into things I need to take things a day at a time. I have a couple addictions one of them is to my reptiles. but I need to be completely stable before I can look at getting any of them back. I am also in the mean time doing a 30 day video blog I am going to be posting on youtube soon about my after hospital recovery if yall are interested in seeing it let me know and I will put them here
We've lost all our control Our faces fall to the ground
We're powerless to your voice, And No longer seeming so, shattered, broke and all alone
Who do I belong To?
Not Earth, Not world, Not Evil, Not mortals, Not wretches
Who do I belong to?
Unchanging, Unbreaking, Unfailing, Creator, Immortal, Eternal
My deepest congratulations on getting on the right path!
As someone who had struggled with major and manic depression for most of my life I get where you're coming from, its really hard. I only within the last 3 years am really getting to where someone my age (24) should be emotionally and otherwise after over a 5 year black hole depression. I tried to commit myself, kill myself, and had the suicide prevention people out to my house more times than I'd like to recount.
I can promise you that with the right choices and you really wanting to get healthy again mentally that life can and will get better. I can really vividly remember truly not wanting to live anymore, not wanting to suffer anymore. But looking at where I am now and how far I've come, even as much as I suffered then, I am SO glad I didn't end it because I wouldn't be where I am now.
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Last edited by Coleslaw007; 06-06-2012 at 11:05 PM.
*0.1 Mojave (Kokopelli) *0.1 Pinstripe (Snizzy) *0.1 Bumblebee (Grace) *1.0 Super pastel butter (Beomike) *1.0 Mojave orange ghost (Houdini) *0.3 100% het orange ghosts (Lilly, Daisy, Pennywinkle) *0.1 Pastel 50% het orange ghost (Sunny) *1.1 PE Lemonback fires (Lemony, Lemoria) *1.0 Fire (Fire Lord Ozai) *0.1 Citrus Pastel (Clementine) *1.0 Albino (Archimedes) *0.1 Spider 100% het albino (Arachnia)
*1.0 Anery motley corn (Cthulhu) *G. rosea tarantula ('Rantula) *G. pulchripes (Phillius Don Pedro... really long name) *P. metallica (Lars) *A. versicolor (Typhoomerang) *C. cyaneopubescens (Rusko) *A. geniculata (Shelob) *B. smithi (deciding) *B. boehmei (El Super Beasto) *Nhandu chromatus
*1.0 Australian shepherd mix (Yoshi)